Well tonite, my stbx went out with his new girlfriend. He asked if my daughter could go to a hockey game with him. She wouldnt be home until midnight so i said she couldnt go. I had a feeling that if my daughter didnt go he was going to take his girlfriend. In fact he even told my daughter that he was taking the ow and her kids. So not only do i get replaced but now my daughter feels the same way. Why does it bother me? My daughter is crying herself to sleep. She is upset with me for saying no. My 3 year old son is screaming. Will it always be like this? The day they come back from a weekend at dads is so difficult. I just needed to vent. I feel like i am at my wits end. I feel helpless.i keep going to talk to the kids and calm them down and when i leave in 5 minutes they start again. Any advice. I feel overwhelmed and dont know what i can do for them.

I know this is extremely hard - especially when one parent won't be a parent, but acts more like a kid, and wants to be a buddy rather than a dad.<p>Take a deep breath - actually several deep breaths. Say a little prayer. Give your kids a big hug, and regroup.<p>It's hard to get things back into the routine, but try to set up some type of routine for these times so that they know what's going to happen when they get home, and then it's not so much that you are to blame.<p>It could be just giving them some down time and then dinner, baths, and a special time with stories and homework or a special time with your daughter after the 3 year old has gone to bed.<p>I am facing the same thing, with it only going to get worse - I have a 7 1/2 yearold, 6 yr old and 3 yr. old and one due 3/8/02. Court hearing to schedule custody is 2/26/02.<p>I'm hoping that we can get some sort of routine set with the visitation so that the kids will have some security and stability in their lives.<p>Hang in there. Mom's House Dad's House is a good book to read and well as Co-Parenting after Divorce. There are also web sites for moms that deal with these issues.<p>Most of all just close your eyes, take a breath adn let the kids know how much you love them, and know that It's not you.<p>K