I'm making it just fine. I was divorced on the 13th of May and have to pay all the bills and give my X 1000 a month for six months. After that, I pay her 1500 a month and she gets half of the bills. I have the children when I am home (It has been like that since all this came about anyway) I have quit plan B, I think she is suffering enough. She talks bad about him one day (and when I say bad, I mean stuff that would kill him if he knew that she would say those things about him) and then is in love with him the next. I don't think she has any idea! I kind of feel sorry for her. She has turned her life into a pitiful mess and don't even know it. She still hasn't looked for a job and she is not going to be able to live off of 1500 a month. The temp stuff will last for 6 months. I think she is expecting her on again off again partner to help out. There again, I feel sorry for her went reality slaps her in the face.
I do have to say that I had a weak moment or two and stayed with her for a few days. I loved being there with the children and they liked it too but I kind of felt dirty! Like I was the other man! It made me very uncomfortable and I told her that I had to leave. I knew she was calling him the whole time anyway. I must be insane for even stooping that low anyway! I don't feel that LOVE that I felt so long ago. It's like she is just another girl on the street now with a slight twist!
Very strange how time and hurt make you think differently. <p>No, I am not dating anyone but I am dating everyone, if that makes any sence. Strangest thing I ever seen, women coming out of the woodwork asking ME, the LOSER, for a date! I have been shocked.Ladies from the ages of 20 to 45! I'm 31!<p>I know that it is not a good idea to get into a steady relationship with anyone for a while and I am not, but what about sex? I'm pretty confused about that! It's not that I am starting it either. I have already been accused of being gay because I wouldn't sleep with a certain woman for crying out loud! LOL!!!!!<p>Anyway, Just wanted to give you all a update.<p>RN [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Roughneck,<p>I am 32 and am going thru the exact thing you are, the only difference is that we don't have any children... I am not divorce yet but plan to soon as I really need to get on with my life. I want to have a child someday.<p>If you knew my wife, her having an affair is the last thing in the world that anyone would dream that she would do but she did and I have tried to save our marriage... she says she wants her life back but says that she has done too much damage to ever repair what we had. She may be right. I guess I really do have to get on with my life as you have... <p>I really don't want a divorce to ruin us financially.. neither of us have any major bills so that should be a problem... I guess we are going to just split everything up and do it as cheap as we can... any advice.<p>Take care...<p>I still love her and would take her back tomorrow... either an idiot or very much in love.<p>Take Care<p>Mr. Hurt

So, Roughneck, whatcha doin' next weekend?<p>We have the canoe and the paddle boat out, but I could sure use a little help with the dock....<p>Wisconsin is a beautiful place...<p>Glad to hear you're doing well.<p>The rumor that you are gay has spread to IL, Mom heard it, but it hasn't gotten all the way up here yet.<p>Hey, have you been keeping up with the news - Hayman Fire in CO? It might hit my Dad's place, so toss a few good thoughs his way.<p>Elizabeth
6'
125 lbs
blonde
millionare
compulsive liar

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr> Strangest thing I ever seen, women coming out of the woodwork asking ME, the LOSER, for a date! I have been shocked.Ladies from the ages of 20 to 45! I'm 31!
<hr></blockquote> Absolutely freaking gorgeous and humble, too! Of course, women are crawling out of the walls to get to you...you are very attractive, you have a job, AND you like to do wild, fun things. You are a catch, even if you don't know it.<p>And 31 is a great age...same as my h...and I'm an old bag of 43. (fmd blanches, can't believe she actually admitted her age!).<p>I feel sorry for your x, too, because she is obviously confused. But don't, don't stay with her anymore---I know it's hard--but you are worth much more than being 'Mr. Back-up in case the A falls thru'. There is a woman out there who will adore you for the jewel that you are. It will take some time to find her (as well it should) but it will be worth it in the end.<p>Final Word: Loser, my a$$. [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img]

[img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Sounds like your life is moving forward. Way to go! All you can do for your ex is keep praying that she makes a good life for your children and gets herself together, finds a better job, learns to love herself and make right choices, etc... Good luck!

First of all, congratulations on doing so well. I hope I am doing that well after my divorce is finalised!!! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Roughneck:
<strong>
I know that it is not a good idea to get into a steady relationship with anyone for a while and I am not, but what about sex? I'm pretty confused about that!
</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Do NOT have sex with anyone until you are married. Trust me. Women want commitment. Not to mention the risk of STDs. More on the subject? Just ask [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p>And who cares if people think you are gay? They are just jealous. The woman you have waited for (2nd marriage?) will be worth it. <p>A.

