Wow, I can't believe this thread is still going on, but then most anything is believable now a days with this e-lec-tron-ic age we live in!!!<p>Thinker, SNL, is any of this helping you two at all??? Do either one of you really read any of these posts or are you both just mechanically going through the motions and not letting any of these insights that others are so gererously giving sink in?? And why hasn't the word LOVE come up....or the word FORGIVENESS been addressed by the two of you, together??<p>I thought I read something earlier about children being a part of this marriage....does anyone care about them??? Man, all I am reading here is a bunch of diatribe that can be summed up in one word.........SELFISHNESS!!<p>Come on guys, get off the high horse and do something deep, something meaningful with your lives! Get your marriage back into shape and stop all this hogwash that I am reading posted here for the world to see. I wonder now if Thinker and SNL aren't just doing this to get an audience for thier pitiful lives together and all of us remain here just to be nosey looky-lou's who are getting a thrill out of it all!<p>Man, someone in this marriage please, please do the right think before it is really toooooooooooo late!
And for pete's sake would someone please look up the word HUMBLE and post the definition....I am too weak from my own frustration to do it!<p>[ February 02, 2002: Message edited by: frstrtd ]<p>[ February 02, 2002: Message edited by: frstrtd ]<p>[ February 02, 2002: Message edited by: frstrtd ]</p>

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by thinker:
<strong>
Thinker did something for herself. Thinker did some investigating on the OW. There is this need to end her in my mind and thoughts. Told SNL about what Thinker did. Found through calls that the OW and her husband sold their house and moved. No forwarding address at this time. Found what they sold their house for, and the realtor gave me the cell phone of the agent that sold the house. Realtor told me the terms, said they had immediate occupancy on the listing, house in excellent repair, decorated beautifully, big kitchen, 3 bedroom, 2 bath home, nice yard, mature trees, and new windows, with A/C. Realtor said the house in quite nice in the pictures listed. And the house is taken over by the new owners. Maybe I am obsessed, but I need to put an end to this sexual, affair obsessed woman.
[ February 02, 2002: Message edited by: thinker ]</strong><hr></blockquote><p> Uhh, is it just me or does this(especially that last sentence) seem especially worrisome to anyone else. This almost is bordering on stalking behaviour. Thinker, what is Heaven's name are you doing??? What do you mean put an end to her?? What is going on in your head.
This is very scary.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Nduli2:
<strong><p> Uhh, is it just me or does this(especially that last sentence) seem especially worrisome to anyone else. This almost is bordering on stalking behaviour. Thinker, what is Heaven's name are you doing??? What do you mean put an end to her?? What is going on in your head.
This is very scary.</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Yes, I completely agree. Unfortunately, we seem unable to "DO" anything from this vantage point.<p>I have been very worried about these two for some time now. I have quoted (throughout this thread) the scenerio from The War of the Roses, because I can HONESTY see these two fighting right to the end... and I mean "to their deaths"...<p>MB has had it's share of people in deep, deep depressions, even those threatening to kill themselves. There seems to be no protocol for these situations, and we must sit here and simply watch (or try to reach out best we can as non-professionals)... I AM SPITTING ANGRY ABOUT THIS!<p>I know this is a PUBLIC board, but for crying out loud -- what are we suppose to be doing? It's like watching an accident? Do we "look away" and pretend it isn't happening? Would you do that in REAL LIFE? I am the kind of person who took my neighbor to the hospital when her H beat her up and paid dearly for it emotionally when she returned to her H and wouldn't speak to me for an entire year... would I do it again? Honestly, I think so... but I'm not sure. Is this what I've (we've) become?<p>Thinker - GET HELP!!!
SNL - Get your WIFE some help before she does something permanent that you'll NEVER be able to explain away.<p> [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img]

I have to agree with you, Nduli. I understand why Thinker would not have any positive feelings towards OW but the hatred she expresses is extreme. I suspect she is displacing a lot of the anger she feels towards SNL on the OW. From what she learned, it sounds like the OW is trying to start anew and Thinker should try and leave it at that. It also bothers me that when Thinker describes her investigation, she uses the third person, as if she is not responsible. This is a little more than venting, in my opinion.<p>[ February 02, 2002: Message edited by: Alizarin ]</p>

