|
|
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 4,416
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 4,416 |
God's Survey<p>After having been commissioned by God to take a survey of how man was doing on Earth, St. Peter now stood before his boss ready to present his findings. "Tell me, St. Peter, what have you found out?" God asked.<p>"I'm very sorry to have to tell you this, but the people are behaving in a sinful manner. There's drugs, alcohol, murders, you name it -- a regular Sodom and Gomorrah. But the worst is this new obsession with oral sex. According to my survey, 88% of the population is doing it. Even four out of five dentists recommend it. I'm afraid it has reached epidemic proportions."<p>"Hmm," God said thoughtfully, "Do you have any recommendations as to what should be done to put an end to this sexual perversion?"<p>"I think we should send a message to everyone on Earth who engages in oral sex. The contents of that message should tell them exactly what will happen to them on Judgment Day if they do not stop this type of activity," replied St. Peter.<p>"That is an effective solution," God stated, "but I think that instead of punishing those who practice oral sex, we should reward those who refrain from it. Let's send a letter that's personally signed by me to each one of these good people." And so they did.<p>Do you know what the letter said? (scroll down)<p> No? (scroll down a little more)<p> Hmm...You didn't get the letter either, huh?? [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/blush.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img]
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 1,690
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 1,690 |
You are BAD.<p>I didn't get the letter either. [img]images/icons/blush.gif" border="0[/img]
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150 |
Maybe I should go and check my mailbox? Nah, I don't guess so. [img]images/icons/blush.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Well, if you have nothing better to do than read this thread, check this out:<p> http://www.keebler.com/office/importan.htm
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 4,416
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 4,416 |
PERFECT BREAKFAST<p>You're sitting at the table and... Your son is on the cover of a Wheaties' box. Your Mistress is on the cover of Play..boy. And your wife is on the back of the milk carton.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 147
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 147 |
<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by cinderella: <strong>Maybe I should go and check my mailbox? Nah, I don't guess so. [img]images/icons/blush.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Well, if you have nothing better to do than read this thread, check this out:<p> http://www.keebler.com/office/importan.htm</strong><hr></blockquote><p> OMG, I need to get a life. I actually went and read the link. Very cute, pass the fudge!<p>I've been lurking most of the day. Its my one year anniversary of H wanting a divorce. Had great plans for the day, but history hit me in the face [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Dara
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 4,416
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 4,416 |
<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Still Learning As I go: <strong>Had great plans for the day, but history hit me in the face [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Dara</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Wish I could be there for ya today but I'm getting ready to go into a meeting to get my butt chewed on and then I have to go get the kids....<p>Please know that you're in my Thoughts & Prayers....
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
|
0 members (),
273
guests, and
28
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,659
Posts2,323,613
Members72,372
| |
Most Online9,682 May 13th, 2026
|
|
|
|