Hi.<BR>First of all, you might try posting this in the Emotional Needs forum. You might get more repsonses there.<P>Anyway, I'm truly sorry for the anguish you are feeling right now. Your wife's lovebank is at a major negative balance right now, and the thought of continuing in this state is most unappealing to her, so I can understand why she would think divorce is the only option.<P>However, it's not. And with two young children to consider, I hope she can reflect on the alternatives available. Please read through this entire site and print out articles for your wife to read. Ask for a grace period before she files for divorce, to allow her time to soak in all of the information.<P>Most importantly, SHOW your wife how badly you want a relationship with her. You can do this by supporting the things that make her happy (such as horseback riding). She probably feels resentful that you were not available to her most of your marriage, and when she finally found something that made her feel good about herself, you chose not to be supportive of it. Maybe you can learn more about her horseback riding and make it a hobby together. Or if horses aren't your thing -- find something you can both enjoy doing together. That's a great way to build love for one another! Remember, it's your time away from each other that got you to this point. <P>Whatever you do, live by the actions speak louder than words theory, and SHOW her that you understand that she has felt neglected for so long. Don't make your career and studies more important than her own outside interests -- be supportive of the things she loves too and you will see her and your love for eachother flourish.<P>Good luck!
