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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 3,788
J
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 3,788
Ok folks. My weekend was really nice and I'll post about that part on the self improvement thread. However, need MAJOR PRAYER AND ADVICE HERE..

Here goes: H has this weekend of visitation w/my son, age 4. He is supposed to ask permission when crossing state lines. My IL's live in TN, approximately 40 to 50 miles from FOW's residence. They've been broken up supposedly for two to three months now. However, H claims they are friends till and occasionally talk.

H informs me on Fri. morning that he will be taking son for long weekend to his parents home in TN. Will return son on Monday evening but I will pick up son from school on Tues. I am not sure, but think this is possibly a way for STBX to see monkey (OW).

Please pray God keep my son and my StbXH safe and pray a hedge of protection around them. This is a very long weekend to spend on a farm like place. I can just imagine the grandparents, who are supportive of STBX irregardless now of his actions (this time last year they were in my corner) offer to babysit my son while WH goes out to pay a visit to his Old Friend. \

I know I probably will have to accept D as the outcome here b/c no little growth or change from STBXH. Although last week, he came over and gave vague reasons about a future reconcialiation between us and for one evening acted like a H, this happens. Only reason I allowed son to go out of state is b/c if I am too hard on StBXH about that, he can permit me from wanting to take son out of state at a later time.

Needed much prayer and advice ok?

Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 99
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Posts: 99
Peach:

If you are confident that the IL's will protectful of son and STBXH will be responsible, that is about all we can pray for. Does your sep. agreement state that son cannot be exposed to OW in anyway?

My biggest hurdle is to let go of trying to control how STBXW behaves. As long as she offers a stable, safe environment for kids, that is what court looks at.

Feeling angry is another matter though! My thoughts and prayers are with you. I know exactly how you feel.

Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 3,788
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 3,788
Thanks. But OW isnot to be around son as per my attorney. And about your MIL- just think you should not be in the middle of it all. It will just make things murkier for you.

What do you guys think? Thank you for praying. Do you think STBX is there and has seen OW? I could probably accept anything except this OW as permanent in my son's life. Personally, last year I asked her to stay away from my son and she didn't she is a liar and a very selfish woman who put the emotional needs of my child waaaay behind hers when son was to go on Disney trip w/dad and OW went along. What kind of vacation is that and then tell your son not to talk about it? Hurtful and damaging and that is why I will not legally nor morally allow this awful woman to do that.

Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 3,788
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 3,788
Ok. I really need input folks. Please? And prayers. I have been doing so well and this whole TN thing has got me soooo down today. I have tried to distract myself and feel better, prayed, etc. Getting ready to go for a really long walk after this and will check in with you guys later on.

Please pray for a hedge of thorns around my son and STBXH. Also pray for one around the monkey, so she will stick to her first good idea and stay away from my family for good.

Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 99
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Posts: 99
Peach:

I pray that you are pulling through ok. I think I know what you are feeling...anger, mistrust, a lot of anxiety over your son. Not trusting the monkey as far as you can throw her...

It seems these are normal reactions. I would feel like calling the monkey and telling her if she f---s around at all you I would drive up there and smack a fence post upside her monkey head.

That is the way I would feel...and that is the way I feel about OM. STBXW has told me, her mom and everyone else that she has split up. I checked her voice mail today and find out people refer to him as WS's "beau". That they are in fact still dating...yet another lie...

I totally empathize with you...I would not trust my children alone with her unless she is monitored...she has run off before and left them at home alone to visit her beau when I was on a business trip.

My prayers are with you...try to read, watch a movie, call them to hear your son's voice (if that is allowed)...

Pete

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 324
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 324
I know you will think i am crazy, but what about a cell phone one of the pay now talk later kind. He at least could call you and you would know he was ok. God knows i know how you feel.


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