This is going to the the first Christmas I have spent apart from my STBXH since 1983. Even though it is best that we are divorcing, I am feeling rather sad about waking up Christmas morning and opening gift with our children with out him here.<p>I am even sadder because he has not asked me if I need money to help with their Christmas. Other people have been helping me and for that I am truely blessed and grateful - but if saddens me more that he has not even asked about them.<p>How have any of you dealt with not having your X with you for the holidays?<p>Beth

I am dealing with that this year. We have been married for 21 years. My H was a pilot in the military. He retired in 2000 and started flying with the airlines. He had had affairs before. They were always devastating. But we survived them and moved on. He had a year of probation in the airlines...financially it was bad for us and physically, he wasn't home for one holiday, one weekend or for a vacation. I work full time and have 4 active kids. I just tried to keep my head above water that year. Well, he decided that he needed passion in his life---and had a number of one night stands with crew members. Last Feb. he met a flight attendant who sounds a little like a sl** and they fell madly in love. In April he moved out and has revised all of our history and now says that I was this blah, blah, blah,. It is very sad.<p>Christmas was such a special time for us. We loved putting the lights up, cutting down a tree, baking and having the huge dinner with all the food. We loved to watch "Mr. McGoo's Christmas Carol". It is empty without him here. And even tho he has been such an awful person to me this year---I miss him and being with our family. The kids and I have been trying to carry on and move on---but this has definitely been our most dismal Christmas. Take Care!!

I spent time with my mother and sister this Christmas. This is also my first Christmas away from my stbx and it hurt like heck. My family was very supportive.