How do you survive the holidays? I have been trying to get STBX to say what he likes for the holidays.<p>I let him come Halloween & take YS out Trick or Treating? I have offered him all of Thanksgiving Break form the 17th to the 25th. I am not sure what he is doing, but I believe he is taking them.<p>I have tried discussing Christmas, as YS still believes or says he does, we have agreed St Nick only one place. I have asked to have them Christmas or at least through the afternoon, and then he could have them rest. I did tell him, as it is YS last yr to believe, that if he wanted to be here Christmas morning he was welcome.<p>I don't know his plans, he won't commit to anything. His comment it all makes him sad. Well this is what he wanted

But what killing, is not the fact my children won't be home on Thanksgiving, it is the fact that they will be spending a holiday with the OW. The person who broke up my family gets my children. I can't stand the fact that she & her family (that have aided her in her pursuit of my STBX) will be with my children. [img]images/icons/mad.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/mad.gif" border="0[/img] <p>How do you deal with this? [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]<p>[ November 07, 2001: Message edited by: sing ]</p>

The Holidays....<p>I don't know how its gonna be. My exh hasn't said as of yet. Prior to him leaving, he stated family and the hoildays were not important to him. I really don't know if he'll have his wh**e around or not. <p>Last year he cooked breakfast at his apt for the kids. I made a meal that night. It was quiet. I live 1200 miles from home. I was tearful... knowing that is wasn't suppose to be that way.<p>This year.... I jsut wait to see how things work out. Don't know if I'll be happy or sad.
For thanksgiving I'm buying one of those dinner all together and cooked. <p>Its just not the same..........<p>s

Been wondering the same thing. Since my family has been celebrating Thanksgiving the day after for years, and Christmas on New Year's Day, I've given H Thanksgiving Day and Christmas Day. At least I'll have my son for the days that are most important to me. In fact, when we were a family, if you want to call it that, we always celebrated Christmas on the 23rd or 24th because we always went to my in-laws for Christmas. <p>So, what do I do? Some people have suggested my spending the holidays with other family members. Sure, make me feel worse by seeing their happy families, and make me miss my son even more; and intruding on their family time? I don't think so.<p>There is one thing I'd thought of, and maybe it would be an idea. My dad died several years ago, and my mom didn't know what to do with herself on the holidays, so she volunteered at places like a soup kitchen - where they serve a holiday dinner to homeless or low-income families. Anyway, for now, that's what I'm thinking about doing. Doing something for somebody less fortunate than myself.<p>Just an idea.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by So Very Confused:
<strong>There is one thing I'd thought of, and maybe it would be an idea. My dad died several years ago, and my mom didn't know what to do with herself on the holidays, so she volunteered at places like a soup kitchen - where they serve a holiday dinner to homeless or low-income families. Anyway, for now, that's what I'm thinking about doing. Doing something for somebody less fortunate than myself.<p>Just an idea.</strong><hr></blockquote><p>I had thought about doing the same. I am going to school, so I plan Thanksgiving break to try and finish most of my work, if not all. <p>I just hate that my sons will be with the @#@#@#@ OW.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by So Very Confused:
<strong>...so she volunteered at places like a soup kitchen - where they serve a holiday dinner to homeless or low-income families. Anyway, for now, that's what I'm thinking about doing. Doing something for somebody less fortunate than myself.
Just an idea.</strong><hr></blockquote><p>I think this is an excellent idea. For 7 years my kids and I worked with a program for less fortunate kids at Christmas - and it really opened their eyes to how blessed their lives are when some kid their own age was asking for underwear for Christmas.<p>At this stage my kids, 15 and 18, are basically refusing to spend time with their father. They've lost all respect for him - he's lied to them, too, and they've caught him at it. It's really sad that he has done this to himself, though I'm sure he blames it all on me. (I must have forgotten about giving him permission to mess around elsewhere...!) I don't even know if they'll acknowledge him with a gift at Christmas. They completely ignored his birthday, which occurred 11 days after he walked out, and he had the balls to try to shame them for ignoring it - even though he spent it with his gf. <p>We're spending Thanksgiving with good friends who also don't have any family nearby.<p>My kids and I are going to create new TRADITIONS for our family this holiday season. I don't want to be thinking about what we did with him - because we're going to do it differently, just the 3 of us. And it's going to be wonderful and special and memorable.<p>I don't think it really matters so much when or where we spend it - if we remember to concentrate on the positives in our lives. They can be hard to find, but if you look hard enough you'll find them. We have our health and the love of our children and the strength and capability to survive.

soup kitchen that is nice but just come to my house in Temecula CA. I will cook I am in the same boat me and my 10 year-old daugher. So join me BYOB.<p>P.S. I do give to people in need, that is how I live not a few times a year but many.<p>[ November 11, 2001: Message edited by: ronnb ]</p>