Well, in my earlier two posts I described my confrontation about the man with my wife. I am now getting that nauseated feeling in my stomach. I know, I told you so. Anyway, I guess now that I know someone else is involved should I continue plan A? I want to call and scream at her, but that will do no good. I really, really, hate this feeling. Good news, I move into my new apartment next Friday. Lots of single women in this place (easy, I am just kidding). I feel such a sense of loss. What does my knowing do for my wife? Help, hurt, both? Searching for some sense of what will come along next. This was never about space. I will post a definition of "I need some space and time"<P>I need my space: [TRANSLATION - Come within twenty feet of me and I'll scream rape - OR - I found someone else whom I want in my space instead of you.] This is the Mother of All Lies and almost certainly means adios the moment you hear it. You can safely assume that any or all of the other lies we've discussed are already being bandied about if you get the "I need my space" scenario. She wants out - period. No amount of pleading or bargaining is going to salvage this relationship, so don't embarrass yourself further by pursuing it. Back off, quickly and totally, and make a new life for yourself.<P>I think that pretty much sums it up eh?

Maybe time for Plan B.<P>I told my H I needed more space and the more I saw him the more he got on my nerves. But I am the BS. <P>Plan B will have her asking "Where did RobC go?"<BR>

((((((((((((((((((RobC))))))))))))))))))))<P>I know the gut thing all too well. <P>Firstly, Plan A is, according to MB principles, meant to continue for about six months, and should be presented flawlessly before moving into Plan B. I can't remember how long it's been for you.<P>I'd say the primary feelings your wife might be experiencing are guilt at hurting you, and sorry for this....relief that it's in the open. Remember, Rob, that's the fog.<P>Don't lose hope, because there are people who have made it through. Have you browsed the In Recovery forum...yes there are people there who still have difficulty, but there are success stories too. It does not mean the end.<P>

Hey RobC ((((()))))) to you.<BR>Well dear I hate to say it but, only you know if it is time for plan B.<BR>To me it sounds like your wife knows you know now. Where is she now? Whom is she with. Someties after the betrayer knows the spouse knows they have a change of heart and want to work thins out for they know how much it hurt you or that they know the repayed you for whatever they think you did wrong. However this is not always true. You need to ask her point blank Do you love me? Do you love other man? Do you want to work on our marriage?<BR>Rob only you know what is inside you. But do know that you have tried and if she does not come to you. It is her loss and I know right now you feel like you loss. <BR>Happiness comes from within.<P>Wishing you well<BR>Janet

Hi Rob,<P>I see you are up early.<P>If you do ask the questions Janet poses, be aware that you may not like the answers...and be prepared for WS waffle. Stuff like I don't know, I love you but not in love with you. That last one is a dead give away for an A...I don't think the "in love" phrase is part of a married person's vocabulary, but it certainly is if you are single, or acting like you are.<P>It stinks. I HATE the lies, they get my blood boiling more than anything...Geez, if WS's are gonna do something really bad to someone, at least admit it when you're asked!!!<P>Oh oh! I'm venting on your thread! Sorry!<P>Take special care of yourself today Rob...what do you think you can do to have a bit of YOU time?<P>love and light,<P>Jacky