ok some of us ladies have been talking and want to do something to surprise and is nice for our H's ok here is the question.....<B>How do we seduce you and not look like a fool doing it</B>? in other words what would you like your W to do to or for you?<P>We would like some good answers please and if you men want to ask we will do the same for you.<P>Lesa<BR><P>------------------<BR>"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and<BR> lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> lms20ish@jobe.net

Lesa<P>After reading your post I had to laugh. It is so hard for men and women to understand each other. This is purely my own opinion, but I really don't think that there is any way that my wife could try to seduce me and look like a fool!! Before I begin, I apologize for the X-rated nature of this post, however, I just can't help it, I am a man you know. <P>First, men are wired to be aroused primarily by sight, so that would mean you need to wear the sexiest clothing you can find. A lot of women might think that this is trashy, but remember that what may be trashy to you could very well be the most beautiful and flattering thing in the world to your husband. Some women also think that they are being compared to the 19 year old emaciated models in the magazines, but I assure you that a flesh-and-blood responding wife is far superior to a two dimensional representation of a woman in every way. Believe it or not, your husband does not want a fantasy woman, he wants you. He has trusted you to fulfill his sexual needs for the rest of his life, and believes that you are able to to do this. <P>Another misconception held by many women is that the focus of men's sexual activity is only orgasm. Although this may be certainly true of an 18 year old, it is not true of a mature married man. The most attractive woman is one who enthusiastically lets her husband know that she is totally enthralled with his lovemaking. Show your husband what you want and let him know how good it makes you feel. Tell him that he is satisfying you more than you ever dreamed possible. <P>Ask him his sexual fantasies and make them come true. As long as they involve only you and him and are not physically harmful, there are no limitations. Give him so many memories that all of his sexual thoughts are centered on you. <P>As for a plan, here it is. Get a babysitter for the kids. Rent a limo for the evening. Show up to pick him up at work in a demi-bra, thong, garterbelt, and fishnet hose covered up with a trenchcoat. As you drive away from his work, take off the trenchcoat and give him oral sex. Next, go to his favorite restaurant (yes, still in the same clothing, although I would suggest you put the trenchcoat back on), and have a wonderful meal. Then spend the night in a hotel, (preferably one with a private hot tub) and give him the night of his life, letting him know that your thoughts from now on will be of him and only him. <P>Other ideas would be nude scuba diving in private pool or interesting activities on a trampoline, please forgive me, with as little sex as I get, this is pretty much all that I think about. <P>May the Lord Bless you and Keep You<BR>John<BR>

I have done something kind of like that I'm posting this in two places so I just write on and paste it here, but I do thank you for the idea and it is the type of thing we were looking for......ok so far so good thanks guys...the females on here can tell what they have done in the past to do this as well.<BR>I'll start,the last time My H came to visit, I went to pick him up at the bus station,it<BR>was 8:00 at night I wore a pair of black stockings with the line up the back a garter<BR>belt and a trench coat,when he walked up to the car and went to put his bags in I<BR> opened the coat(just enough for him to see) and things wnet great for the next 20<BR>days while he was here.<BR> Lesa<P><BR><P>------------------<BR>"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and<BR> lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> lms20ish@jobe.net

Agree with John here, 100%!<P>You're worried about looking like a fool to H when you seduce him, Lesa?<P>Geez, if my W did anything REMOTELY like what John suggested, the only one who would look like a fool would be ME... drooling, panting, etc. <P>Not to mention having to walk in public slightly hunched over, if you understand my meaning!

ya see thats how I want my H when he gets here just like that!!!! just like last time<BR>

We have a little advantage in that our kids spend every other weekend with their other parents. One night my husband came home from work to find me with nothing on but my ss's mexican sombrero and an apron. Mexican food(which is his favorite) cooking on the stove and in the oven and a pitcher of Margarits's chilling in the fridge. It cost very little and took only a little imagination. Needless to say the night went great. We look back on that night, although there have been others since, and alway smile.

I agree strongly with the other replies!<P>Especially these -<P> - No woman ever looks like a fool seducing her husband. <BR> - The models in fashion magazines are not attractive to the average man. There IS such a thing as too skinny.<P>You may be concerned because you don't weigh what you did when you were first married? A little enthusiasm, a little imagination, and believe your husband when he says that he couldn't care less.<P>Your husbands are lucky men!<BR>

LMS,<P>I will agree with the other guys. I have said it before and I will say it again. ENTHUSIASM. If you have that for you H, you have no worries. As for looking foolish, there is absolutely you can or will look foolish to your H, if you goal is to please him.<P>Do you know why men buy or like to see their W's in sexy underware? If W puts something like that on, it says I'm in the mood. You really have no idea how often men don't even bother to ask their W's for sex because they really don't need another rejection today or any day for that matter. <P>We like our signals clear and unambiguous. <P>Go for LMS, you will have an H that is smiling all of the time.<P>JL

Well the ladies want some more suggestions, so here goes:<P>Ladies, believe it or not, what husbands really want is intimacy with their wives. We really don't care if you are fat, skinnny, old or young, we just want to know that you still think that we are the man for you. We want to be able to tell you our thoughts without being ridiculed, we want to tell you our fears without you being shocked, and we want you to love us and want to be near us. <P>When you approach us to make love, this is what you are telling us.<P>May the Lord Bless You and Keep You.<BR>John

John & JL,<P>As you can probably tell from the other post I am not a shy person when it comes to showing my H I want him,The ladies love what ideas we have gotten so far,but....I need something out of this world my H is only going to be in town 10 days (he lives 4000 miles away) we had great sex the last time and we got close I want that again, but I want to compleatly blow his mind. I just need help with the plain. <BR>Lesa<P>------------------<BR>"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and<BR> lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> lms20ish@jobe.net <P>[This message has been edited by LMS (edited February 13, 2000).]<p>[This message has been edited by LMS (edited February 13, 2000).]