Thinker,<p>Because of other post you have written regarding your regrets of never telling OW H, I think what you are trying to say when you say "I need an end this sexual affair, obsessed woman" is because in your mind, you never told her husband about SNL, and you regret this. So you are wanting to contact OW's husband and tell him. <p>You are probably resentful because she still has her marriage but you don't have yours. Remember, you don't know what is going on with this lady, she is probably mental from some of the things the investigator told you. Her and her husband may even be splitting, this may be why their house is up for sale, you just don't know! It's time to LET IT GO.<p>It is time for you to put all this in God's hands and pray to God for the strength for you to forgive her. Do not contact her any further. This is now between you and SNL. If SNL wouldn't have found her, he would have found someone else. <p>Go for a walk today, clear your head and get it back together girl.<p>ANNA<p>[ February 02, 2002: Message edited by: Anna2000 ]</p>

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Alizarin:
<strong>It also bothers me that when Thinker describes her investigation, she uses the third person, as if she is not responsible. This is a little more than venting, in my opinion.<p></strong><hr></blockquote><p>I noticed this too... see the subject of the thread? Same thing!! Thinker is writing it as if she's writing about someone else. <p>I am VERY, VERY CONCERNED about these two. I keep coming back and hoping some GOOD news is here. <p>Listen to Anna!! Let this GO, thinker... before it destroys you completely!!!!!

VERY GOOD advice Anna has offered you, Thinker. Esp the part about if it wasn't this OW it possibly would have been someone else. The OW was a symptom. <p>So Thinker, please let it go, I do know how hard it is to do. I know how you hurt. I've experienced it too. It's a terrible burden to carry around in your head, it will eat you alive because you can't make it disappear. You can't change what has happened, all you can do now is let it go so it won't take anymore from you.<p>So many people here care, Thinker. And it's not like we haven't felt what you are feeling. Let us help you, listen to what we're telling you, Hon. Release yourself from the torture by leaving it behind and let it go. <p>Love,
Jo

I need to say a few things here methinks. This came as a surprise to me last night when she told me what she had done. We talked about it some, she was quite proud of her detective skills, and in that narrow sense, rightly so...she did a good job. I (like many of you) have (although my advice is somewhat tainted for obvious reasons) not enocouraged her to focus on the ow too much. Wanting to know stuff is understandable, but I think (and have told her this often) she has too much intensity, and that this is not emotionally healthy. However, her desire is not to seek out and do the ow in, but to locate them cause she wants to reveal stuff. She tried calling a while back and the phone was disconnected, that is what eventually prompted this. However, she has expressed on occassion an intent to do this in person, I have strongly objected to that intent....she thinks it is cause I protect ow, but it is not, it is cause I am protecting her.<p>You are correct about the displaced anger, as ow go, this one has bothered thinker very little, and not pursued me after we stopped...I suppose as affairees go, ones who actually liked each other, we have pretty much been model exop. I have focused on my life, she I assume on hers. Other than a legitimate committment to be sure the owh was notified, (depending on ones philosophy re such things) there is really little justification for thinkers behaviour. If I had to say, I would say her life has slipped from her control (me) and this is a means of control that gives her a feeling of stability.... The investigative efforts make her feel good (and are relatively harmless), I don't know that she would actually do anything though, unless provoked (she has a hard time with anger), and I do not intend to provoke thinker. However, she really needs to focus on herself, and I am not sure how much she is doing that, we don't talk much about substantive things. I know thinker's emotional well-being is very precarious now, I am not blind folks, or uncaring, but I can't make it right for her, she has to do that...I am just trying as best I can, not to be a bigger part of the problem than I already have been, and yes, as someone noted, this is all co-d stuff for the most part (for us both)...ending such paradigms is not easy at all.

snl,<p>If I lived close by and your wife were saying and doing the things she is (and I suspect it's MORE than what we read here, not less) I would be BEGGING her to seek help -- and let me take this a bit further, I would be PUSHING, if not DRIVING her someplace myself. I have done this for a friend in emotional crisis before!<p>Dammit snl, if you don't take care of this, WHO WILL? You are the ONLY one who CAN!!<p>I know thinker is an adult. I do. I know she is in control of herself, in theory. I see instead a VERY DAMAGED woman who is very near a NERVOUS BREAKDOWN. Are you just waiting? <p>I watched a very good friend spiril downward and end up in the psych ward. What a mess. <p>I would love to have you come back and say that you got off the f*&^%$g computer and put thinker in a car, and drove her to a doctor for help. All she'd have to do is begin to talk and I bet it would ALL come spilling out. <p>I know, I know, I'm gonna be called an enabler or something -- but sheesh -- DOESN'T SOMEONE HAVE TO HELP THIS WOMAN? For whatever reason, she seems UNABLE to help herself!

