I am so upset right now I don't know what to do. I called wife tonite to talk about kids and to suggest that I could drive up on my days off(I work a 12 hour swing shift and have 15 days off a month) to help with kids homework to take some of the burden off her. I know what it is like to be a single parent plus I really miss being involved with kids homework and stuff. Before I got to the homework stuff she told me she is engaged and it happened 2 weeks ago. I was so upset I hung up.

She hasn't known this guy but three months. I have proof that she has been to an internet dating site within the last couple days. I Love her with all my heart and I would do anything for her still.

Pray for me guys and girls as I believe with all my heart she is making a mistake. If she could only see how I have changed for real this time we could put our family back together.

I just need lots of prayer for God to deliver me through this trial and bring me out of this dark valley.

I am still praying for the restoration of my marriage.

Love in Christ
cajunky

{{{cajunky}}}
I'm praying for you and your ex-wife. You've come so far. Don't lose faith now. I don't know much about sexaholics anonymous, but another 12-step program, AlAnon, has really saved my life through all this. Trust in God's plan for you.

Letstry....Don't worry my faith has never been stronger. God keeps telling me to be patient and keep going on the path I am on and he will take care of me. I can't tell you how many scriptures I have read about how God is going to take care of this situation.

I just need God to show me something else to lift me up and I know he will.

Love in Christ
cajunky

More prayers comig your way.......

This is incredible news for sure, but God will give you the strength to handle it.

You need to be there for your kids, now more than ever. You should insist on being with them as much as you can - up to half the month - especially now.

They need stability and a loving parent who is thnking about them - and not just about themselves.

Sometimes it's hard to know why some things happen - for who knows the ways of God - but you are right - it's too soon for an engagement - she's still in the infatuation stage.

Be strong for your kids, especially if this guy doesn't work out, which he probably won't - adn maybe exw needs to see that for herself.

K

Cajunky,

I want to encourage you as well to keep hanging in there. You are such a inspiration to me; your dedication and love for your XW, and your comittment to do what you can to reconcile. It's like an unreal 'dream-come-true' to my love-starved heart. Can't even IMAGINE that kind of attitude from my WH. Keep on reading all you can, and stay close to God. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> You WILL get through this as well. It isn't over until it's over.... And I believe (suspect you do too) that if it doesn't end the way we would have wanted it too, God will guide us in a new and good direction. One that will grant us 'fullness of joy'. I'll keep you in my prayers.

(AKA Dodger)Hang in there pal. You have been an inspiration to me. I too am hoping for reconciliation. I will pray for you along with my own needs. Do not give up. There are many cases where the ex does something like this and it falls apart. Be the man that you are and the Lord will provide what you need.

CAJUNKY! I sympathize with you. You've been there to help and certainly with good posts for the rest of us to read. I hope you don't take this the wrong way but...
Looks like your ex is fixin' to get herself another guy to cheat on (later on in her new 'life' with him) and break his heart too. I guess she really believes that finding somebody else is going to 'cure all ills'?? Perhaps this guy won't be as nice to her as you have been...
Something for HER to think about...
Harold

Thanks for the response guys. I KNOW God is going to take care of me through this. It just pains me so much knowing what wife really wants is for our family to be like it was.

I prayed about it last nite for direction from God and he let me know that I couldn't give up. I am still going to be there whenever I can to help with my kids and to be the best dad and person I can be. God will take care of the rest.

Yes, I do love my wife very, very, very much. God has giving me so much through the last 10 months I would be a fool to give up on him now.

I am glad I have been such an inspiration to you guys but it is not me it is God working through me. Lets just say I am an example of a WS who God has taken hold of and totally changed his life. One that has totally changed his thinking and attitude on a lot of things. I honestly pray for all WS to have the kind of change that I have had and for all BS to have the kind of faith and perseverance that you have.

Just remember GOD IS GOOD

Love in Christ
cajunky

<small>[ October 18, 2002, 08:52 AM: Message edited by: cajunky ]</small>

Hello, CAJ.....I am very sorry to hear of your news.

What can a person say, except that I will pray and hope for the best. My ex is is such a deep fog, too. This is all too sad and I feel that I am going to breakdown at work today....we all deserve a little breakdown...don't we?

Please let me know how you are doing. c++

Cajunky,
I am so sorry to hear about what has happened.

Your wife is in a deep deep fog, for her to make a commitment like that so quickly.
Lean on the Lord and allow him to carry you through this... let his will be done, no matter what the outcome.
Prayers for you as well as your wife and children.
May God be with you always.
Stay Strong!
Wallace

cajunky,

I am so sorry to hear about what's going on. But we know that you're in God's hands, He's got a plan ( Jer. 29:11). And your faithfulness will be blessed. You are in my prayers today my friend as is your W and kids.

S&C

Am praying for you right now. Touching this cold screen but sending a prayer through for your family. This sounds really too soon. Doesn't sound like she may be too sure about this. Very spur of the moment. Mr. Gi Joe must have been working overtime, hunting on the internet to find his mrs. right. But you have got to be strong.

