Ok, I just noticed this post...I'm a little slow! LOL

My good thing for today.....I called my husband at work and for no reason, just because he wanted to, he reminded me that I'm the love of his life! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Mitzi <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Well, today was one of those days. Oldest son had a tough morning. Just sad and angry about nothing and everything. Couldn't get him to talk about it at all. Been this way since I picked him up from his mom's on Monday evening. Told wife and she said she would keep an eye on him. Rest of day was pretty uneventful.

Went to Divorce Care group at church. Was on depression. Man do I remember that phase. I still get teary every once in a while. Like tonight after group, I just didn't want to go home so I went to a pool hall and shot for an hour. Got hit pretty hard by some of the things she said about me causing it all. I know I didn't but even to have caused enough for her to perceive that I caused it all hurts.

Anyway, good thing......

Went to lunch with a couple of friends. It was great. We are all in the same class, and all are looking for jobs currently. Well, one of us already has a job. She is waiting here until her boyfriend finishes his residency. All in all, was a pretty good lunch.

Good thing here...My nausea is better. Son is sleeping on couch. No fever for him and no nausea either. I ate one half of a club sandwich. Man when you have no food, anything tastes like a four star meal. Hence, why I am worried about dating. The first really nice guy may seem like prince charming when compared to Austin.

Good thing...Because I've been off for three days and could barely stand up today, the practice has scheduled my first patient at 11 tomorrow to let me sleep in a little. This will really help. Only scheduled five patients for me to see. Am doing a tiny bit better but I feel the stomach thing coming on a gain. I wanted to get off 10 lbs, but NOT THIS WAY...lol..I am achy and feverish. Gosh, what I would give for a back rub. my lower sacrial area is just killing me. Found a killer website for screen savers. Scubamom.com. You can download stuff from her dives or from the luxury resorts she's visited. REally cool. I am feeling queasy. Gotta go...

But at least I have lost five pounds... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

More good news at work. Not only does my new boss respect what I do (as I mentioned yesterday), I found out today that he wants me more involved in creative meetings, and my role in the company could be expanded!

Also, good news from my daughter! She called today, and I asked her if she was still planning on coming over next weekend. She said "yeah, but can I come over this weekend, too?"

It seems like a little thing, but to me, it is HUGE!

My good thing. I did not tell a single lie, generalization or embellishment all day. I was even in a performance situation with all the opportunity to make a great story sound even better. But I did not stray from the truth.

For me this was Day one.

T

I am extremely thankful that you all have been posting. It is great to see the little things in with the big for us all.

Tryingreally hard - That is great. I am proud of you. I know that my wife was a definite embellisher and it caused us great problems, because nothing she said was something that I felt completely able to take at face fvalue. I always had to think, "What really happened and how much of this is real versus just her cant on the issue?"

Good thing - Went out tonight and tried really hard to NOT meet anyone. Last week was too close a call. Had fun, found a new spot where the people were much more similar to me and my age. But EVERYONE smokes it seems. I guess I can look at it as job security for me, but I don't want to be my wife's doctor.

Anyway, was complimented several times today on my shirt. Brown, textured silk worn with linen pants. Felt pretty good, and two women came up to me at the restraunt and told me that they loved my 'Look'. Anyway, getting ready to go to the Bahamas next Thursday. Dreading telling my wife. Afraid I will come home to a burned down house or worse, some stupid order about the kids. She is so vendictive, and I have absolutely NO trust in her what-so-ever. But, I can't live my life worrying about her any longer. I did that for 11 years, and will never do it again. She is on her own, and will have to make her own way in the world. She will be marrying very soon I suspect. she is so weak, that without someone, I think she will HAVE to marry just to survive. Not financially, but emotionally. She hasn't been alone for more than a day since Highschool.

Me, I went to the gym, had a great shoulder/chest/arms workout and then tanned for a few minutes. Don't want to be Mr. Whitey on the beach. I feel good about my outward appearance, and I think that my inner self is progressing along as well. Hopefully, when this is all said and done, I will be able to pick up myself, dust off, and return to life, maybe looking for someone along the way.

I'm in the process of refinancing my house. It looks like my interest rate might drop almost 3 percent. I will be able to pay tuition and consider buying a less old car.

First, I will have to do some serious saving.

But, I am driving an ancient (1986) car that needs way more work than the car is worth. But it runs. And it gets me there. And life could be worse.

Good thing:

Son is home and asked to SNACK ON SOME BROCCOLI!! Can you believe this or what??? i have encouraged him to eat healthy and he loves to...

