My husband and I have been a couple for 10 years. Of those ten years, we have lived together for 6 and have been married for 1. I feel very blessed; we have a great relationship, and after 10 years together, are still best friends and have a very physical relationship. The only problem is that he is not very verbal with his affectionate feelings. He has no problem stating when something is bothering him or if he has a criticism, but it would be nice if he could balance that with an occasional compliment or an "I love you" (which he NEVER says). I have told him many times that<BR>even though he DOES many nice things for me, I still need to also HEAR these sweet nothings from him. But he says that that's the way he is and that it doesn't feel natural to say those types of things. I don't want to change his essence, but I also believe that verbal stroking is very important in a relationship. I have tried everything in the book and believe me, I set a good example. But I just don't get it in return. Any suggestions, or do I just resign to being satisfied with the "actions speak louder than words" theory? Thanks!<BR>

i think you're lucky for him being as good as you say, yes of course we all need to hear those great words but some people are less verbal than others. i'm like that. i hardly talk but my actions are mostly good. <BR>I think as long as he's good to you and he makes you happy then that's what counts!!!<BR>hapiness is the key to living!!

Thanks for responding Live2BHappy! Don't get me wrong -- I know he's a good guy, but really -- since we're in it for the long haul, it would be nice to once in a while hear that my husband finds me sexy or that that I look nice or that he loves me. I'm not kidding - he NEVER says these things. I mean, isn't it nice to feel special once in a while, to be TOLD that you are? I think everyone needs that. I don't expect flowery monologues -- just a simple declaration now and then.

I understand where you're coming from my girlfriend at the time used to me the same thing Like I said I was the non-verbal one for a while. But remeber actions speak louder than words how many people say Ilove you to their spouses everyday and then walk out the door and see somebody else!! I have an idea have you tried for you if you haven't tried it already it worked for me----If and when he tells you I love you or another special phrase take him out to dinner or get him a small gift he'll be surprised that your doing all this because for saying I love you -- I know I did and thats when she responeded that HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO ME!!- I changed for a while after that because i figured if she's going to all this trouble it's because it's important for her. Hope this works!! <BR>Thanks for you response i added more information to my message to help you --HELP ME!!!

Thanks for your advice! I'll give that a try. I also added more to your post.....