Its been 6 months since DD and I have been on good plan A for 4 months. My WS hasnt changed how she feels ONE bit and still wants a divorce. After 2 tries at marriage counseling that didnt help at all, I thought I was ready to give up and get a divorce. I saw a second lawyer last week but couldnt sign the papers even though I tried to pysch myself up. I am tired of no affection or companionship. Last week I overheard my wife talking to 2 different friends about the OM like a teenager and it disgusted me. I was told to focus on myself and not her. She keeps saying she wants a divorce but hasnt gotten a real job (she just got an under the table job) and hasnt made plans or prepared in any way. I finally am ready to talk about a D and the kids etc but she says she hasnt talked to her counselor or lawyer yet and doesnt know what her options are. My lawyer and counselor told me D is inevitable and dont wait much longer. My counselor thinks its time for me to move on and not worry about her or her future.<p>I have posted quite a bit in the just found out forum My story

Rick, before giving up have you considered Plan B.
It may help your WS snap out of the fog and it will definately help you out. Plan A is very tough, I know that I could not do it for too long.
It was easier for me not to LB in Plan B than in Plan A. It sounds like the more you pressure her the futher you are driving her away from you. I know it is very difficult, I have been there, the hurt is so great, you want to talk logically to the WS but logic doesn't work when they are in the fog, it does no use to try to reason things out, you just have to let it go.
Take care,
Dave

Rick,
I would also like to say that your w is a grown girl and has made her decisions-evidenced by her actions. When you finally decide that it is over, I think you should move on, don't worry about her. She is using you for a crutch while carrying on like an immature child. If she doesn't plan for her future, don't worry. You will actually be committing an act of kindness by helping her take responsbility for herself.<p>I asked my x to move out 4 years ago...if I hadn't moved, he'd still be living with me and my daughter. It was too easy to get my support-financially, socially, domestically-and he lived the way he wanted to. I guess only an idiot would leave that.