I'm new to this forum, but I think you guys/gals might be able to help. 2 weeks ago my wife said that the spark is gone, and she is having doubts as to whether it was ever there at all. She looks at me more like a brother than a husband. We've been married about a year and a half now, no kids, no house (renting), so the financial part is not that bad. I want to fight for her, but she told me today to just accept the truth and give up trying to fight to keep her. We started marriage counselling last week, but my wife said that it just made her decision to leave more like the right thing to do. She wants to be free and not married to me. I want to fight to save the marriage b/c I love her to much to just give up. We can discuss more in follow ups to this post, but I need some advice on what to do. Therapist says stay firm and don't give up yet (but don't pressure the wife either), but I'm not going to fight hard in a hopeless situation. I'm pretty bummed out, so any positive things that you can think of that I can focus on will help.<p>Thanks,<p>nasakid

Weekends are slow here. Take the time to read the info such as meeting emotional needs and Plan A.<p>You may also want to post in the Emotional Needs forum. Most people here are already divorced and are in the throes of divorce.<p>Hang in!

Welcome nasakid...<p>There is a post of general welcome I wish to share with you... [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] <p>It has a lot of quick links to many of the most important MB sites...
Click here ==> General Welcome for All New Builders(Newbies)<p>About your post...<p>Don't rule out an infidelity...
Check out...50 signs your spouse is having an affair (All found on this board)...Triumph2....2/23/2000<p>Do start on a Plan A...
Check out the post Plan A - 101 (2nd ed.).<p>Plan A is designed to improve you first and foremost...
...and that needs to the beginning steps of any possible recovery.<p> [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Jim / NSR

The info on this site is a good start, but "Love
Busters" and "His Needs Her Needs" will explain what has happened and what can be done to fix it. Even if this one can not be resusitated (I hope it can) these will prevent a repeat. May God be with you both.

also suggest checking out the ENs section of this
forum and Plan A/Plan B section.<p>I heard the exact same thing from my stbxw in the beginning, turns out she was having an affair.. be on the lookout for this BUT very importantly if you find out she is, don't lose you temper, especially in front of her, this is VERY important as it just serves to drive her closer to the OM. I wish I had this information before I find out my stbxw was having a A. I was so mad a punched my computer screen and broke my hand, computer was fine. You need to learn everything you can asap. Also suggest reading Surviving an Affair, you can find it at the online book store here. You will need to learn to back off and give her space, this is very important but also very difficult to do for some people. After reading all of this information you will need to put a plan in place, probably what is referred to as Plan A here. Good luck, keep posting and reading so that you understand what is happening to both of you.
Dave