Hunting Trouble<p>Don was so excited to be going bear hunting. He spotted a small Brown Bear in the woods and shot it. Then there was a tap on his shoulder; he turned around and saw a big Black Bear. The Black Bear said, "Don, you've got two choices, either I maul you to death or we have sex." Don decided to bend over.<p>He felt sore for two weeks, but Don soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip where he found the Black Bear and shot it.<p>There was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge Grizzly Bear was standing right next to him. The Grizzly said, "That was a huge mistake Don. You've got two choices. Either I maul you to death, or we have rough sex."<p>Again, Don thought it was better to comply. Although he survived, it took several months before Don finally recovered. Outraged, he headed back to the woods, managed to track down the Grizzly and shot it. He felt the sweet taste of revenge.<p>But then there was a tap on his shoulder. Don turned round to find a giant Polar Bear standing there. The Polar Bear said, "Admit it Don, you don't really come here for the hunting, do you?"
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THE ORGANIST<p>Miss Bea, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was much admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.
The pastor came to call on her one afternoon early in the spring and she welcomed him into her Victorian parlor. <p>She invited him to have a seat while she prepared a little tea. As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it, filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom. Imagine his shock and surprise. Imagine his curiosity! Surely Miss Bea had flipped or something!<p>When she returned with tea and cookies, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him, and he could resist no longer.<p>"Miss Bea," he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this (pointing to the bowl)?"<p>"Oh, yes," she replied, "isn't it wonderful? I was walking downtown last fall and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to put it on the organ, keep it wet, and it would prevent disease. And you know, I haven't had a cold all winter."