Hello im new, I have a history with marriage builders, my wife went here all the time, and we got some good advice. I however am a controller and I have been abusive to my wife and her son from another marriage.

Long story short, I lost them, she wants a divorce because of my past actions, and I have been a lousy husband, a beast! And the lowest form of a father.

I am coming here to bring it out into the open and try to find atonement for the pain I have caused. After she was gone I realized what I had done,

Im ready for the flames and the criticism. I know I deserve it, in the end I hope to find peace with her decision for divorce. I don’t think she will ever want me back. I wish it were otherwise because I feel like she is worth a life time of waiting for. I would like to change. Give here the time to heal and perhaps if fate will let me try again.

I would like to say just one more thing. She always said I had no idea what I had. She was right, because now that she is gone, life has lost allot of meaning, and all that is left is this huge gapping maw where love once was.

Ruak,
You have been humbled, hugh?
I certainly know little of your situation, but I have had experience with this.
Get ready to be burnt by the flames.
This woman loved you and trusted you, even with her child. A child. An innocent, small, fragile human being placed in your care to be loved and taught by you.
Do you know what the Webster's definition of wicked is? What about Evil?
What did you give this woman? What did you give her child? Whatb did you recieve from them?
If you want to be differant in the future, true repentance is nessessary. You cannot be healed without owning your wrong doing. Agree?
If so, give us a little more info or admittance of wrong doing. Everyone will help you. But its up to all of us to make adjustments in our lives to be productive and purposeful.
We all do wrong and make mistakes and have personal failures that have hurt others. You have come to the right place.