My husband had ignored me for almost ten months now... <p>We met outside our apartment the other night, and we didn't even say or give any facial expression to each other. He went to a nude strip club.<p>I have given another try to talk to him. <p>I asked him what made him treat me like this. He said "What did I do?" I said treating me like I am no one, I am your wife!! and I asked if I had done anything wrong. He said it's always him.. him him that have made mistake. Because I truely can not recall what I did wrong, but he can not tell me what I have done wrong! <p>Again he walked away and warned me if I don't leave him alone, he will get angry. His face turned to this evil maniac face! <p>All I know is he has a long distance relationship this this girl in Naperville, IL which I had never confronted him about. My sister told me that man can become violance if they know that you know that they have an affair and that I have snooped around. Well, he leave me no choice, but to do that since he leave me in the dark, not knowing anything, just silence and angry and evil face!<p>My H and the girlfriend have been calling each other almost everyday. Now he only calls her from his cell phone after I mentioned to him that a girl keep calling and would not say a word.<p>I am to the point where enough is enough plus my back are sore from sleeping on the small sofa and the floor.<p>Do I even need to tell him that I am moving out since I don't think he cares if I am dead or alive!

It would be a good idea for you to go to a counselor. It sounds like you may have trouble setting boundaries. Allowing him to ignore you for 10 months. It sounds like you have a problem with him going to the strip bar - have you told him this? You have not confronted him about the girl from Naperville. You say your sister says not to confront him because he may get violent.
Has he ever been violent before? Are you willing to live with an unfaithful H out of fear? Why are you sleeping on the small sofa and the floor?<p>He has lots of issues too but you can't fix him. You can fix you though. <p>As far as moving out. There are sooo many issues for you to work on. Usually when you get a healthier emotional balance your Spouse will either join you to desire to also have a healthier emotional mindset or he will choose to stay emotionally unstable and will leave. But you get better either way. The big problem with leaving is you have not grown through this so most likely you will leave and find another relationship just like the one your in. If you work on you - and you will become healthier emotionally then you will attract other emotionally healthy people (which is why he won't stay). You come out better in the long run. <p>There is a good book called "Boundaries" By Claude and Townsend that can also help you get started. <p>I'm sorry your here. Your pain is an experience to grow. I know it is very painful.

I LuvNprotect ME,<p>Thanks for your advice.<p>I have gone to see a doctor several time. The doctor told me that the problem is not me. It's him who have the problems.<p>I have tried and tried to work on our marriage, but he never is willing to talk. Our culture is marriage is for live, divorce is a shame thing.
at least for me, I am a conservative woman.<p>I don't think he has the same intension of going forward with our marriage. He is busy with his affair and living like a single man and forgot about me. <p>The reason why I stick around is I was hoping he will change one day. I wept when I think of leaving him and living alone. I know it's stupid of me! I am very tired of being a nice and patient wife.<p>I have never screamed back to him. Everytime he treaten that he will get mad, I do not understand that. I am the one who have the right to get mad, who was not treated as a human being!<p>I have never talked to him about his going to a strip club or calling the girlfriend. Because there was not a chance to do so and I am afraid he will get nasty. When he is mad, his face turns very evil... I don't know what he is capable of doing.<p>We live in the same apartment but he only write notes to me when he needs me to pay for my bills. By the way, the reason why I sleep on the floor/sofa is beacuse he took over the bedroom and lock himself in there. <p>I am definately moving out at the end of our lease (end of May). The tought thing is I don't want my Mom and family to know that my marriage didn't work out.