This is merely an information gathering survey. All I really want is a "Yes" or "No" answer. You choose whether or not you wish to provide any details.<P>Here's the question: <P>*****Have you ever been had a wife/girlfriend who physically abused you?*****

NO.<BR>However, that is not the case for my brother.<BR>rrunrr<BR>

Yes, and I think you will find more men, if they are honest, will admit it.<P>It's very tough for our male ego to admit to it.<P>Besides, it's not politcally correct to even report it .... you don't find male abuse shelters .... and what's worse, the women's rights organizations practically call us liars and tell us "You probably deserved it."<P>This county needs to crack down on ALL Domestic Abus .... here in PA the latest PA Crimes Statistics show that 1 in 4 women are being abused ... THAT MAKES HEADLINES! The study ALSO shows that 1 in 4 men are being abused .... THAT IS NEVER MENTIONED!<P>I understand the importance of Plan A as a sort of last resort to save your marriage, but at least for me, Plan A has been most of my life. She didn't even want to EVER go to Plan B.<P>And yes it is VERY humilating, especially when you try EVERYTHING you know to please her and meet her needs, and no matter what you do, what you say .... is never enough.<P>She's found a used car dealer in NY state that is able to meet her needs. I'm thankful that two of my children are living with me. I never realized how much they saw and how much they hurt, when their Dad is being hurt. I've grown to love and appreciate my children more these past two years. <P>And call me stupid, but I will always love my wife, even after we're divorced.<P>I don't know how not to love her, and no matter what she says and does, I don't know how to ever hate her.<P><P>------------------<BR>

Dear Cinderella<BR>Sorry that you are not getting many reports. I am not afraid to say yes, she has hit me. I hesitate to call it abuse (but then, I think that a lot of depression is over-labeled, as well. It seems like we can't have anger or discouragement, we must make STRONGER labels)<BR>No, she has never drawn blood. I have never been bruised. But she has struck me numerous times. She has broken things, like a wooden chair, and smashed a portable radio against the hard floor.<BR>But, if you must know about abuse, I would really accuse the counselor (male) of last summer who upon hearing of this (and of hearing of how I NEVER LAID A HAND ON HER, accused me (to her but would not admit to me that he said this to her) of emotional abuse. Obviously, I was furious, but because I was more or less forced into going into counseling, I kept going for a time.<BR>I am now in the process of filing a formal complaint against this counselor.<BR>In my own mind, I refer to his work as the "ogrefication of Roger." <BR>I wish to warn ALL men going into counseling that in a short time they can acrue tremendous power, so ALL MEN, WATCH OUT!<BR>At the very first session, make it clear that you will give them two sessions to make up a plan with you and your spouse to solve your problems, and if they can't agree to do this at the first session, let them you will NEVER BE BACK. You must take measures to limit their power, because many women (wives) will rely on them, introducing a major breach in you relationship.<BR>It may be possible that some women fall into two groups: those who fear speaking up with their husband present, because as wives they are generally the suffer in silence type and dealing with a problem is too hard, and the second type, the noisy or nagger type, who will verbally whip you about regarding various not so important things, but sre still afraid of letting you know what is important to them.<BR>Good luck, Cindy<BR>R

Yes and no. I have been hit - but she isn't strong enough to hutrt me.