I have been with my spouse now for 1 1/2 years. Before we even met each other <BR>I had been in a relationship with another women that had broken my heart. It <BR>took me almost a year to forget about the whole thing and start to attemt <BR>love again. During the start of our relationship my spouse fell head over <BR>heals in love with me. I on the other hand still had my walls up still afraid <BR>to love again. My spouse was diagnosed with bi-polar manic deppresion at a <BR>young age and I wasnt very understanding during the beggining because my <BR>knowledge of Bi-Polar was limited and I didnt understand alot the reasons she <BR>did the things she did. In turn my reaction to not understanding things was <BR>anger. Being Bi-Polar usually comes with low self-esteem so when I became <BR>angry I was really herting her inside. I relized that my anger was there the <BR>whole time we where together but never really knew how bad it hert her. <BR>During the end I learned alot about Bi-Polar and alot about her. I learned to <BR>allow myself to love again and give myself to her 100% but by this time it <BR>was to late. During all this we learned she had become pregnant. She and I <BR>both have childern, myself having 1 daughter and my spouse having 1 daughter. <BR>Neither of us are the soul providers of our children. Last night was our last <BR>conversation. I have fought for the last month to win her love back but <BR>failed. I see in her eyes everytime i speak with her and from the tears that <BR>run down her face that she still loves me in soom sort of way and that I hert <BR>her intensly and I pray to god everyday for my forgivness. In tears, i begged <BR>for forgivness from her as well. I told myself if I ever had another child I <BR>would do whatever it takes to be a father to that child and keep my family <BR>together, WHATEVER IT TAKES. Now keep in mind we where never married. The <BR>pregnancy was a shock and birth control was being used. I love her with <BR>everything I am and I want this chance to be a father and make things right. <BR>Is there anything i can do to win her and this baby back in my life or any <BR>steps I can take to bring our family back together. I think God would want us <BR>to be together and I have been a firm beliver since my last marrige that <BR>couples should do what ever it takes to keep the love alive in a relationship <BR>because I never wanted to make that mistake again. Please someone give me <BR>there thoughts before its to late if its not to late already.<BR>