I'm sure you all know my story, It is much the same as yours. I have read many posts and they all point ot the same thing. Broken marriages, bad descisions, kids, in-laws, and prayer. My big concern is, after she decided to file for divorce and moved her new man into our house, should I still answer the phone when she calls? I would love to have her back, I feel that God's will in our marriage is for us to be back together. Should I let her call me and act really nice toward me when she betrayed me? Or, should I let her know that if she REALLY needs to talk, that she can leave a message and I might call back? What is the difference between "Plan B" and "She came home at 6:00AM and I was really p!ssed off and tipped the mattress to get her out of bed. Later, she called the cops and complained about "domestic abuse" Well, I'm sure that many of you have been in my situation, in fact, about 80% of you have (statistics are usually right aren't they?) The "OM" thing." Should I let her call? I've read that the "WS" might do this to keep the "connection alive" Is this a chance to implement a "Faux Plan-A" while being forced into a "Plan-B"? What is going on????? I hate it.

While this may sound crazy, chasing her pushes her further away,your unhappiness reminds her shes glad she's got away because she's sad, your greatest victory will be moving on, stop begging and start letting her go, thats to say let her fall if she's doing wrong and let her be responsible, you know PRIDE comes before the fall, that they have...sure you care, sure you love her and want to protect her and pray for her...and bi-golly she knows it too. When she see's that you are moving on and begin to start living your life and work on you and do the things that make you happy, all the joy you have is going get her attention, remember you're no fun, you're boring in her eyes..[not true] though about you. Whatever she said about you why she left, work on those and stand on those things and realize she either made you that better man or she just set you up later down the road for [A better mate, Hope you can return to your wife, that would be nice]...soon she will see you wasnt all her problem....<p>She has baggage and so does this new guy in her life, IF you talk to her keep it short and joyful its going start to confuse her, meaning, humm... my security anchor is getting away from me, he sounds like he might be getting out of my security realm of control....See she feels she has your heart and the OM's...She says yea I want this new guy he can supply me this, but I also want my husband he can supply me this..Believe me she is not a happy woman right now..<p>I remember when my wife would be so depressed some days in secret she couldnt get out of the bed to go to work, the guilt was so heavy. They the WS are so tormented its unreal but they appear happy. My wife told a friend one time, you know I appear happy and strong to him but I am a miserable person, look what I have done....But still she never stopped they're like an addict.....Even after 6 guys my wife stll thought about putting the marriage together, but thats because I prayed, worked on me and moved on, After I moved out of state she said " why did you leave me? "Why did you betray me"..."How could do such a thing"?why,why,why?...Now I was shocked, I was speechless, I surly thought she wanted nothing to do with me, come on she was with the other MEN (6)..I thought she was happy and living the life, she never called, if I did see her it was, I would go to hug her and she's say don't touch me please and well I have things to so therefore you need to leave after a 30 min visit after not seeing her for 3 weeks or a month, and she loved doing that to me because she felt she had power over my emotions.....Trust me I felt rejected big time.<p>Of late after I moved 1,500 miles away 7 months later, guess what she's pondering, yep, moving in the same city as me, secretly internet Job searching..even though she filed for Divorce Oct 2001, not final yet. She said she was moving this summer but didnt say where, but I know her and she's given slip ups like she looking this way. She always says, "well I hope you become that successful man you always wanted be, I can tell its already happening in your life"....As you see my success is attractive to her thats one of the many elements why she fell in love with me in the first place, it turns her on and it will always be there, thats why she can't let me go.<p>Therefore hang in there, to get her attention is to move on, but don't waste you life doing it, nobodys that important.

Please visit www.restorem.org. It may be helpful to you. And I will be praying for you.
Morriggs
morriggs@yahoo.com