Hurt, I wouldn't do the paragraph to her. Do Plan A, give her some space. Make arrangements, that the money situation is your control. My WH spent $7000.00 on the OW, and we are not rich. OW didn't have to pay for anything, she gave the woe is me to my WH that she didn't have a job and they didn't have enough money. Keep track of all money spent, give her an allowance per week/if need be. Jennifer told me in the very beginning, but it is hard with having your own business. WH just had the customers make checks out to him, and he cashed them.<p>Do Plan A, tell her that you love her, tell her how sweet she is, and set up counseling. If she doesn't go to counseling, then you know she is in the BIGGEST FOGGGG!!!! <p>Hurt, this is going to be very difficult. My WH showed a very ugly side of himself. Our older Kids and myself were careful of what we did or said. Hopefully, the sex will come around, and just as a precaution, STD is rampid. Remember who she sleeps with, you will sleep with, and who the OM, is you are going to sleep with all he slept with. The commercial on TV that showed the one girl in a theatre and how STD is transferred by one sexual encounter to others, is really a great commercial. <p>I am fearful of my state of health. My WH slept with the OW, and she has had for sure one other sexual affair in her marriage. Possibly more, with an investigator I had hired. I have asked WH to have the AIDS and STD tests done. Found a place recently that will do it. This is a FEAR in me, and a FEAR of all of us whose spouses decided to have an outside sexual partner! This is nothing to be laughing about. I asked my WH what is he going to say to our kids, my mother, his mother, family, if I have AIDS? This is freaking me out.<p>Anyways, don't encourage her to leave, be kind and gentle. Plan A beautifully, and you will probably get the turnaround you would like. ALSO, do counseling, she is in a deep FOGGG!!!!!