We need to find a way for her to get it through her head that you are different. Different from the inside out. How has she been able to see that? I do not know. But there needs to be something done soon. Have you done MB counseling? That would be a good strategic start here. This needs to be immediately addressed...

Until there is a clear cut approach, I will just keep on praying. Don't let your heart get ahead of your head now. I think this is an impulsive reaction from you xW. Think this guy was searching for ms. right now. Three months is just not using his head either. Destined for doom.

Cajunky,

I'm here praying for you too, my brother.

Please remember that God is STILL in control!! He knows. He knows what W is doing, He knows HOW He's going to touch her and turn her around.

Sometimes, when satan knows his time is short, he pulls out all the stops, trying to thwart God's plan (Rev. 12:12). I think this is what is going on. All this happened right when we start praying for restoration of your M? Hmmm. I think we've got satan on the run!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I think we can all relate to the circumstance looking like it's going totally in the wrong direction. Gotta just keep pushing through. We have a saying in our church...GOTTA PUSH!

Pray
Until
Something
Happens

P
U
S
H

Cool, huh!??!?!?! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

Hang in there, and LEAN totally on Jesus. He's got your back!!

I think God worked for me this weekend. I haven't been to see my brothers new house 4 hours away and I went to see it for the first time this weekend. He has lived there for 1.5 years. I know God planned this trip this weekend for me knowing what news I was going to receive thursday.

C++, Wallace....Thanks for your prayers.

Steadfast...I know God has a great plan for me but it is so hard making it through the valleys to see what it is. I pray everday that my wife is included in them.

Not peachy....All I can do is pray that God will show her the change in me and somehow make her know that she will be safe with me again. There is no other way but to leave it in Gods hands.

Lupo....WOW!! I really like the PUSH . The one thing that is making me get through this all is knowing God is in control.

Love in Christ
cajunky

<small>[ October 20, 2002, 11:30 PM: Message edited by: cajunky ]</small>

Cj, I am typically on GQII, but saw the reply with the PUSH analogy. I had received a longer version in my email a couple of years ago--the morning after I had literally fallen asleep praying asking God what direction I was to go in my life. I still look at it frequently when I need a reminder of the power of prayer, and thought I would share it with you......

A man was sleeping at night in his cabin when suddenly his room filled with light, and the Savior appeared. The Lord told the man he had work for him to do, and showed him a large rock in front of his cabin.

The Lord explained that the man was to push against the rock with all his might. This the man did, day after day. For many years he toiled from sun up to sun down, his shoulders set squarely against the cold, massive surface of the unmoving rock, pushing with all his might. Each night the man returned to his cabin sore, and worn out, feeling that his whole day had been spent in vain.

Since the man was showing signs of discouragement, the Adversary decided to enter the picture by placing thoughts into the man's weary mind: "You have been pushing against that rock for a long time, and it hasn't budged. Why kill yourself over this? You are never going to move it." Thus, giving the man the impression that the task was impossible and that he was a failure. These thoughts discouraged and disheartened the man.

"Why kill myself over this?" he thought. "I'll just put in my time, giving just the minimum effort; and that will be good enough." And that is what he planned to do, until one day he decided to make it a matter of prayer and take his troubled thoughts to the Lord.

"Lord," he said, "I have labored long and hard in your service, putting all my strength to do that which you have asked. Yet, after all this time, I have not even budged that rock by half a millimeter. What is wrong? Why am I failing?"

The Lord responded compassionately, "My friend, when I asked you to serve me and you accepted, I told you that your task was to push against the rock with all your strength, which you have done. Never once did I mention to you that I expected you to move it. Your task was to push. And now you come to me with your strength spent, thinking that you have failed. But is that really so? Look at yourself. Your arms are strong and muscled, your back is sinewy and brown, your hands are callused from constant pressure, and your legs have become massive and hard. Through opposition you have grown much, and your abilities now surpass that which you used to have. Yet you haven't moved the rock. But your calling was to be obedient and to push and to exercise your faith and trust in My wisdom. This you have done. I, my friend, will now move the rock."

At times, when we hear a word from God, we tend to use our own intellect to decipher what He wants, when actually what God wants is just simple obedience and faith in Him.... By all means, exercise the faith that moves mountains, but know that it is still God who moves the mountains.

When everything seems to go wrong ... just P.U.S.H.! When the job gets you down ... just P.U.S.H.! When people don't react the way you think they should ... just P.U.S.H.! When your money looks "gone" and the bills are due... just P.U.S.H.! When people just don't understand you...
Just P.U.S.H.!

P.U.S.H - Pray Until Something Happens!!

hurtinginil.....WOW, what an inspiring story. I really needed that today. I printed it off and I am going to use it for a bible study. I appreciate so much you sharing it with me.

Needless to say I am going to keep PUSHing.

Love in Christ
cajunky

Beautiful,
I'm sharing the story with my Minister. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
Thanks