Well my D takes place in two weeks. I can't believe it right around the corner, but it is. I need to tell my boys what's going to happen. Does any one have any good advice on this? I spoke to my tharapist yesterday and he said what I was going to say to them seemed fine.

If you have something to share, please let me know.

Dino

I don't know the age of your children, but I defer to books.
I have "How to talk to your children about divorce" - This is a small, easy to read book.
The Sandcastles Method of Talking to your Children About Divorce, and Mom's House, Dad's House.
I also have my girls in a Rainbows class, which is peer grief counseling for children of death and divorce. It really seems to help the 5 year old. They have all ages, and its free though a local church. I know its a national organization.
Good Luck.

Thanks Newly.

My children are 6 and 3. I will be talking to them within the next few days.

I have one other question - How did your children react after you told them about the D that was going to happen?

Dino

Some good children's books for that age are Dinosaurs Divorce, It's not Your Fault Koko Bear and Mama And Daddy Bear Divorce. They all put what is happening in children's story format with colorful pictures and easy to read words - basically they explain divorce as mommy and daddy not living in the same house anymore.

They talk about their feelings and how things will be different but that mommy and daddy still love them and that they can still love mom and dad.

They may not really understand until they live it. Be prepared for their feelings - tell them it's ok to feel the way they do and find ways to help them cope.

This isn't fun for the kids, some times a counselor helps - my 6 year old loves to talk to his - it's a neutral party who is not involved who they can trust - another trusted adult may work just as well.

The three year old should adjust pretty well, just don't make any sudden lifestyle changes - ease them into the changes gradually if you can.

K

My children, twin girls, 9, are taking it very well. The investigator has noted that we should be comended for raising such well adjusted children. They seem to be happy. Although the divorce still won't be final until April or May, (she moved out last May), it was a tough moment to actually tell them. Especially since I didn't want the divorce I had hope that thing would work out. So did my girls. Then once the papers were served and the process started we decided it was time to tell them. We both sat down with them and explained that mommy and daddy won't be living together ever again. We told them it is not their fault and things would be OK. I am in the middle of this huge custody battle right now. We are able to not expose the children to any of this. It was a very sad moment. I think if you pray and ask for guidence you will find a way.

Good luck.

Thanks K and STV.

I just want to make sure that I am there for both of them. My WW is still in la la land. I don't know how much she'll be able to help.

Dino