I was a happily married woman until my husband told me he did not want children. After discusing this, we decided to have one. I had my daughter 15 months ago and when she was born, we found out she has Down Syndrom. My husband became very withdrawn and I had guilty feelings that I had given my husband a "not normal" child. Since then, we have had problems that we are trying to overcome. We have both overcome the feelings of raising a child with a disability,and quite truthfully, I would not trade her for anything. But I have emotionally moved on without my husband. Our friends think that there are deeper problems that might stem back to when he was a child, but he will not open up to me. He even believes that there is "no problem" at all. Now everyday, I am in a deep depression. I have it in my mind that I want to leave, but don't know how to. My husband is a great husband and a wonderful father, but he does nothing for me emotionally. I am fighting the fact that I want my daughter to have a sibling to help her through life and have the feeling of a family, but I do not want to bring a child into this world if my world will be as a single mother.
Help, I am at my wits end.<p>Monique

Do you have any support groups for children with disabilities in the area? Check your yellow pages--if not see what you have to do to start one. You will be amazed at how many people need the same type of advice, friendship and just someone to throw ideas off of
.<p>I think having a handicapped child puts a strain on most marriages. And working with people that have been through some of the experiences you are having helps tremendously. <p>If not, try to find a counselor who will help you locate some services--there are many out there. Take care...I think with some support you will discover that your daughter brings such joy to you life, challenges too--but tons of love..Best wishes

Monique,<p>I know absolutely nothing about raising a Downs child but I have watched the strains it put on my sisters life.<p>Her and her husband have 4 children and the middle 2 have Downs. After the birth of her first Downs baby my sister went into a deep depression that basically lasted for 6 years, which was when her last child was born.<p>During that time her marriage went totally stail. Many times the thought of divorce was brought up. Finally she was able to exept her circumstances and since then her marriage has been wonderful. I will say that my Brother-In-Law could of left at any time and no one would of blamed him but he didn't. He stood by her in sickness and in health and today I envy the relationship they have.<p>Hugs, Thoughts, & Prayers