My H and I just had a bad conflict again. I might call it the worst one.<p>Saturday, 9:30 am I rented a lawn mower and mowed the front and the backyard. All he did was pick up sticks. So after that we cleaned up and he told me that we need to go to work and get some things done. (Attendance, write-ups etc.)We agreed to go to Subway to get a sandwich. When we arrived at Subway. I asked him if I can drive. This time. He copped a little attitude. So I mumbled, "I am going to stop being nice and begin to act arrogant one of these days." He went over to the table and the lady was trying to ask what kind of sandwich I want I was trying to get his attention to come up there with me. So he copped another attitude. I he gave me 5 dollars and bought me a $3.19 sub. And I gave him the remaining of the change. He snatched from me in public. I was so mad so he stomped outside and I did too. He started getting upset and said, "Maybe I need to go home and forget about Central (school). It seems like every danmgone weekend I can't never get anything done." I said, "I'm not stopping you from going to work. Let's just go to work." He cussed at me and said "Alright, damnit." We'll go to work, ****." So I asked "Why are you cussing at me." He got mad and swung the car around and said "Alright, damnit, we'll go back home." I started crying. I told him that I do not think that our marriage is going to work. SO we went home and argued for a little bit more and he said "If you do not want to leave then I will buy you an apartment and I will move to Califonia by myself, but I don't want you to stay back here in Kansas City." I was about to overdose on some pills and he told me not to do anything that stupid. I went to visit my little brother for a few hours. I asked my H what time he think that things are going to quiet down before I return home. He said "6:00." So I decided to stay later and came home @7:32. My H told me that he start to get worried when I come home late. So I was quiet and he was apologizing to me and I did not eat anything at all. I was so mad. I kept on going in the other room and he came in there asking could he keep me company. So I did not care. He told me that it is not my fault and I did the right thing, he just did not do his part like he was supposed to right think I am afraid of saying anything to him. PLEASE HELP ME BEFORE I OVERDOSE!!!!???

Angela, I know that any time someone threatens to kill her/himself that it is a tremendous cry for help. Are you seeing a counselor - it would be wonderful if both you and your husband had some counseling as a couple, or so it seems to me. <p>However, you can't fix the marriage without doing some repairs on the people.<p>Do you work? You say your husband works at a school. Do either of you have an Employee Assistance Plan through your employer? They will usually provide up to 6 FREE counseling sessions before referring you on to another provider.<p>Please do yourself, your parents, and your brother a favor. Call the EAP or a community mental health program TODAY. (Don't do it for husband. Do it for yourself and the people who have loved you longest.) But mostly for YOU!

You must call 911 or suicide prevention if you feel you are in danger.<p>Don't do anything to hurt yourself...it's actually not yourself you are hurting, but those who love you.<p>I see Cinderella just posted too. Read her comments.<p>Take care of YOURSELF..it is hard, but we are all struggling here....

what I honestly want to know is what am I doing wrong???? Please tell me that.

Hello 1exception,<p>Although I am not the moderator for this area of the forum, I saw your cry for help, and would like to encourage you to call 1-800-SUICIDE.<p>While the Marriage Builder's website cannot legally become involved in threats of this kind, please know that your pain is taken seriously. <p>Also, please take to heart the replies of both Cinderella and LearningLife. <p>Life is precious.

{{{1exception}}},<p>Suicide Crisis Center... 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433)
Suicide and Suicide Prevention
1-800-NEW-LIFE.<p>Please reach out for help.<p>You are loved.

Angela, honey,<p>There are going to be brighter days. Don't do anything to hurt yourself. If you must, call the local mental hospital and have yourself committed. You must do whatever necessary to save your life. Please.<p>If you are able to hold on, please call a health professional (psychiatrist) and tell them you need an emergency appointment. I think you are in desperate need of anti-depressants. I was in your state of mind a few years back. Anti-depressants saved my life and kept me from ruining the lives of my family and friends. Please get help immediately. <p>Call 911 if necessary. Please.

1E, you mention "Maybe I need to go home and forget about Central (school). It seems like every danmgone weekend I can't never get anything done." I said, "I'm not stopping you from going to work....<p>Are you in Highschool "Meaning Central High School"?

Noone here can answer what you are doing wrong? Like all of us, you have alot of work to do in understanding yourself and your situation.
Number one is "Take Care of Yourself". You can't fix your problems if you aren't healthy - mentally or physically.
Seek professional help now. Or talk to your priest/minister. You're reaching out on this board, now you need to reach out locally. Try a suicide prevention hotline, I'm sure they'll have references for good programs in your area.
I wish you well. Making a call will be a first step toward taking care of yourself.

Once you get your emotions under control and get out of the swamp of depression, i suggest you and your husband seek counseling. Perhaps you will want to go to individual counseling...if you want to kill yourself, there are underlying issues that make you feel that things will never get better and you must deal with them. <p>You and H will want marriage counseling to work on issues like how to have constructive discussions instead of destructive arguments, how to communicate better, how to meet each other's needs better.<p>Your h sounds like mine does sometimes-an immature brat who thinks he can talk to anyone anyway he wants and when he decides he's through, then you should just get over it. You aren't doing anything wrong to expect to be treated with respect and courtesy, especially in public. I think maybe the marriage counseling can help here.<p>Hugs, kid.

Yes. He works at Central high school. it seems like he is taking his work problems out on me.

1E, You mentioned "I was about to overdose on some pills and he told me not to do anything that stupid. I went to visit my little brother for a few hours" <p>Where do you work and what pills were you going to take?