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A frog telephones a Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."
The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party or what?"
"No..." says the psychic,
"...Next semester, in her biology class."
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Cute.
Jester, I've been missing you.
Drop me a line - same addy - and let me know how you and the girls are.
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MAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
You're sitting at the breakfast table and:
You're on the cover of Forbes. Your son is on the box of Wheaties. Your mistress is on the cover of Playboy. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> Your wife is on the back of the milk carton. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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TENNIS BALLS
One day while jogging, a man noticed two tennis balls lying by the side of the road. He picked the balls up, put them in his pocket and proceeded on his way.
Waiting at the cross street for the light to change, he noticed a beautiful blonde standing next to him and smiling.
"What are those big bulges in your running shorts?" she asked.
"Tennis balls," answered the man, smiling back.
"Wow," said the blonde, looking upset, "that must hurt. I once had tennis elbow and the pain was unbearable."
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A SHAVE & A SHINE
A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber's chair and said, "I'll have a shave and a shoe shine."
The barber began to lather his face and sharpen the old straight edge while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts that he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes.
The cowboy said, "Young lady, you and I should go and spend some time in a hotel room."
She replied, "I'm married and my husband wouldn't like that.
The cowboy said, "Tell him you're working overtime and I'll pay you the difference."
She said, "You tell him. He's the one shaving you."
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<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
Thanks!!! I'm glad I lurked today... I needed these today!!!
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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Wild Bill,
There seems to be a "breast theme" going on in this thread. Would Billy be needing a trip to Hooters this weekend???????? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />
#48 rules!
PP
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A few from: Top 17 Bumper Stickers You Would Like To See
Impotence...Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings".
Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted.
Guys...just because you have one, doesn't mean you have to be one.
Try not to let your mind wander...it is too small and fragile to be out by itself.
Everyone has a photographic memory...some just don't have any film.
Save your breath...you'll need it to blow up your date.
I used to have a handle on life...but it broke off.
WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
This one is for you Bill:
Nebraska Cornhusker Football 2002 $uck$. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
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HOW ABOUT A LITTLE BLONDE HUMOR
A blonde wanted to sell her car, but couldn't find any buyers. She called her friend for advice, and her friend asked her how many miles she had on her car. The blonde replied, "235,000 miles."
Her friend told her that was the problem. But the blonde's friend also told her that her brother is a mechanic and could put back the miles to whatever she wanted. So the blonde went to the mechanic and told him to set the miles to 40,000.
Two days later, the blonde's friend asked her if she had sold the car since her brother dropped the miles. The blonde told her, "Why would I sell the car? There are only 40,000 miles on it!"
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LOL... but make that my exh... and you got a knee slapper... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by idostylin: <strong>LOL... but make that my exh... and you got a knee slapper... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">hahahahha. Mine too.
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