SNL,<p>Actually I don't understand totally why you think you need to step in...<p>I do think it's good you guys talk back and forth on post. However....Can't thinker talk for herself? Just a suggestion, but I think it would be better if you let her at least answer her very own post first. Have faith in her dealing with these post SNL, she can do it, I have faith...<p>ANNA

sheryl, we both have access to all the doctors we need, and thinker avails herself if she feels the need.,,<p>anna...step in? I am the other half of this, and I sure wasn't trying to speak for her, just felt a need to sorta defend her some.... and as to why we "talk" here, well in part, cause we don't talk to well in person...never have.

You all can calm down now. I am not going to do anything irrational. I do hate the OW with all the hate in this world. It is hard to understand how any man can love a woman who has no vows, no committment (except when things get tough), and does not mind having sex with anyone. According to her voicemails, she never told SNL she will leave her husband. She always told SNL that she will stay with her husband always. But SNL had sex with her anyway, he lusted for her and committed adultery. To this day, SNL does not say lust, or will not say adultery. I doubt he even thinks he committed sin. Cause if you read his posts, it is all the same stuff, it was biology. <p>Do you see where I am going nuts. There is no remorse, no guilt, no nothing about this affair. It is all justified for SNL, he feels this affair was the right thing to do. I would love to hear from SNL that yes everything was immoral, and lusting, and adultery. But I, also, know now that the OW is hiding from the truth. She is sick in her head. Why can she just live a normal life, like nothing happened? Why can she have fun with her kids and grandkids, and they know nothing about this sexual affair, and they don't know anything about her first sexual affair? Why doesn't someone, GOD, show this family that their mother, wife, grandmother, is a adulterer (2 times)? Now she can go on her merry way and pretend nothing happened, and pretend she has been this saint her whole life, and talk to her kids and grandkids about how God wants us to follow his path, and she has fallen off the path 2 times for sure, and possibly a third. <p>The reason I am wanting to do this so bad, is yes, I am JEALOUS and upset that she leads a normal life, and our family has been torn and the kids have been upset by what has happened. Plus the loss of money. This woman will live, and knowing that SNL dished out $3500.00 on this woman plus his bills, and she didn't pay one penny. How can a person live with this? How can a person pretend to conduct a normal life with committing adultery 2 times? I just cannot comprehend this womans mind. I can't comprehend SNL mind that he still loves this woman. I give up. SNL is not worth it, which I stated in earlier thread, and that is why the lawyer will be seen this week, plus my GYN for consultation and possibly a review of medication. So I will be the bad guy and have papers served to SNL.<p>But, in this case, what difference does it make? SNL has made up his mind, which all of you know, and nothing should come as a surprise. SNL knows what is going to happen, and he should of been already prepared for the separation. It takes one to start the process, it will be me, therefore, the kids will probably hate me, but someone has to do the dirty work, so I guess I will. Me the BS gets blasted by SNL having told me first about his affair, then 5 months later about him and OW having a sexual affair, then I get to be the one to start the process. Boy the WS seems to have everything going their way. Seems unfair, but life is not fair. PROVEN HERE!!!!!<p>Well post more later, thank you for your concern, I have not gone crazy to committ suicide, or kill anyone. I would not do that. But I have a problem with her - the OW and who is the next family she will destroy? According to the books and counselors, she will do it again, until she resolves her problems. If you listened to the tapes, it is all me, me, me. She didn't care one bit about anyone else. She said she didn't want to hurt her H, she doesn't want the truth to come out. She doesn't want her reputation ruined. This woman needs to be put in an institution, drugged up, and kept away from normal families. She is a threat to society, and marriages. See you for now.<p>[ February 02, 2002: Message edited by: thinker ]</p>

