I AM TRYING VERY HARD TO IMPLEMENT (B) WITHOUT CONTACT WITH X WIFE. WELL 2.5 DAYS WENT BY BEFORE SHE DROVE TO MY HOME TO DROP OFF IMP. PAPERS & JEANS FOR MY DAUGHTER & I RAN INTO HER IN DRIVEWAY. THEN SHE SAID SHE FEELS BAD FOR ME SINCE SHE GOT ENGAGED ON MOTHERS DAY TO BOYF. SHE HUGGED ME FOR THE FIRST TIME IN ONE YEAR AND WE BOTH HAD TEARS. SAID TO ME I AM SURPRISED YOU AREN'T GOING TO VISIT BOYF. AND CAUSING A PROBLEM ETC... I SAID I AM NOT GOING TO CAUSE ANY PROBLEMS BUT I MISS YOU VERY MUCH. SHE SAID BOYF. WILL BE GOOD FOR HER AND CHILDREN. I SPOKE TO COUNSELOR AND HE SAID SHE WILL MORE THAN LIKELY BECOME ADDICTED TO HIM IF NOT ALREADY SINCE HE IS A PHARMACIST AND PROBABLY HAS A GOOD INCOME, BIG HOME, TO TAKE CARE OF HER SINCE SHE CURRENTLY IS ON LIMITED INCOME WITHOUT WORK. WELL WHAT I DO AT THIS POINT ? I TOLD HER THAT MY COUNSELOR SAID I NEED TO LET HER GO COMPLETLY. SHE SAID YOU MEAN CUT ME OFF ALL TOGETHER WITHOUT TALKING ETC.????? I SAID YES. SHE DIDN'T LIKE THIS. PLEASE RESPOND TO THIS FOR
NORMJ

Norm,
You didn't fail, you slipped up, everyone does at these things, hell I had trouble with Plan A.<p>Just go back to Plan B. She still thinks you two can "be friends." Maybe when she realizes that you don't need a "friend" like that she will start to come to her senses.<p>Hang in!!!!<p>Bob

Hey normj, you didn't fail you were a success!! WOw what more could you ask for? Guilt on mothers day every year for Adultery? thats her own action not your fault, its going to rock there relationship all the time...This relationship won't last, it'l be one those stat deals in the future....I told my W in Dec 6 months ago I did'nt want to be her friend anymore and said because you're below what I would have for a woman friend and besides you changed your not the same person I once knew and don't have those same eliquent qualities I remember and I'm not attracted to you....now that hit hard...I shut the door and guess who opened it back up, she did...<p>I love her dearly, but she saw me moving on and getting strong. I told her the next woman is going to be 2 times what I had with her and that gets to her bad, **but I say to her I want that next woman to be a restored you**, I want you back better than what you were before I want you to reach your potenial in life. Now this bothers her because she fears if another woman comes along[which I'm not looking, but could]she feels I'm looking for someone twice what she is, beauty,charm etc....Over the years I 've told my wife I'm her greatest fan, I'll even ask for her autograph if I was crazy enough...<p>I remember my W high on the hog in A's the day I left Fl, I stopped by her house and told them I was leaving in a few days and she looked at me stunned like I can't believe you're leaving me.... a few days went by no contact still, the day I left I was on my way to tell kids goodby and she threaten to call the police if I went to see kids, so I with no goodbye,so I will see them next week for first time since July 2001 it was hard never getting a formal goodbye....<p>Anyway after I got to missouri, she cried and screamed, WHY? WHY? WHY? why did you leave me?? I was shocked, she even said was thinking about putting it all back together??AT this time this was affair number 5!...I was caught off guard on that one because she totally ignored me while I lived in same city, I was left in total silence, this was 3 months after our counseling to, she had even bought OM clothes after our last counseling session..I was just torn up in peices back then...<p>Anyway don't give up, there's more happening in her than you know, just work on you, you must become fun and innovative with yourself, when they see you sad and broken down it reminds them of why they left and OM man looks fun, they feel something still when you hug them keep that open, I remember hugging my wife in a simple way onetime and she got turned on, I was shocked, she felt something and shocked her too, at that time I thought I was the ugliest and most hated man around....When I get back from FL next week I should have a interesting story of how a WS responds 1,200 miles away after not seeing each other for 9 months,,stay posted..

I totally agree with what everyone said, just restart your Plan B, no damage done. I am starting to get some results (I hope) with Plan B. WS told me that when I cut off contact with her, it was
extremely difficult for her and made her re-examine the situation/A. It does work, just try to stick with it.
Take care,
Dave