Has anyone heard of or used with any success this book "Stop Your Divorce" by Homer McDonald?<p>I have ordered most of Harley's books, but they seem to be for when the WS want's to work on the relation ship. My wife has already tlked to a lawyer and just can't seem to get enough of this other b#$%@!*. I am so commited to fixing this marriage, but hse won't give me a chance. I wonder if she'll ever know or care how deeply she has hurt me...

RobC,
From what I understand it follows alot of the same principles of MB...just costs more...It's about validation, no begging, whining, being good to yourself kind of stuff...very similar to the principles of MB...

I am reading Relationship Rescue. It is helping me to identify my issues and how to correct them. All you can do is make yourself better. Whether she will stay or not is up to her.

Honestly I can't remember that much about that book but I do have a copy of it. I do remember liking some portions of it and totally disagreeing with some portions.

I got this off http://www.divorcebusting.com. I hope this helps. DivorceBusting suggests doing a 180.
1. Do not pursue, reason, chase, beg, plead or implore!
2. No frequent phone calls
3. Do not point out good points in marriage
4. Do not follow him around the house
5. Do not encourage talk about the future
6. Do not ask for help from family members
7. Do not ask for reassurances
8. Do not buy gifts
9. Do not schedule dates together
10. Do not spy on spouse
11. Do not say "I Love You"
12. Act as if you are moving on with your life
13. Be cheerful, strong, outgoing and attractive
14. Don't sit around waiting on your spouse - get busy, do things, go to church, go out with friends, etc.
15. When home with your spouse, (if you usually start the conversation) be scarce or short on words
16. If you are in the habit of asking your spouse his whereabouts, ASK NOTHING
17. You need to make your partner think that you have had an awakening and, as far as you are concerned, you are going to move on with your life, with or without your spouse
18. Do not be nasty, angry or even cold - just pull back and wait to see if spouse notices and, more important, realize what he will be missing
19. No matter what you are feeling TODAY, only show your spouse happiness and contentment. Show him someone he would want to be around.
20. All questions about marriage should be put on hold, until your spouse wants to talk about it (which may be a while)
21. Never lose your cool
22. Don't be overly enthusiiastic
23. Do not argue about how he feels (it only makes their feelings stronger)
24. Be patient
25. Listen carefully to what your spouse is really saying to you
26. Learn to back off, shut up and walk away when you want to speak out
27. Take care of yourself (exercise, sleep, laugh & focus on all the other parts of your life that are not in turmoil)
28. Be strong and confident and learn to speak softly
29. Know that if you can do 180, your smallest CONSISTENT actions will be noticed much more than any words you can say or write
30. Do not be openly desperate or needy even when you are hurting more than ever and are desperate and needy
31. Do not focus on yourself when communicating with your spouse
32. Do not believe any of what you hear and less than 50% of what you see. Your spouse will speak in absolute negatives because he is hurting and scared
33. Do not give up no matter how dark it is or how bad you feel
34. Do not backslide from your hardearned changes.

Work on yourself and look at your part in all of this, she may or may not ever give you a chance either way you will be a better person.