Do you see where I am going nuts. There is no remorse, no guilt, no nothing about this affair. It is all justified for SNL, he feels this affair was the right thing to do. I would love to hear from SNL that yes everything was immoral, and lusting, and adultery. <p>Thinker, what you need to understand with every fiber of your being, is that the only person you can control is yourself. You can't MAKE SNL say anything he doesn't want to say and if he finally does give in, it's a hollow victory. Forget about the other woman. Your best revenge is to live life well yourself and not let what happened destroy you.<p>It's of slight consolation to read that you don't plan on going off half-cocked and do something stupid but words are just words. I hope you really truely mean what you say.<p>I have to wonder where in all this does the death of your father fit. From all I've read, your relationship with him was incredibly close and your mother was absent emotionally for you. You must feel like you're losing everything that has ever meant anything to you....that it's all being taken away against your will. I know you feel like you can talk to you gynecologist but her job is being a Dr., not a psyhcologist. Try and find some help somewhere, Thinker. Admitting your weaknesses is strength.

There is a very, VERY FINE LINE between knowing when someone can take care of themselves and when the CAN'T. <p>I agree that we only control ourselves, but sometimes, when someone is MENTALLY OR EMOTIONALLY ILL, they CANNOT.<p>I'm sorry if this makes anyone else uncomfortable, but I take this VERY seriously OBVIOUSLY.<p>Also obviously, I have no business here (even though my posts are peppered throughout, because despite some real frustration, I CARE)...<p>thinker is going to turn into a bitter, hateful, self-punishing person and snl is happy to sit back and watch. Okay. I get it!

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by thinker:
<strong>Why doesn't someone, GOD, show this family that their mother, wife, grandmother, is a adulterer (2 times)?
</strong><hr></blockquote><p>
Thinker you are taking it out of God's hands and putting it in your hands. This is wrong. Put it back in God's hands where it belongs. Let God take care of this.<p>Ask yourself this...Who betrayed you OW or SNL? <p>You have to get over this bitterness, it is destroying you. You are letting SNL and OW win.<p>OW didn't make him spend the money, he chose to. It was him who betrayed you, not her, it was him who took money away from your family, not her. It was him who cheated on you, not her.<p>You don't know if this OW is being punished, you don't know what her life is like right now, but what you should be aware of is that God, God alone, handles this and you need to trust in him. Stop thinking she got by with this, she didn't. God will handle it. HAVE FAITH and drop this!<p>You are right when you say, what difference does it make, you are now filing for divorce. It makes no difference. You are finally ending this sick relationship you and SNL have.<p>You are right about life being unfair. God never promised us a great life on earth, only in heaven if we follow him. Are you being the kind of person God expects you to be during all of this?<p>Again, Thinker let this go, it will eat you up inside. Give it over to God.<p>Take care,<p>ANNA

