To K, MLC, Hosea, and the many others who have helped me over the past year - Many, Many Thanks. While my efforts at rebuilding my marriage have been unsuccessful, you've taught me a lot about myself and why my mariage failed. <P>When I couldn't sleep last Sunday night after some hurtful things that were said to me, I wrote down a few thoughts to help me let go of the past, and to remind me not to lose sight of my goals - even if my wife doesn't want to be the one to share them with me. Since I've benefitted so much from the inspirational things posted here, I thought I would offer this one in return.<P>Stardust<P>-----------------------------------------------------<P>Trust in Tomorrow<P>Recognize the Past:<BR>I have failed to make those I love a priority in my life.<BR>I have failed to provide the affection and companionship to those I love.<BR>I have failed to truly communicate with the most important person in my life.<BR>I have failed to provide a better home environment than I had as a child.<BR>I will not repeat these mistakes in the future.<P>Accept it. Your life has been forever changed. The scars from your failed marriage will be with you forever.<BR>You cannot change the past, neither can you continue to live in it. You did the best you could in the only way you knew how. You were true to your wedding vows and provided generously for your wife and child. You stayed the course, when the goals and dreams you desired most went unfulfilled. You didn't choose to end it like this, but it should come as no surprise to you in the long sequence of shattered hopes and desires. <P>Let go. Let go of someone who doesn't want you. Let go of someone who harbors anger and resentment for the events of the past and won't learn to forgive. Most importantly, let go of someone who doesn't honor the sacred vow they made to you and God. Learn from the past, then leave it behind to build a new future.<P>Move Forward. You're only 45. You still have half your life ahead of you and you're a wiser person now than you once were. There is still time to attain that special relationship which will bring fulfillment to all those hopes and dreams you've carried inside you for so long. There are many women in this world who would cherish the devotion and dedication you possess. <P>Build for the Future:<BR>I dream of a woman who cares about her health and appearance, and who desires me over everyone else in the world as her husband, lover, provider, confident and father of her children.<BR>I dream of a woman who recognizes the good qualities I possess, and appreciates what I do and provide for her, our family, and our community.<BR>I dream of a woman who desires physical intimacy and recognizes it as an expression of my love for her.<BR>I dream of a woman who cherishes her role as mother to our children and raises them in a Christian home.<BR>I dream of a woman of character, who makes the right choice instead of the easy one, who lives up to her obligations and keeps us within the boundaries of our commitment to one another.<BR>I dream of a woman who is committed to her marriage, lives by the Policy of Joint Agreement, and is completely honest and open in all parts of their relationship.<BR>Follow your dreams. She's out there somewhere, waiting for you.<P>Live for Today:<BR>I will not let her hurt me again today. I will turn the other cheek and think of the brighter days ahead. I will put my faith in God knowing that he will not give me more than I can handle, he will always be there beside me, and through my faith he will guide to a better life tomorrow.<P><BR>------------------<BR><B>Prayer doesn't change things for you - it changes you for things.</B><P><p>[This message has been edited by Stardust (edited February 08, 2000).]
