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Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 717
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What a wild weekend......Wed. stbx announced that if I didn't drop the no contact order he would fight for custody. Friday I discovered 75 pages of court documents detailing sexual abuse of minor boys by stbx from before our marriage. Suddenly I saw red flags everywhere concerning my boys, allegations by others......I was sick. Today our divorce was settled out of court. I have sole custody of the children, he must have supervised visits and get treatment. All very sad, but an answer from God.
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Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 120
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Annavon:
Ouch, but ouch!! It must have hurt discovering the documents. I recall your earlier posts about the NCO. Do please take care of yourself and the children. Am sooo sorry to hear all this.
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Joined: Aug 1999
Posts: 6,107
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Oh my GOD.
AND THANK GOD... for His intervention in THAT ONE!
Wow!
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 3,303
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Wow and after all your ex's threats about proving you unfit... Hang in there, (((HUGS))) this must be such a shocker for you!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />
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Joined: Dec 2001
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Told the children tonite that they wouldn't be going to spend time with dad anymore.....the younger two were disappointed and upset. My oldest, 11 yr old boy, seemed very relieved. His whole personality changed, becoming happier and more relaxed and very affectionate (huggy) toward me. I told him they'd have supervised visits with dad and he said "you mean I have a bodyguard?" I just hope I did get him away from x in time. I am getting them into counseling, any other suggestions would be welcome.
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 9
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Annavon,
First, prayer and being open to God's instructions are my advice. He may lead you to read certain scriptures every day for the children or He may lead you to a specific counselor.
Also counseling for all of you. Make sure you are involved in that you have time with the counselor also. Take the time to find a Christian one who has similar beliefs and maybe a woman would feel safer to your boys.
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Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 1,168
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Goodness, things happened fast for you! I am so proud of you for getting yourself and your kids out of a dangerous situation. Now for the divorce to be all said and done. It doesn't seem that long ago that you separated. You really made some tracks here.
It's a relief to know the courts sided with you for the custody issue. It probably won't mean the end of your problems. He may pester you until he lands his butt in jail. I've read your posts in the past, but I'm a little fuzzy on the details. My recollection is he had problems with the law earlier in life that you knew about. Is that correct? Was the information in the court documents something you didn't know about previously? I hope all the best for you and your kids.
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
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Annavon,
God bless you and your family.
I hope the closure on the custody issue helps in your healing. Please seek counseling for all of you.
We have all suffered events that we could never have imagined before, and we are stronger for it.
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Joined: Dec 2001
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Yes, I knew he'd had problems with drugs and alcohol and his first marriage......but he had become a Christian since then. I met him at a Bible camp where he was a boys counselor....why would I suspect anything?
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Joined: Oct 2001
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Flabbergasted. I hardly ever use that word. Right now I am really thankful for that intuition I had that I should help convince you to leave your abusive XH. Apparently the abuse went well beyond my wildest fears. Recalled something related to this from a while back. Here it is. <small>[ November 05, 2002, 10:49 PM: Message edited by: ex-Princess Buttercup ]</small>
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