W found emails of affair that I had with woman that I met off of the internet, with graphic details of the encounter, and plans to continue, she found this out 4 days after it happened. This came after she started to become suspicious because of my lack of interest for her. My internet chatting began in September as fun and ended up costing my marriage. What I need help with is she will not even consider anything but a divorce and we have been separated before 2 years ago and she moved in with a man that she had dated before she met me, and I took her back. Now I will admit that after doing the research and reading several affair books I have several issues that allowed me to do what I did, I acknowledge this and am working on these things daily. I have different emotions almost on a minute by minute basis, she has a order of protection against me and I cannot talk to her, I have been gone from the house now for 3 weeks and she has divorce papers for me when I go to get my stuff out next Saturday. I want to hear from the people out there who have divorced spouse without ever talking to their spouse because of the deception and lies that had to occur to pull it off, I feel like she will never forgive me and I hurt bad. She just wants to move on without talking to me at all, it is just over, oh and she wants me to give her money in order to do this, now I never ever wanted to leave my wife, this is evident in the emails that she read, now I know that I have issues that lead me to rationalize like that I think it is called serial affair.
ask for forgiveness?
D-Day 1/8/02
1/8/02 left house per the wife request
1/14/02 w filed ex parte against me because I did not leave the house immediately when she asked
1/24/02 judge granted order of protection against me for 1 year to have no contact with her
1/25/02 wife tells me that if I really loved her I would take divorce papers and get my stuff out of the house
married 3 years
I am 39 years old and have 11 year old son from first marriage this is my second
She 39 years old has 21 year son and 19 year old daughter from first marriage, this is her third marriage
I am in weekly counseling with my Pastor and reading books and posting here !