h got married at 25 and a couple of months later the child came.i agree that was pretty early.but does that make it right to cheat on w all along.<p>yrs later divorce your wife in your mind and start dating?and then the final wham-o was when he left w and daughter and moved in with ow whom he works with. <p>never once did he come to me and say he wasn't happy in the marriage.he just did what he wanted.on certain nights he didn't even return home.what kind of example is that to our child?child even knows he lives with ow(child is only 6)<p>he faked coming back to work things out that only lasted 6 wks.again do you do something so deceitful especially when such a young child is involved.and then had the nerve to say he didn't know how that would affect the child.shouldn't she have been his first thought when he devised his "plan"?<p>now he says he is ready for a serious relationship but he just doesn't feel he wants it with me. we were together 10 yrs/married for 7 and part of him grew bored.he cheated throughtout the marriage.and if someone was "changed"wouldn't tthey want to try to work things out with their w ffirst,before giving that to someone new?<p>especially since he was the one to make things bad between us (by cheating)how could he be so changed and not for a minute want to try to make things better between us.<p>i think its because he really hasn't changed and its to sad that he and ow don't even know it.<p>pls post i would like as many responses as possible.<p>i don't understand why someone wouldn't at the very least try to look at marriage as more than a dating relationship and try to give it a chance.<p>instead he is just saying ok its time we hurry up and get divorced(we've been separated 10 months)
when we were separated 5/6 months i suggested we divorce and he said he wanted to wait and see.now he is very much in a rush.

((((leftalone))))<p>Dear, I can totally relate to your resentment, pain, and quest for answers for I have been there. Unfortunately, the only person who can answer any of your questions about your husband&#8217;s actions is your husband and while his head is surrounded by fog he will not face his guilt. These are questions that he will deal with at some point in his life and you may never know what the answers are.<p>As I stated once before, by coming home for a while under false pretences he did a lot of harm to your precious 6yo daughter. My heart bleeds for the hurt and confusion that she must be faced with.<p>About his relationship with Ms. OW, you know as well as I do that won&#8217;t work and if it does it&#8217;s only because each of them has decided to put up with misery.<p>I know that this seems impossible right now but it is time for you to become pro-active instead of re-active. What your husband did and what he is doing now you have no way of controlling or even understanding. How you and your daughter get on with your lives is totally in your hands. Believe me I know how much this sucks but for your sake as well as that innocent little girl you have to trudge through all this to get you both to a healthier and happier place.<p>I don&#8217;t know if you&#8217;re a religious person or not but I&#8217;m going to offer a couple of things. I pray that the hands of God will surround your family and carry you through this time of tribulation. I pray that you will seek refuge under the wing of God until this storm passes. I pray that God will provide your husband with vision and that he will see and at least become a father.<p>Hugs, Thoughts, & Prayers

just wanted to bump myself up