Dear,
I missed your post on my thread cause the last answers were long ago.
In the meantime I posted to your threads.<p>Like I said, we are like twin sisters, unfortunately. Except you are probably much younger with more future chances.<p>I agree with you after acceptance comes peace, but I stll can't accept. Maybe it's simple jellousy, maybe it's no more love (like my OD says), maybe it's co-dependency (what dr Harley says does not exist)....<p>Now I know I'll survive (my suicide attempt failed - one more thing I can't do right), I know i changed, him also, but I can't see good changes neither in me nor in him.<p>I became more nervous, I have much more problems living alone with kids and without his help (moral, physical, financial..), <p>Above all I feel so lonely without him, if only we quarreled or had obvious problems during some time in the marriage, at least me was not aware of him being unsatisfied and feeling unloved , he said now for more than 15yrs.<p>Now everyone arround me is smart and says to me that I was cold, I didn't love him enough, I forced him into OW's arms, I was the reason.<p>he was perfect and IS perfect, he deserves happiness, she is much better for him, finally he will have "wanted" child, fnally he has a woman who dedicated herself to him not to house, kids, science....and when you listen that so long you accept the guilt.<p>I still wait them to marry, it is going to be soon, and I still can't accept that he didn't ever tried to correct , talk, repair the marriage, that it was easier to destroy everyone and everything and start again with her.<p>He never ever allowed to make jokes about the marriage (daughters called him dinosaurus) and in a few months completely new thoughts about life and even kids ( I will notsacrifise the future cause of them, i do not have past only future, OW cares too much about kids they are nt hers, I wouldn't do that in her position, OW is the only love of my life, you forced me to marry you with a baby......)<p>It does not seem truth to me what WFH says:
"she represents his giving up all that responsibility and committment...she might not be so attractive if she is pregnant...and the additional burden of a baby...(that neither of them are prepared for) might be a harsh reality break".
<p>
He does not seem happy but he IS happy and WILL BE happy, and I know I can't be happy without him.<p>Your daughters are young and they need you, but my are much older and love him more, cause he is not nervous, has fun, has money, enjoys the life, they do not need me.<p>I'll think of you this Sat and in spite of being an atheist will pray for you.<p>Love<p>[ December 07, 2001: Message edited by: betrayed and desperate ]</p>