Need all your prayers for strength. My H and I have agreed to use one attorney (a man I worked for for 5 years) to handle our D. We have no real assets, except our home, which we are selling and splitting the profits 50/50. We agree on custody, child support, virtually everything (although, I wasn't ready to give up on our M, H is deeply in "love" with OW).<p>I just need some strength to get through this first meeting without falling apart and crying. He's so tough right now, nothing seems to phase him. My tears, though fewer and farther between, seem to do nothing but annoy him. I cannot understand how, at the beginning of October, he told OW I was the love of his life, and he'd spend the rest of his life making this whole mess up to me -- and now he looks at me as if he must have been CRAZY to ever be with me.<p>Please just pray for me to have the strength to get through all of this.<p>Thanks, friends!<p>MOM

Dear MOM,<p>I'm sooooo sorry for the pain this year has been for you. Understanding how and why the WS does what he does can truely drive you crazy. There just isn't an explanation....except that they are in a big time fog.<p>I will say a prayer for you during this time. My STBXH and I will be using one attorney too and while most days I feel pretty good, actually having to DEAL with the details of a divorce hasn't happened yet, so who knows how I'll feel. I too hope I can hold it together.<p>Just be strong and don't let him manipulate you in any way emotionally, to not get what you at least deserve. You have to really be looking out for you right now, because no one else will be. <p>Just remember....you didn't cause this and in no way should you have to pay for it. Yes, there may have been problems in your marriage...but you WS choose to solve those problems my leaving, again and again. That is not a mature choice nor one made by a person who has you best interest at heart. He is only out for himself right now. So you gotta be your own strength. <p>Keep the faith and let us know how it goes.
Aloha,
Ms.O

My thoughts and prayers to you MoM.<p>God Bless.

Hi Myownme,
I have and will continue to pray for you. I will also pray that our Lord will be with you every step of the way.
God Bless You,

MOM - You have my prayers. I believe I'll be joining you shortly..<p>Listen, I've heard the divorce process is adversarial by nature.. if the goal is to save money would mediation be a better strategy?<p>I think if you love someone, your actions show it. You may find yourself accommodating him in a way that really isn't in your best interest..<p>My .02, for what it's worth..<p>
<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>I just need some strength to get through this first meeting without falling apart and crying. He's so tough right now, nothing seems to phase him. My tears, though fewer and farther between, seem to do nothing but annoy him. <hr></blockquote><p>Ya, the tough, annoyed WS ticks me off...<p>God bless you, MOM, w the strength and support you need to get through this mess.<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Just be strong and don't let him manipulate you in any way emotionally, to not get what you at least deserve. You have to really be looking out for you right now, because no one else will be. <p>Just remember....you didn't cause this and in no way should you have to pay for it. Yes, there may have been problems in your marriage...but you WS choose to solve those problems my leaving, again and again. That is not a mature choice nor one made by a person who has you best interest at heart. He is only out for himself right now. So you gotta be your own strength.<hr></blockquote><p>Ya, a wise woman. Don't give away your power. He does not share the beauty of your dream..<p>Dan

Thanks everyone! I really appreciate the support. I'm still afraid, but God (and my friends here) will get me through this. It's a new year and a new life for me!! God's peace and blessings to all of you!<p>MOM

MOM - I wanted to let you know I was thinking of you this morning..<p>Better things are ahead for you; this is the path to the good things you deserve.<p>Prayers for your strength, wisdom and patience today. God is with you...<p>Dan

Thank you {{{Dan}}}!
I pray for better things ahead for you as well. Our appointment got changed to 4:00 today. I was a little weepy last night; didn't let my H see though. He gave me a hug, but it really feels like pity at this point; I don't think I'll let him do that again...it's so hard, because I still love him; well, not actually the "him" that he is now, but the man that I lost...then most times I can't even look at him anymore. That's hard.<p>Thanks again for thinking of me, I really appreciate the prayers. If you can, say a prayer that our house will sell today, o.k.? We've got a second showing, and it would really be better if the house sells before I move out on February 2.<p>My thoughts and prayers are with you also, Dan!<p>Kari