My husband, who is 39, is very insecure. I am 43, and I am very confident. How do I help him become more secure about himself. I praise him, I tell him he's handsome, I do all those things, but he is still very insecure. I think it goes way back to his childhood, his father was very controlling. His mother also had an affair and left his father with 4 kids when my husband was 15. His insecurities and jealousies have caused alot of problems between us, they have drained alot of deposits out of my account. He has snooped in my purse behind my back, snooped in my wallet, my drawers, he actually smelled me one day when I was 15 minutes late,( due to traffic), he has called phone numbers from my cell phone that he did not recognize (it was my sons new number), he has read my outgoing e-mail without my consent, he has accused me of having an affair with a co-worker, because we were helping an Exchange employee from Germany get settled in the US (and I speak German),when my brother moved here from Germany, it bothered him that I went shopping with him one day (I hadn't spent any time alone with my brother in years). It bothered him that I helped my brother get settled in the US (a foreign country for him). Ironically, I have never done anything wrong, I do not go out with the girls, I spend all my time with my family, I severed all my friendships with male friends, because he asked me to (he does not beleive a male and female can have a platonic relationship), I do not look at other men, I am honest, and faithful and only want him and tell him that. It bothered him when I lost alot of weight last year, that I purchased padded bras (if I wouldn't wear a padded bra, I'd be flat as a board, and the bra is no bigger than what I was before losing the weight). It bothers him that I want to wear a skirt that has a slit in the front, it's the fashion, it's not a short skirt, it's a business suit and looks professional, I do not dress seductively, nor do I dress trashy. It bothered him when at the gym we go to, I pointed out a guy on a machine who really works out hard, you can not miss this guy because he moves so fast on the stepper, yet it bothered my H that I noticed him. I don't know what to do.