Alizarin - I know inside that I have no one to talk to like I did with my father. I can't talk to my mother the same way. Yes, I am hurting inside with the loss of my father, who never degraded me. I have things I would like to talk to, concerns that I would like to talk to, and feelings of despair, that I talked to my dad about knowing he would not condemn me in any way. He understood my personality, him and I were on the same path, before this affair. I have lost the only person in my life that was kind to me 100%. My mother, even to this day, states things that are hard - like I am stupid or something. I sweep them away, and move on and say I know she is upset and needing comfort. I give her a hug, and say something nice. But deep inside I am hurting and would like someone to tell me you are my special daughter. My mother says, she loves me, which I know. I love her very much, but I don't like the harse words she says, when I tell her some things. Therefore, I am careful of what I say to her. My father, would talk to me when my mother was gone shopping or something. He held my hand, I rubbed his fingers with my fingers. I told dad you have soft caring baby blue eyes. We shared thoughts, and concerns. I knew that I could talk to my father, and he would be understanding and sometimes help with a direction in a kind way. He was a kind man, and thoughful. My mother and I cannot share thoughts, and some concerns. I talk to her about how I will survive, and she has said she will help me out. <p>Everyone, I heard what you guys said about let the OW go. I am going to try to, but I still feel like she really made out like a bandit. She will get her repentence in some way, hopefully the guilt will get to her soul and she will confess to her husband that she adultered again. I don't know why, but I do feel sorry for her kids that they have a mother who can't keep her legs together with other men. I feel sorry for her 2 granddaughters that they have a grandmother who is a sinner. She won't beable to with a clear mind beable to tell her granddaughters how to behave as young woman. How sex should be saved for your special man, and no one else. How is she going to tell them to be sacred to their husband, and to not go astray? She will have to tell them that she went astray twice and possibly a third time, before she can say with a straight face to be faithful.<p>As far as the money. Yes, SNL spent the money. But what about her, stating she doesn't have the money but didn't mind spending that amount of money in such a short time from us. She knew she was taking great amounts from us. She knew that I worked at the business, I see it as she really didn't care, she was getting her needs met, and at whatever costs was okay with her, as long as she didn't have to pay anything. SNL asked her to get a job, to pay for some of the bills, and she didn't. She talked about doing volunteer work, and she didn't. She used SNL, and SNL still doesn't see that. He bonded with her sexually, cause he said he proposed to her many times, and she said yes. But he tells me that she was never going to leave her husband, and he knew that. According to the e-mails, she was never going to leave her husband. Yet, he was bonding with her for what? No marriage, no future, no DLM in his life. What was the bonding, I see it as just a sexual pleasure. That is why she had her first affair, for sexual pleasure. Why did she choose to have sex in her first affair during her period, so she wouldn't get pregnant. SNL told me this. SNL told me many things about her that were quite sexual.<p>Anyways, I am going to get the book to read. Hope it will help me. Help me to get through this week. It is going to be difficult and stressful for me. Seeing the lawyer is not going to be fun. I will probably shake and roll. But maybe this will make me stronger, if I can get through it without tears. Will post later, SNL is all clean, took a shower and we are finally after 2 weekends going to the movies. I want to see 'The Beautiful Mind', I am reading the book, was hoping to have the book done before I saw the movie. Thanks for all your help. Thinker

...<p>[ February 03, 2002: Message edited by: Nduli2 ]</p>

To the previous poster.......What snl said was...<p>"However, her desire is not to seek out and do the ow in, but to locate them cause she wants to reveal stuff. She tried calling a while back and the phone was disconnected, that is what eventually prompted this. However, she has expressed on occassion an intent to do this in person, I have strongly objected to that intent....she thinks it is cause I protect ow, but it is not, it is cause I am protecting her"<p>She doesn't want to "kill" the OW.....she wants to tell her H. (in person) <p>Nevermind....just went back and saw that you said "occasionally" speaks of that. Well....I would be willing to bet that many BS have talked of a desire to "kill" the OP. I kinda think that is a natural rant. Granted .......Thinker does not seem to have progressed very much at all.<p>[ February 03, 2002: Message edited by: FinallyHappy ]</p>

