Hi everyone,<P>Bear with me as this might be long, but I have to get it off my chest.<P>My son is now 5 weeks and I must return to work in a week (sadly). H and I worked out an arrangement where he would stay home during the day with him and work at night. 3 days into this arrangement, he gets offered 3 different (daytime) positions with his company. I really wanted him to behappy as these were promotions, so I was willing to find daycare to enable him to get one of the jobs, but his **tch of a boss wanted an answer THAT afternoon and I had to wait on the daycare to call me back the next morning. I thought I was just expresssing my frustration when I said I wished I wasn't in this position, but my H completely took it the wrong way. He proceeded to call his job and tell them to forget it! Then, he blamed me and said I MADE him give up those jobs.<P>So..now he wants a separation because he can't take anymore as he puts it and said that he feels as though if I don't like any decision HE makes or I don't agree then I will get mad and FORCE him to do what i want. That total blew me away because i always thought the decisions we made were together and I've done my best to support whatever he's wanted. It told him I did NOT hold that phone to his hand and force him to turn down those jobs, but he said i might as well have.<P>Anyway, guys I can't take anymore of this. Between his EA's and other treatment,I guess I just need to get out of this relationship,but I am so scared because Ihave this new baby to take care of.<P>Also, he says he's not leaving, that I have to leave or else we'll just live in the house together not speaking or talking. I can't handle that, and forget counseling, he's not interested.

wow- sounds like he just wants to blame you for everything. if there are other problems ( i dont know what ea's are) then maybe you should leave. there are millions of single mothers out there- i know you probably dont want to be one, but there are worse things- like being unhappy! he should have put your child before his promotion, at any rate. best of luck

Windy,<BR>Speaking from a mans point of view, I can say that a mans abillity to succeed and provide for his family in the best way possible is very strong. I know in my own case, I never feel like I make enough money to provide for my family, (especially in the millitary), thus I feel inadequate to my wife because of that. I know that money is not important for her because she has said on many occassions that it wasn't, but this is somthing that is part of the male to provide for his family and protect it. Right now, he possibly feels that this new job will be important for his family not only to succeed in your eyes, but to provide monetary safety to his new born. Does he play with the baby? Do you leave him alone to bond with the child? Are you always the one to calm the child when he/she acts up? These are also important things that he needs, so that he can be directed toward his family not his job. H needs to have some stock, if you will, in the family. I know in my own family when my first was born, my W was too domineering and didn't allow me alone time with my new babies, so by doing that, I was led adrift with my only option was to go where I thought I was needed to most, to make more money. I then got another job and spent less and less time away from home. Then, I took up golf, and spent that time away more. In the interim, I was shutting out my family. What I needed at that time was for my wife to let me be the father that "I" wanted to be not the one that she wanted me to be...<P>Hope this helps, and maybe you both can come to an agreement, not an argument....GOD bless...