XH is in town about an hours drive from me. He is visiting his mom. He let me know in the form he wanted to ask me a question about estates. Now my dad passed away in 1997 and my mom did all the paper work. So he is supposed to be helping his mom, and wanted to ask me a few questions. I couldn't really give him any advice. Later I thought maybe he could get me registration papers for the car I need to put into my name (part of settlement agreement). He a said he'd get them for me. When I called today to see if he did, he made an issue of it. That he is still sore about it! So I said I just asked him and if its too much trouble I can get the magistrate to sign
for me. He asked if that was a threat, no of course NOT! Merely a statement....
So anyway I said I did get him phone numbers etc when he wanted them and I'm just asking him this favour. He said OH so thats the only reason you have did it. Really this man is too much. I would not have asked him right now, only because I know
he is in town and it is easier here than where he lives. Whatever type of friendship he wants must be a one sided friendship. Whatever he needs and wants I must give to him and if I want anything he will bring up our relationship. I am really very angry. He has now said he will get me the papers. But now I am only being friendly for those
papers, no more friendship from me. Not if he is committing suicide, not if he is anything...... I am so scared I get sucked in again, because it feels like I am powerless when it comes to him. Everything is always about him, and all the things
he has said once again mean nothing. How sorry he was for how he treated me, and now that same treatment?! Who the hek does he think he is! I am just so angry again...

thanks for listening

Pantha

Oh geez, Pantha,

I guess being friends has gone right out the window, huh?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I am so scared I get sucked in again, because it feels like I am powerless when it comes to him.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">This I understand. After a year of separation and 8 months of divorce, I still have this problem to a degree. However, it's much less than it used to be. I just made a decision that she was no longer in charge of my life and that I didn't need her permission for anything, like being happy. It's not your fault that he's mad at you. He's just mad and he's taking it out on you.

Once you except the fact that he'll be mad at you no matter what, it's a lot easier to not worry about it.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Whatever type of friendship he wants must be a one sided friendship. Whatever he needs and wants I must give to him and if I want anything he will bring up our relationship. I am really very angry. He has now said he will get me the papers. But now I am only being friendly for those
papers, no more friendship from me.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Does that phrase "piss off" mean anything to him? This is just so unbelievable, although I think it's pretty normal too. I went through this stage with my W also. If I stood up to her on anything I was being an [censored]. Whatever. He just has to adjust his thinking about you, and that's going to be his problem, not yours.

Good luck, and here's hoping he's a quick learner.

Sounds needy.

No advice, but I hear ya.