We have filed for divorce, but no support has been set up yet, he has been giving me a set amount every week, until he spent 1,000.00 on himself and his married girlfriend, and gave me a bunch of bull**** that he had bills to pay! <p>He lives with his parents and has very few bills.

Now knowing that out of all the months of the year this is when I need extra money, he has been giving me less then I need, which is gonna destroy my Xmas. <p> All I do is work hard and take care of my Kids and all he does is party and spends money that his family needs. I just don't understand ? How can he take from his children that he professes to love.

<small>[ August 08, 2004, 11:24 PM: Message edited by: laura_lee ]</small>

My H lives with parents, no bills, money H gives us is from his Navy retirement, H has new state parole officer job, all thats free & clear $27,000 for AL. & says doesnt have any money, trying to kept MOW up to her standards of living buying for her & her kids, her H made more money, I have no money left over after paying bills for xmas for our son much less my family members, H knew it took retirement ck plus H job to cover the bills, we havent saved a dime in 4 years since H got out of the navy. Im not sure how any person can sleep at night knowing what they put their family thur, it took 17yrs for me to see H is a very cold selfish person who only cares about himself.
M-17yrs
D-pending
C-12,28, GD-7yrs old
MOW-M-10yrs
MOW-D-pending
C-small

I took me 17 years to find out the exact same thing about my H. cold-heart selfish spoiled rotten brat that he is....<p>Take care and God Bless.<p>PP

That is exactly my point, and I have asked him how he sleeps at night, knowing that your children are doing without, while your partying it up, The selfishness has taking over everything it seems that he is blind to what he has done to me, our family, our marriage and now he seems to want to destroy the children. I wanted to try and keep some kind of relationship with him, because of the children, but he is getting worse,and now he makes me sick to my stomach knowing he has blown $1000 in the last month on himself. I can't even begin to understand how he does the things he does, but for my own health I asked him not to call me unless it has to do with the children.
He lives with his parents and has no expenses, but a few minor personal bills, that he is not even paying. <p> This is my only comfort--<p>He who forsakes the children for their own gain forsakes themselves and will be destined to eternal damnation. (in the bible)<p>There is always a price to pay.<p>God Bless and Have a Happy and Blessed Holiday !

Whoa! Sounds like we have some very angry people posting here....<p>I speak from experience, my husband left me for a girl the same age as my eldest son, and I later found out he had been cheating throughout our marriage. When he left I had a 5 yr. old hyperactive boy and a job that couldn't pay the bills. He gave me money at first, but that swiftly dwindled to nothing and then he disappeared. We haven't seen him for three years at Christmas.<p>However, just being angry helps no one, especially the person who is angry. Some people like our exes, for whatever reason, just don't do what they ought to do, and we cannot change them. My ex has chosen to disappear and now I get no Child Support, but I don't have to involve myself with arguing and fussing with him to act right. He wasn't "acting right" when he had was unfaithful, why do I expect him to act right in other areas of his life?<p>However, you can at least have the government on your side to force them to at least financially support their children. Stop arguing with the ex and go to whatever state organization handles Child Support, and sue for as much as the law allows. <p>Right now mine is on the run and not paying any Child Support, but I have peace of mind knowing I don't have to fight for that and he will be found eventually. Besides, I truly believe that God takes care of my financial needs and He always does, regardless of whether ex is paying or not...

Hi there-<p>I have to say I agree with Deb. As rational people we can't begin to understand where they are coming from, but we can protect ourselves. Get your child support legally established. Until you do you have no protection over things like this and that is no way to live. <p>My own WH always puts himself first. He needs recognition for everything he does and is constantly letting us know how broke he is etc. yet he has very few bills and hardly any responsibility. He blows all his money on booze, gambling, and the OW. To me it is very irritating, but like Deb said anger really eats away at the person who is angry so let it go. I try my best to live my own life and don't depend on him. <p>They will all get there's eventually, unfortunately it never seems to be as fast as we would like it. <p>Protect yourself, take control of you, and let your WH go about his screwed up business. You will be better off in the end.<p>K

Thanks , <p>I know it is not healthy for me to be angry, and I am dealing with that, I went to file for support, but could not get it because he had filed paperwork for divorce, so after the Holiday I have to see a lawyer and put it all behind me. It just doesn't seem fair that they do everything to destroy the family and run off like children.<p> I am working hard to get to the point where I will need nothing from him and that will be the sweetest day, and I will be truly free.<p>Thanks you all