THREE SURGEONS<P>Three surgeons were discussing which types of patients they preferred to operate on. Doctor Waters said, "I prefer librarians. All of their organs are alphabetized."<BR>Doctor Franklin replied, "I prefer mathematicians because all of their organs are numbered."<P>Lastly, Doctor Zang responded, "I prefer lawyers. They are gutless, heartless, brainless, spineless, and their heads and rear ends are interchangeable."<BR>

THREE SISTERS<P>Three sisters aged 92, 94, and 96 live in a house together. One night, the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells down the stairs to her sisters, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?"<BR>The 94-year-old yells back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see."<P>She starts up the stairs and pauses, "Was I going up or down the stairs?" Meanwhile, the 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea, listening to her sisters.<P>She shakes her head and says, "I sure hope I never become that forgetful".<P>She knocks on wood for good measure. She then yells, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door."<P>

4 Letter Words<P>A young couple got married and went away on their honeymoon. When they returned, the bride immediately called her mother.<BR>"Well, how was the honeymoon?" asked the mother.<P>"Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic..." Suddenly, she burst out crying. "But mama, as soon as we returned, Sam started using the most horrible language. He's been saying things I've never heard before! All these awful 4-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me home... please mama!"<P>"Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What 4-letter words has he been using?"<P>"Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed! They're just too awful! You've got to come get me and take me home... please mama!"<P>"Darling, baby, you must tell me what's making you so upset... Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words."<P>Still sobbing, the bride replied, "Oh, mama... words like dust, wash, iron, cook..."<BR>

Wife knows BEST<P>One day a man and his wife were walking around the mall when they came across one of those penny scales that tells your fortune and weight.<BR>"Well," says his wife, "go ahead." He chuckles to himself and figures, why not? He drops in a coin and eagerly reads the results.<P>"Listen to this," he said to his wife, showing her a small, white card. "It says I'm energetic, bright, resourceful, and an absolutely great lover!"<P>"Yeah," his wife nodded, "and it has your weight wrong too!"<BR>

Jester, only 6 more!!<p>[This message has been edited by cinderella (edited October 01, 2001).]

LOVE Poem <P><BR>One morning, Billy Bob asked his work buddy Robert, "Man, why you always so dang happy when you come to work every day?"<BR>Robert replied, "That's because I make love to my wife every morning before work."<P>Amazed, Billy Bob asked him how he gets his wife to make love to him every morning. "That's easy," Robert said. "I just repeat this little poem that I made up to her. She loves it! It goes like this; Blonde hair, blonde hair, eyes so blue, I love waking up and making love to you!"<P>Billy Bob, amazed, said, "Man, you guys from the city is so dang sentimental." But he decided it wouldn't hurt to give it a try.<P>So he spent the rest of the day thinking up a poem for his wife. The next day, Billy Bob showed up to work all beat up with bruised eyes, a broken nose, a fat lip -- the works.<P>Robert asked, "Man, what happened to you?" <P>Billy Bob said, "I don't know, man. I went home and tried your advice that's all. I just uttered a poem..."<P>"Well, what did you say?"<P>Billy Bob told him: "Nappy head, nappy head, eyes like a frog... If I could roll your fat [censored] over, I'd do you like a dog."<BR> <BR>

BILL!!!<P>That last was a doozy!!!<P>Thanks for this thread, but I know you're just trying to get your 1000 posts which I see you finally did.<P>LOL!!! <P>Jacky<P>