We are going to go and get sushi tonight. I am feeling a bit better now. The office didn't schedule my first patient until 11 today so I had a little time to sleep in. They were so happy to see me doing better. After I picke dup son from school, we went to the church's pumpkin patch and bought a "little spookie" pumpkin. A medium sized pumpkin with some stickers to decorate it. This is his little pumpkin. Our big one is on the front porch.

The crab, Shelldey, is still alive. He is actually kinda noisy in his aquarium. Hey FC--you could brings crabs back to your boys after the beach...lol... But I am sure they would rather prefer a cool toy from Atlantis. Am still wondering when you are going to either hop a plane to atl or drive that vette down south all right?

Love and hugs to all this weekend. Stay warm and know that friends make all the difference in the world...

Ok...so sushi was a bad idea. Just got in and BINGO. Rushed it too soon after the flu. Took two giant steps forward by eating the sushi. Took THREE giant steps back by having a stomach situation like no other...lol.

You get so dad gum hungry after being npo (forced anyway) witht the flu. Anything and everything can look good to you. And you go overboard doing something so stupid. Like me eating a volcano roll. (my favorite). My stomach is certainly not forgiving me this time. Thought all of you certainly deserve a little friday nite humor.

Son is in front of fireplace. We have a nice toasty fire going. And I feel totally gross. Hope all is better in am so I can resume aerobics.

Missed my post for yesterday. Picked up my youngest boy from school about 11 as I do every Friday. Went for Chinese at his request. Found a great new Buffet.

Oldest son went to a movie with his mom. She brought him over afterward. Had some pasta that didn't turn out all that good. It was premade ravioli and I just made a quick red sauce, but it was cheese ravioli so I should have made alfredo, so didn't turn out so great. Also, I think the ravioli itself was somewhat weak.

We just laid on the floor and hung out watching TV lastnight. It was fun. 12 minutes of quiet intermixed with about 3 minutes of mayhem, wedgies, tickle-fests, wresting matches, etc. all night. Then we all went to bed. They wanted to sleep with me, so we all climbed into bed and my youngest essentially slept on me all night. Was GREAT !!! But I realized I have to get a King bed instead of this queen.

That is hilarious...And I saw something this morning that made me laugh so much..

FC--so you are a guy who likes to cook huh? Do you watch Martha Stewart's cooking show? She says "IT'S A GOOD THING" all the time. And that is the name of this thread...Good thing a day. Since posting on this thread, I have found myself saying to son, to friends, etc, "it's a good thing". This morning my girlfriend called me from a med. thing in chicago she is at. I said it to her and she told me that I "have got to stop with the martha stewart thing". And I replied to her "at least I didn't get insider trading tips--not a good thing." lmao.

So you started something wierd with the name of this thread. It is hysterical now to my friends. And I am going to go get coffee but NOT DO ANYTHING TO PUSH ANYTHING FURTHER. Heck, if the guy is our age and single still, he will still be there in a few months..At least I think so. But Rome wasn't built in a day. We are getting ready to go to this greenbelt area and ride son's bike. I already did aerobics combined with weight interval training this morning. Ate some tuna salad (very low fat) for lunch. I am really getting into the "body for life" thing. It is really fun. Before we venture out, I am going to mop the floor in kitchen.

Oh, and I goofed up on pancakes this morning. Am usually the queen of pancakes. As martha would say if she saw my pancakes this morning " your pancakes were anything but a good thing, dear". I ran out of egg beaters. So I made pancakes without any egg. They were like a brick or too thin. First I tried them a little thicker. They were like a lump of dough. Then I added a bit of water. Too thin. But they made breakfast like crepes. Son kept saying, "mommy what's wrong with your pancakes?" I had to come clean and told him about the eggs. He said "they will give us eggs at waffle house". But instead he ate some cereal. Told him before church tomorrow we can brave the waffle house next to the church.

So today is pretty good. IT'S A GOOD THING....

Okay, this happened Friday Oct. 18th.

I leave for work at 4am to beat the traffic (I live 90 miles away and work is in LA) and I always give my W a good-bye kiss and ILY before I go. Well this time she says, "Do you have time for sex?" And I say, "Well, if your offering, I'm accepting!" So I dropped trou and we went at it. Let me tell you, there's nothing better than getting a "quickie" to start your day off!

Later, at work, during a regional conference call, I hear my name listed as one of the Employee of the Quarter award recipients! I was so shocked! My name goes on a Quarterly Awards plaque on display at the Main Office, along-side the names of the other recipients, and I get $100!! Not bad!

