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#704454 09/24/01 11:15 AM
Joined: Apr 2001
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I got a tax relief check in the mail, and it is both me and my exwife's name. And I cant cash it without her signing it also(i know i already tried). So that means i have to call her and have her met me at the bank. I havent talked to here or seen her in person since May. I am scared as hell.<P>------------------<BR>Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.

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I don't know how you feel yet, but I will and I am already worried about it...I won't see my H until January. <P>Can't you get someone to witness both of you signing, without you both being there at the same time? Check with thevbank. It is worth a try!!!

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Bioman--<P>I am not at all sure about your particular situation, but I'll wade in anyhow. If you feel uncomfortable around her then that kind of empowers her,if she senses your discomfort. Basically, you have to make a business transaction and you both need to do it. Simple. Sign your name and have her sign hers. You can even go ahead and shoot her a check right there for 1/2 so you don't need to see her again--insist on a receipt.<P>If you let her believe that you are not intimidated/upset/scared/whatever --then you take some control away from her without being rude or mean. You can do all of this while in Plan A mode. Sometimes it gets their attention when they realize that you still have, and can get on with, your life. take an "its just business, nothiong personal, attitude. <P>It'll be OK.

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What are you scared of? Are you scared of her intimidating you? I don't understand. Just remember there are worse situations out there and you can get through this.<P>I am living proof. When I cashed in my stock it was made payable solely in my name. My ex demanded half of it. I refused and he pulled his car behind me and would not let me leave and took my keys. I had to call the police just so I could leave. They talked him into giving me my check back. I needed it for basic things, towels, pots & pans, food because he wouldn't give me anything. The sad thing is, he is a cop too.<P>Then I was supposed to get back half of the income tax return. He had it automatically deposited into our account, but had me taken off as a signature on the account. It was only $137 so I would have gotten $68, but I was so afraid of his Dr.Jeckle/Mr.Hyde personality, I never pursued it. It wasn't worth my time and I didn't want to look at him or have anything to do with him.<P>Maybe you could send the check back and request 2 separate checks splitting it half and half. Just a suggestion, call the IRS and ask.

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just a note...what I did.<P>I sent check to x and had him sign it, and he sent it back along with a copy of his license, front and back, the bank said they would let me deposit it with those things done.<P>good luck


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