Mr. Hurt,<p>I didn't say that I come through this without my share of bumps and bruises! I'm pretty sure that I will get a few more before it is all over with! (She knows what buttons to push but it's harder for her to get a reaction out of me.) I feel like I have been in a huge dryer, around and around I went taking on heck of a beating! (Put a pair of shoes in your dryer and pretend it's you.) LOL! Or maybe a frog in a blender! Hahaha! (Kind of a inside joke!)
I will tell you this, you WILL find peace, one way or the other. For everyone's sake I hope you can save your marriage. In my case, I couldn't. Sad but true. And another thing, just because that piece of paper is signed doesn't mean that your feelings turn off! Nope, they don't!
I have just learned how to cope with the situation and move on with my life. I still feel sad from time to time but I do feel my life turning out for the better.<p>Elizabeth,
I will be in the good ole gulf of mexico for the next month. I took several weeks off so I could try to pick up the pieces and now I feel like working for a change.
Yep, rumors travel fast but I didn't know they could get from Louisiana to there so fast!
Hope you are doing well!<p>
franklymydears,<p>[QUOTE]Absolutely freaking gorgeous and humble, too! Of course, women are crawling out of the walls to get to you...you are very attractive, you have a job, AND you like to do wild, fun things. You are a catch, even if you don't know it.[QUOTE]<p>You know what I look like? You know that I am a wild and crazy guy? How do you know this? I don't remember showing anyone a pic and I know that nobody knows that I am fun loving person!<p>Any no, I'm not going to stay with her anymore, to hurtful and she doesn't deserve me! I'm nobodies whipping boy!
I'm not going to get in a hurry but I know that there is someone out there for me. I'll just hang out until she comes along. <p>Something else, 43 isn't old! I dated a 45 year old that I couldn't keep up with and was a blast to be around! ( No, get your minds out of the gutter, I meant none of that sexually!)<p>BINthereDUNthat,
I am always hoping that she will get some help, straighten up and fly right! I do have to say that as far as mothers go, I couldn't have picked a better woman. She is great with the kids, but I think they will resent her a little after they get older and understand what happened but I truly hope that they don't.<p>She just needs to find a job period! I know 1500 is a lot of money a month but her house and her car is 1000 bucks by itself. That don't leave very much for things like utilities and food. She needs to get her head out of the clouds and see what is in store for her. <p>Avatar,<p>I know what you mean but lets get realistic. I really don't think that I can go years without sex! I do understand that sex feels better when you are in love with that person.
I am scared of STD's and have been scared of them all my life, I wore condoms before I got married, sometimes during and I don't plan on having sex without one. My X was pissed that I wouldn't have sex with her after the D without a condom. Hell, I don't know what that guys got! He lives three states over and no telling what he is doing over there.
I do want you to know this though, I'm not going to turn into what I was before I met my X! (A slut) <p>It has been almost 12 years since I was in the dating scene and I have to say that either I have changed or the dating scene itself has changed. <p>
Regards to you all!<p>RN [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Well, you silly little froggie, of course, I know what you look like...you posted the link once and I did look...you were standing with the x (stbx at that time) and you were at some bike club, remember?<p>Hence, I know you are gorgeous and a wild man.<p>Frog in the blender, huh? Only if there's tequila in there, too! [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p>And as for the 43 yrs old, I will have *YOU* know that there are times when my 31 yr old h begs for mercy (time to rest!) and I do mean SEXUALLY!<p>[ June 20, 2002: Message edited by: franklymydears ]</p>

Hmmmmmmm, yep, I think I do remember that now! I have slept several times since then and had too many late nights at the biker rallies! (By the way, I just got back from Austin, Tx. from a rally there. Party time! Slept 8 hrs in 4 days. Came back home and died for 18 hrs. Stayed up for about 4 hrs and went back to sleep for another 12! When I woke up I didn't know what day it was! LOL!)<p>I don't think frogs and (Ta kill ya) mix! I know it doesn't with this little froggie! Last time I drank any of that stuff I woke up and almost had to chew my arm off to keep from waking the THING that was lying next to me! Haven't touched the hard stuff since! <p>You are a very naughty young lady! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] You need a spanking in the worst way! I wouldn't advise that because you just might like it! At 31 he should have *YOU* begging for mercy! Tell him to quit being a tit and take his medicine like a big boy should! Hehehe! [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img]