On a more minor note. The Biaxin is kicking butt on this illness I have had for 2 weeks. The Amoxicillin just didn't quite knock it totally out of my system. I am beginning to feel normal once again.

I haven't gained any weight in the last 2 months even though I feel like I am eating more than I have been lately. So I am holding steady at around 200 pounds. (That's 45 pounds lighter than I weighed back in March, which was D-Day month). So I feel good about that. My final goal is 185lbs with a 35"-36" waist. I have come down from a 44" waist to a 38" waist so far this year, so I think my final goal is achievable.

Check out my weight loss pictures here:

http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?username=scottman18

Then chose "My Album-3Pics" then the Slideshow.

I am focusing more on what's positive in my life and I am happier for it! Nice Post!

<small>[ October 19, 2002, 02:15 PM: Message edited by: Blind Sided ]</small>

Well, the old saying goes "it never rains, but it pours."

That could not be more true for me right now. I posted a couple of days ago that I had met someone through the online dating thingy that I really clicked with over the phone. We're supposed to meet next week.

Yesterday, a friend of mine called me and handed the phone to this woman he's been trying to hook me up with. We hit it off, and she wants to meet sometime soon.

Today, I got an e-mail in my box from another woman! So far, I've been on this online dating service for almost a month. I've sent out dozens of e-mails, and got very few responses...mostly "thanks, but no thanks." Not one person has responded directly to my ad...until now, that is!

So if I can manage to make it all work, I'll have more dates in the next week or so than I've had all year! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

CJack, keep us posted... most interesting!

Okay, today I went with my visiting parents downtown, drove by the White House, Washington Monument, US Capitol building and then went shopping! It was a nice day. NO SNIPER SHOOTING YET TODAY! Let's hope s/he is GONE!

Cheers,
Nicole

<small>[ October 19, 2002, 08:09 PM: Message edited by: OvrCs ]</small>

Can I play, too?

The first good thing: Saturday morning dh walked into the kitchen, then turned around and looked at me and said "I want to renew our vows in February." I just melted and almost cried. It was so sweet.

The second good thing: This morning I woke up early, took a shower and slid back into bed with hubby for a 'good morning...um kiss' if ya know what I mean.

The other good thing: Hubby starts a new job today...after being out of work for 4 months! Woo-hoo!

Havn't posted in a couple days. Been a bit of turmoil in my thinking after a sermon on Saturday evening about divorce.

Good thing for yesterday...
My oldest boy is in the local Challenge program. So they tend to do twice the work with twice the difficulty. Anyway, he had two big projects that needed to be completed by this morning. He is 9 years old and we worked on them from 11 am to 10:30 pm with only a couple 30 minute breaks. I was so proud of him, because he just stuck with it and kept working. Even when he complained about it, he did so in a light hearted, "I know I am going to do it, but man oh man" kind of way.

And then there is my youngest, age 5. He didn't have anyone to play with almost all day. I tried to keep him occupied with coloring, Rescue Heros, and the computer, but that was only about 4 hours worth. He didn't watch TV, but he did read his 'Bible', a story book. He would come in and watch us for a while, then amble off and do something entirely on his own. I never once had to ask him to go do something, or find something else.

My boys were absolutely at the best I have ever seen them in all respects. I truly think God was with us, given the difficulty for all of us in getting this done. In my oldest for keeping going and not getting down about the volume and difficulty. In my youngest, in helping him to find things to be occupied and not feel left out and disregarded. And in me for seeing the good that was going on and not taking over my oldest boy's project 'just to get it done'.

I love them so much, I can hardly stand it sometimes. I am absolutely lucky to have them in my life.

Good thing today....

I discussed some things with my wife. Opening the door, but not forcing anything. On Saturday, the sermon was on divorce, basically, if at all possible, DON'T DO IT.

The pastor brought up a good point for me. My wife filed, but has since not done anything further as far as I know. She may be doing things, but I just have not heard about anything. Anyway, I have been getting aggitated with her affair and thinking that if our marriage is over, why not just go ahead and push it through myself. But during this sermon, he said something that I felt was profound. He said, "Who are you (me) to say that this marriage that God has blessed cannot be helped by him. Cannot be restored by God. That your love cannot be restored."