Hey Lesa,<BR>Okay you asked for it!!<P>Pull out all the stops! Buy some "toys" if you think your H might like the idea of "playing" in bed. (Ya see, I'm taking it for granted that you don't have any LOL!!) Break out the whipped cream (spray can). Throw in a few marachino cherries (strategicly placed). Make it a human dessert!!! Have fun licking all the stff off of each other. <P>Oh and make sure you wear the "f*** me pumps", even if you wear nothing else at all! <P>If he'll let you, tie him up, stradle him and let him "look, but not touch". Tease, tease, tease!!!!<P>And you were wondering if I could come up with anything good!!!! LOL

LMS,<P>Now Mitzi sounds like she knows what she is talking about . But given your situation, I don't think just sex is all there is to this. But isit2late has the right idea. In someways you want to blow his mind, but you also want to reach him at the deepest levels. This takes some thought on your part.<P>Who or what are you competing against? Another woman, his fear that you will have another affair, fear of commitment on his part? You see the mindblowing sex will definitely get to a man, but it can leave the wrong message also. <P>For example, yeah she is hot for me now but what happens later? It wasn't like this before what has changed? Do you see what I am saying? I am not arguing for not blowing his mind, but you really want to do is capture his mind. You want to capture his mind with YOU not just your body. <P>LMS, bodies come and bodies go, but people bring so much more. I think the mindblowing sex will help but you need to reach him at a deeper level. If I'm not mistaken hasn't your FIL been someone you can talk with. Perhaps he knows your H well enough to shed some light on this as well.<P>I am just guessing here, but I would guess that you need to come across as a woman that can take care of herself, but really loves her H. A woman that can handle what may come but would rather handle it with H. A woman who wants her husband intimately, but only him. I don't mean to be standoffish, but someone willing to deal with realities of life.<P>I know I am throwing a wet blank on the particular thread, the sex stuff is much more fun, but you know just the right touch or look in your eyes may stir more than you think. <P>You need to put him at ease, although he is coming down to file for divorce. I suspect he will feel guilty. Can you be his friend again? Can you sit and discuss things with him with a distance and perspective that a good/best friend could? If you can and then have great sex, then I suspect you will accomplish your goal or have the best chance.<P>LMS, I really like your attitude. Can't understand why your H would not as well, but something else is going on and you have to touch those places in him that overcome that something else. It will be difficult, I know, but think of this visit as a total package. Sex is a good thing, but I suspect you will need more.<P>God Bless You and Your Family,<P>JL

Mitzi, you know we have already talked about every thing you said AND more the other day since <B>YOU</B> are one of the ladies who helped me ask the question....though ya would get me didn't ya.<P>JL,<BR> you hit it when you said I need to reach him on a deeper level, He is afraid I will have another A but that didn't bother him for the last five years,(that is what has my mind so mixed up one day he wakes up had just cant live with it any more) The sex before was great we made love every night until he told me he wanted a divorce. but the whole going into public in not much more than a trench coat was something new I must say.<BR>what I was wanting to do is to find a way for me to make my H want to make love to me again, we always have out deepest talks after, when I am laying with my head on his shoulder, I am trying to find a way to get him to open up to me(he is a very my feelings are no ones business kind of person)and so far in the 9 years we have been together this has been the only time he has opened up to me.<BR>we both have always said friendship was never hard for us, well right now it is hard for me but I am doing it, when he calls he talks to the kids and then to me we talk mostly about his work but I know it really stresses him out, I have always loved to pamper my H to help get rid of the stress I do things like have him lay across my lap with out his shirt and scratch lightly up and down his back and arms that is also how I helped him go to sleep when he had trouble, if he called me from work having a bad day...I would have a hot bath dinner and a cold beer in the bathroom waiting he would eat in the tub and have his beer while I was giving him a bath. so yes I have to reach him on a deeper level but I'm still trying to figure out why the sudden change in my Ha week before he told me we were making plains for a trip for our anniversary and right now we are supposed to be on our first trip without the kids he was going to take me to Hawaii, he did a 180 in the span of a week, no one saw it coming. I'm just trying every thing I know to get him to open up and talk to me, while he was here last Nov we had such a great time he told me he was happy and comfortable and being with me and the kids felt right, as soon as his plane landed in anchorage he was this cold hateful SOB I don't know, he even went so far as to say us sleeping together every night was just for fun. so I don't know what I am dealing with and FIL has no idea to get to him and get him to open up to anyone, so please don't misunderstand me its not just about sex, even though it is very good I want every thing that comes along with it, I just have to make him want it. ya know what I mean?<BR>Lesa<BR><P>------------------<BR>"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and<BR> lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> lms20ish@jobe.net

LMS,<P>I am going out on a limb here; really not much of a limb. I suspect your H is having an affair. He is justifying it through your affair. When you read here especially in the infidelity section, you see the constant switching of affection from the spouse to the OW and back. This sounds very much like that. He feels guilty because he knows it is wrong, but wants to do it. <P>How does he make himself feel better? By saying "you had an affair and I want a divorce". I really don't know how to help you more than to say to use Plan A, which is hard from a distance. Maybe when he comes down in March and sees you, the reality light will switch on. With you not really present, it sounds easy to ask for a divorce. It is much different face to face and with parents and children around.<P>There is hope, and your attitude is wonderful. Keep it up.<P>God Bless You and Your Family,<P>JL