Hi all....<p>Background:<p>1. Invitied to a wedding this afternoon<p>2. Bride is a secretary for the attorney that represented my ex through the divorce process<p>3. My fiance is the grooms boss, all from work are invited<p>4. My son is a groomsman<p>5. My ex is invited<p>6. Ex's attorney and law firm staff will be there<p>Small town living at it's finest! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Here goes *taking the high road* advise we always give each other here! [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Gayle<p>P.S. Movie script in the works! If I need bail money can I call y'all?

Gayle,<p>You will be in my prayers today. When I get into similar situations, I keep saying to myself, "I am calm and confident, I am calm and confident..."<p>God Bless, <p>D.

One of my mantras has been:<p>I can do this.
I can do this.
I can do this.

Ragamuffin,<p>How was it?<p>I'm probably too late for advice, I was gonna tell you to hold your head high and go in with grace...oh well, you probably did that anyway. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>ANNA

Thank you D., Cinderella & Anna for your prayers, mantras and thoughts!<p>I am alive and well. "Whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger", or in the least presents you with situations thought not possible to have stamina to get through.<p>We decided to forgo the wedding and attend the reception. I just couldn't walk into the same church I was married in with the ex and his attorney sitting in the pews. My stomach was churning as we parked the vehicle. It was about 7:30 p.m. when we arrived. Walked through the doors, shook hands with the groom, turned and saw a couple of guys that had that *deer in the headlights* look. (my ex and his attorney, sitting at two different tables) I'm sure they had no idea that we were invited or why!<p>Walked to the bar to get something to drink and sat down at a table that was located between the "two" of them, as they were at different tables. The law firm crew at one table, my ex sitting at the other table with all of my sons friends and their wives.<p>His attorney left, I bet, only 5 to 10 minutes after my arrival and the ex left within a half an hour. Geez guys the party was just starting and it was still daylight out!<p>The kicker is my ex had talked to my daughter-in-law. He had just found out that week (from her mother who cuts his hair) that I was engaged. It happened 6 months ago. He told my DIL over and over how he wanted to talk to me. (he hasn't spoken to me personally in over 4 years, only through his attorney) She told him, "she's sitting right there and you know where she lives, you know where she works, call her". <p>He continued to tell her that the fall of the marriage was because of so many "other peoples" influences. La-de-da......couldn't have been he had cheated from 30 days after our vows until the end. This is the guy who didn't even quiver at the sight of one of his OW sitting in my support in the courtroom during trial.<p>DIL told me he had big crocodile tears running down his face and was sobbing when he left the wedding reception. I dreamt about a day like this for years....seeing him in pain....I don't. You know why? Because he still isn't honest with himself or others nor does he take any accountablity for his actions. Honesty, to me, is the most important and that will *never* come from him.<p>I have closure I never thought I'd have nor sought out. I can't explain it. Facing your demons is redeeming. The sun shines brighter today than it has for a long, long time!<p>Thank goodness for MB's, I've learned so much. I now know the marriage couldn't have been saved. I believe in the concepts here and use them every day. The heartache and struggle I've endured has made me a better person.<p>Gayle<p>P.S. On a lighter note, my fiancee told me: "I can't believe you are 5'1", 105 lbs. and can move 500 lbs. out of a building without lifting a finger." We had a blast and danced until midnight!

Gayle,<p>too many lawyers in one room for me, just being able to do that makes you a better person than I!<p>Its amazing how some people try to create all kinds of illusions to prevent themselves from dealing with reality. . .<p>nice job, and good decisions. . . . I am sure more people know the truth than we sometimes believe. . .<p>wiftty

Tom,<p>Thank you for replying to my thread!<p>Your compliments mean very, very much to me!<p>Gayle

Thanks for the update and the laugh regarding moving 500lbs out of a building....too cute!<p>ANNA

I heard a great line on the radio one day. "Our demons may be nothing but angels in disquise, waiting for us to find the courage to look them in the eyes." Probably needs its own thread.<p>So glad you rose to the challenge, met it head on, and won. <p>Congratrulations. <p>Now, will you come do something about my x?

"Our demons may be nothing but angels in disquise, waiting for us to find the courage to look them in the eyes."<p>That WOULD make a great thread! Go for it!<p>Now, will you come do something about my x? <p>A real piece of work huh? I'd love nothing more than to oblige you! [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img]

You go girlfriend!<p>Sounds like you not only had a blast, but got a few things that you've deserved for quite a while now.<p>E

<small>[ August 09, 2004, 09:39 PM: Message edited by: laura_lee ]</small>

Just a note:<p>After the reception a week ago, I saw my ex had self-soothed himself yet again. I spotted him pulling *formerly our* cuddy cabin with a new, blood red, Lincoln Navigator. You see he always thought the toys that represented you *made you*. They don't......he still doesn't get it.......

I know the feeling - as soon as my X got all her money, she went out and bought a top of the line Eddie Bauer Expedition. . . 18 months after I suggested that we look at Suburbans, and she chastised me for wanting to keep up with the rich neighbors. . . turns out my version of the Suburban is $10 grand less than her Expedition. . .<p>these people are disordered. . . and i feel sad for them, as they are missing the richness of experiences in the world. . . <p>I buy used cars, drive them until they can fix them any more, and spend my money on life experiences. . . some travel to new and different places, some new adventures, etc. . . <p>gayle, just wish them well. . . . and enjoy your own life. . . <p>BTW, this summer I will be in Nebraska, if you are willing to meet me in Chadron, on August 4th at 2pm ! would love to meet you! maybe at the center of town? [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] <p>tom [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img]<p>[ June 25, 2002: Message edited by: WhenIfindthetime ]</p>

Holy Cow Batman.....Chadron????? <p>Ok, here's the deal, pull out your handy, dandy atlas of Nebraska. Locate Chadron. Next find Hwy 281 which runs north to south through the state. Are you with me so far? Get a ruler out, put it on the Nebraska/Kansas border (on 281), measure 1-3/4 inches north, that's where I am. Or you could say 13 inches due south-east from Chadron.<p>Boy I'd love nothing better than to shake your hand, in person, on main street at 2:00 p.m., but unless you get a little closer to civilization [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] I'm stuck!<p>I think there is an old fort up around Chadron that is toured today, with dress of the times etc. I can't remember the name of it. I bet that would really be neat for you and your kids to see!<p>By the way,<p>gayle, just wish them well. . . . and enjoy your own life. . . <p>thanks, I needed that!

gayle, unwilling to go the last 500 miles! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

we are just driving through from Denver to Mt Rushmore, and we figured that if we took a small
detour, we could grab another state and add it to our list. . . .

i was more teasing than anything else. . . knowing full well that if we stop at Chadron, we would be dodging arrows and if captured, our faces would be smeared with pale face paint!

Chadron, the last frontier!!!!!!

wiftty