Ya know.......what about THIS! I am becoming thoroughly disillusioned here. [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] Why don't we adhere more strictly to these theories.....and spend LESS time "picking sides" or something??? And before anyone suggests that I don't know this whole story.....blah, blah, blah...I have read this board religiously for over 2 1/2 years, and know exactly what's going on. BTW.....I love it and I think it has literally saved my life. but SHEESH. Neither party is following the theories of this site at ALL. <p>Thinker.....I wish you would drop the acrimony towards the OW for the time being and concentrate on your marriage for once. PLEASE! <p>SNL....I know you are an earnest man. But posting on Thinker's thread and then complaining that she promised not to read your posts is kinda.....well...you know. <p>anyway....sorry for the little rant. This is what I wanted to bring attention back to:<p>"Marriage partners do not necessarily experience the same state of mind in marriage at the same time. One spouse may disrupt the other's state of Intimacy by failing to meet an emotional need, or inadvertant thoughtlessness. In the state of Conflict, the offended spouse begins to complain, nag, and may even try to start a fight. As the complaints escalate, other spouse who has been in the state of Intimacy, is dragged into the state of Conflict as well, and then the fighting begins in earnest. <p>Typically, if they fail in their efforts to resolve the conflict, and if the unpleasant effects escalate, one spouse will go into Withdrawal first and raise his or her emotional barriers. The spouse that remains in the state of Conflict continues to argue, while the withdrawn spouse tries to escape. If the arguing spouse persists, the withdrawn spouse may be goaded to re-enter the Conflict state, and fight back. Or, the arguing spouse may give up and enter the Withdrawal state, too. <p>One spouse may also lead the other on the road back from Withdrawal to Conflict and eventually to back to Intimacy. In Withdrawal, a husband may decide to make a new effort to restore Intimacy and toss out an olive branch. That effort places him back into the Conflict state, while his wife is still in Withdrawal. <p>Suppose his effort is an encouragement to her and she eventually joins him in the state of Conflict. Now they are both willing to have their needs met by the other, but their Takers encourage them to fight about it, rather than negotiate intelligently and peacefully. In all too many cases, if they follow their Taker's advice and argue rather than negotiate, they both find themselves back in the state of Withdrawal, convinced that in that state their marriage is safer, and certainly more peaceful. <p>But this step from Withdrawal to Conflict is a step in the right direction, and provides spouses an opportunity to regain Intimacy -- if they can resist the advice of their Takers. Withdrawal may seem more peaceful, but it is actually a shuttering down of the marriage. A return to the state of Conflict is a sign that the partners have restored hope -- the marriage is worth fighting over. By coming out of Withdrawal, they are lowering their emotional defenses and taking the risk of getting close to each other again. <p>While demanding and arguing is instinctive in the state of Conflict, one spouse can lead the other back to Intimacy by resisting the Taker's temptation to fight. It takes two to argue, and if one spouse makes an effort to avoid making demands and judgmental statements, and tries to be thoughtful and meet the other's needs, the other spouse usually calms down and does the same thing. <p>Once they see each other's caring efforts, and rebuild their Love Bank accounts, they re-enter the Intimacy stage. But there's an irony that trips up some couples. Which spouse do you think is the first to move back into the state of Intimacy: the one who makes the first effort to meet the other's needs, or the recipient of that effort? You may have guessed it. The recipient of care is usually the first to return to the state of intimacy, and not the one who make the greatest effort to save the relationship. <p>If you set a good example by meeting your spouse's needs first, alas, that usually means that your own needs are met last. Your Taker is not pleased with this arrangement, and may try to sabotage it. You will need to make a deliberate and patient effort to override the Taker's instinct to retreat back to fighting and name-calling. But if you resist that instinct to argue, and instead focus attention on behaving thoughtfully and meeting your spouse's needs, your spouse will be encouraged to reciprocate. <p>Granted, when in the state of Conflict, it's much more difficult to be thoughtful and meet each other's emotional needs. That's because the Taker's advice dominates the Giver's advice, and the Taker isn't interested in thoughtfulness or meeting someone else's needs. So if you want to return to Intimacy, you must override this instinct with great effort. Meeting an emotional need in marriage is easy when you are in the state of Intimacy, because the Giver encourages you to do just that. But in the state of Confict, it seems very unnatural and even unfair. <p>When your Love Bank balances are finally restored, and your love for each other is triggered again, the struggle is over. You will have returned to Intimacy, and along with it, everything you need to do for each other will seem almost effortless. <p>The passage from Intimacy, through Conflict, to Withdrawal is a slippery slope. You can get there before you know it. But it takes quite a bit of work to climb back up that hill. While one of you can help by pulling the other back up the hill, it's a lot easier when you both work together. And the best way to work yourselves back to Intimacy from Withdrawal and Conflict is by negotiating effectively" <p>Heck.....why can't either one of you TRY this. All my best wishes to you both. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] one spouse can lead the other back to Intimacy by resisting the Taker's temptation to fight. It takes two to argue, and if one spouse makes an effort to avoid making demands and judgmental statements, and tries to be thoughtful and meet the other's needs, the other spouse usually calms down and does the same thing. <p>It just seems silly to move to divorce without EVER walkin' the walk and talkin' the talk that is MB!!!!!!!! Sorry.......backing out here [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] )))))) Peace to all.

Thinker,<p>I haven't read everything on this long saga but Thinker you are not the only one here with an OP in their lives. And from what I have read she is out of Snl live so therefore she is out of yours. So what if she was a slut, big deal. let it GO.<p>Snl is still with you for whatever reason I don't know. If you remember in SAA that the WS in there never would admit fault. If that is what you need from Snl I don't think you will ever get it. Either let it go or move on.<p>Thinker let it go. I was going to tell you how much better you have it than some of us, but what is the point. <p>ONLY YOU can heal YOURSELF at this point. Your angry does you no good. You are only hurting yourself and your children.<p>
Ya'll need help and I wonder if this board helps ya'll or enables the two of you.