It really made me think. Although, I would love for a marriage that was full of love and respect, who am I to say that God doesn't have the power to restore this one to that level. Now I am not saying that I expect to wait forever, but I have not spoken to my wife in 3 months about our marriage, just about our divorce. Well, I talked to her this morning. Not to restore it, but to let her know that even though she might feel that it is hopeless, that with God's help, I am not sure that it is over. That with the emmense faith that I have in God, the right attitudes and convictions between both of us could restore a wonderful marriage. Not that it would be without siginificant work and ability to just let go of the past for both of us. I would have to let go of the affairs completely. She would have to let go of the 'neglect' that she felt. While we would need to learn from it, we couldn't use it as any sort of justification of our current behavior.

I don't know what will happen. I am not begging for an attempt. We both would have to prove to each other our sincerity before we could ever even consider anything further. And I am not sure nor even hopeful for that matter, that she will even be able to think about it, much less put it into action.

But I feel peaceful for the first time in a long time. I know that I have done absolutely everything possible. I have reopened the door that she may have thought I had nailed shut. She may slam it in my face, close it gently, or peek through. But for the first time, I will be completely OK with whatever happens. I hold hope, but not for reconciliation, because that would only lead to reseparation. We could START OVER but nothing short of that. I can't live with our past and neither can she. And that is OK I have realized, if the future isn't a repeat of that past. But I absolutely can hold my head up when my boys ask me about what happened in the future. I can look them in the eye and tell them everything that I did to preserve and help our marriage to grow. I can look at them and smile saying that when the marriage was crumbling, I did not shirk my duties to them nor to her, but stood fast until the end. This is not why I did it, I talked to her because I meant it, but these things are fortunate side effects if our marriage fails. My boys will be OK. I will be OK. She may be OK, I just don't know. I hope so.

I will see what the next couple of weeks bring, then move on. I hope that God will not think that I am trying to take his job if at that time I move ahead if nothing changes between now and then. I hope that he will see my heart and not look down on me with contempt for ending the marriage should that occur. I never thought about it like that until this sermon. Wow, this puts a whole new slant on this issue for me.

Well, who knows, maybe something will change in us that will allow for some further talking about what each of us would require for anything further to come about. We could not pick up like last time. We would have to both be safe for some time, meeting each others safety needs first and foremost. If this could not occur to mutual satisfaction, then nothing else could happen anyway. But if she ever would even consider thinking about it, we could at least if nothing else, see just what we would each need in order to take a step towards each other again.

But I truly felt more peaceful about everything today than I have in the last year. No matter what happens, I am OK. Things that I might wish may or may not bear fruit. But if it does not, I can still smell the blossoms as I pass by.

Peace be with you. I hope that you will have a day like I have had today.

<small>[ October 21, 2002, 11:39 PM: Message edited by: Formerly Confused ]</small>

Well the first woman (the one I had so much in common with that it was eerie) called me tonight. Perhaps it was just coincidence, but I was holding her phone number in my hand, getting ready to call her!

We're meeting for dinner tomorrow night. Wish me luck!

I have a job interview this afternoon.

I realize I won't get an offer because I am not a minority member and I don't have a business background. But I like the practice. And you never know.

So, wish me well. Prayers also welcome.

this is a good post. i like the positivity. the opporunity to be grateful... it's nice to see praise reports.

Well, let's see...God is still blessing me and that is praiseworthy. after a major struggle with being divorced, i have moved to AZ. God has really come through for me here. i have a job i love. it's just me and my daughter here, but i am not alone and that's good. i have joined a good church and i have made a couple of friends. i have even become close with a poster on the EN board. we are roommates!!! all in all things are better today then they were yesterday and i know they will better tomorrow then they are today... praise God for that...

Went to my Oldest boy's Parent/teacher conference today. Both me and my wife were there. No animosity at all. His teacher said that he is doing great, but needs to work on his organization and drive. These are both things that I have already known needed working, but have yet to come up with something that has helped.

The rest of the day, he and I went golfing. This is the first time in a while that he and I spent time just to ourselves. Usually, my youngest boys is with us, which is generally fine, but it was nice just giving him all my attention. He played great. And actually, I played pretty well since I wasn't trying to hit it as far, I actually hit really safely and stayed in the short grass all but one stroke.

All in all was a wonderful day. My good feelings and calmness from yesterday have continued today. Still have no idea what will be happening, but I am OK with whatever it is going to be. I have come to a place that I can accept whatever she wants because I have done absolutely everything that I can to let her know how I feel and what I am capable of doing. Whether she responds or just continues on is strictly on her shoulders at this point.

Peace be with you. I hope that you have had a day like mine has been today as well.