Dear friends,
wanted to let you know, whoever is interested, that my surgery 14 days ago, was succesful. Even patohistological finding is that ca was not spread wide (oh my English) and that "edges are clean" how we (MDs) say here.
I am recovering well, a bit prolonged bleeding, and hope that next week am going back to work.
I hope that PAP smear in March would be OK, if not I would have to go to histerectomy.
Dear cajunky and other friends from prayers group and all of others,
you helped me so much and I believe that your prayers had helped a great part of recovery.
Even my exH came on Friday to ask about my health (after 4+ month of no contact at all), he was rather cold and formal as we were business partners no husband and wife for 19 yrs, he didnt offer help, but at least came and spent few minutes with me. That probably doesnt mean anything but who knows...
I still miss him so much , especially these days when I was in pain (phisical but more emotional) and fear of future, we signed "in health and in illness" but he sibned that with OW too, and I realy hope she will never leave him to fight alone like he left me.
OMG when I saw him , I had a hope .......of course unreal, new baby, new wife are more important than the past.
Dont wanted to be boring,
thank you all
D

D-

I'm glad to hear that you got through your surgery okay and have the company of 1? of your kids. I haven't posted on any of your threads before but wanted to let you know that I'm praying for you. Stories like yours where adversity is dealt with is, as hard as it is to imagine, inspring to the rest of us. Thanks!

Glad to hear that you are recovering well. It is hard to face challenges alone, however, you have all of us on the MB board behind you!

Gos Bless,

D.

B&D,

I am so glad to hear you came through your surgery well. I'm sorry I haven't written lately but my computer got zapped by a thunderstorm and I lost all my e-mail addresses. It took me over 3 weeks to get the new computer up and running.

I'm doing about the same except I met a great guy who I like a bit too much right now. I'm really trying to take it slow but it feels so good, if you know what I mean. Well, I guess I don't mean that quite yet but just being close with someone is enough to put a silly schoolgirl grin on my face.

I hope you will write to me again soon. It's been a crazy year but it's almost up. My son's 7th birthday is tomorrow. Work is about the same. I'm going back to Iowa in mid-December. Perhaps I'll go by and see Mike while I'm there. Haven't seen nor heard from him since I came home from the mid-west this summer. I talk to Bill (lost husband) quite often and he has become one of my best far off friends. I do however miss e-mailing you, Jacky, Nicole and a few of the other old-timers from my dark days.

You may have read that my Ex got remarried 2 weeks ago. I asked him how married life was and he said , alright I guess. Not the "great" response I expected. This morning he asks me how my weekend was( he knew I was going out with my new friend). My response was "It was wonderful" the only regret I have is that is had to end.

Now, which one of us is happiest at the moment. I personally think I am. At least it seems that way on the surface.

It's funny how time heals things. I pray that time continues to heal you both physically and emotionally. By the way, I've put off my hysterectomy until Feb of next year. We change insurance companies 1-1 and I have a better benefit from waiting. Now I just have to put up with the pain and irratation for another 3 months.

My daughter got her orthodontic braces put on yesterday. Ex is refusing to pay toward them even though it is specifically listed in our agreement. I guess he lost too much gambling in Las Vegas on his honeymoon.

Other than that, nothing else going on here in lovely (yet rainy) South Carolina.

Talk to you soon. Good luck and God Bless You.

Lynn

B and D,

I am glad to hear that your surgery went well and that you have received some good news......it's about time!

I'm sorry that your ExH wasn't more receptive to your situation, but he's probably still in the fog.

Although you never know what is going on in their brains..........

You are a very strong woman, even if you don't think so. Your daughters will one day realize the tremendous example that you have set for them and be very proud and grateful.

May God continue to bring you healing and peace, and some happiness too. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> K

Dear friends,
again I am (not)surprised with MBfriendship. It's of great help.

litchfield
Thanks for prayers. Am not familiar with your story but hope that there is still a possibility of "happy end". Wish you all the best.

WGTT
Like I know and each time I am more convinced in that, MB friends are the best.
Thank you for caring. Wish you a lot of sunny days like hear on our Coast.

GIIC
You can for sure understand me but can you realy believe that this is only a fog or this is now a new real happiness for him?
Thank you for prayers and I realy hope that we all deserve a bit of happiness after all that mess we survived. Think you are the real winner. Maybe I'll be like you some day.

PP
When I come back to work I'll write you. I was really worried about you. It's not your characteristic not to answer my mails. Glad that you are so well. Am so happy for you to meet someone. But be careful.
Have hope that R will come in Dec (finally if he doesn't decide to make one more route) and maybe he'll make me a little happy for a change.
I am aware that I am still far for complete healing , especially emotionally and that the pathologist was right when said "You are well now, but if you do not change your thoughts, mental status...we'll see you here again".
BTW thru these 3 yrs my ex never said "I am great" only those phrases "It is how it is" "any relatioship is not ideal" "the baby needs so much attention that SHE hardly has time to cook, I don't remember that girls were like that"....and he became almost completely grey and has much less hair.
Enough about him.
I'll write you next week.
Wish you a lot of not-lonely days.

Love to all
D

B and D -

Is he still in the fog or found true happiness you ask.......

Well, I am the eternal optimist, but I definitely DO NOT think that he has found real happiness.

I think that these men must lack something to just leave one relationship for another, and I used to never believe it, but I can't honestly say that he won't do the same thing again, I mean if he can do it once for no particular reason, then what's to stop him from getting that wild hare again????

And my ex has gone almost completely gray too - and at 31 years of age. It was weird when I saw him last - usually he wears a hat.

But once again, fog? yes in a sense, but it may take them the rest of their lives to navigate out of it and happy? definitely not, and I don't believe that they really know what true happiness is.

I do however believe that WE know what true happiness is and therefore wil be able to find it.

Was recommended to work through the book Rebuilding by Fisher and Alberti - helps you become whole again as a single person.

I know that we don't want to ever admit it, but we can actually be ok without the WH and sometimes even better than OK, way better! And then we will see the WH stuck in their unhappy life.

Hope you continue to recover well. K

GIIC
thanks for sharing your optimism, unfortunately I was born pesymist (even dr Harley himself admitted me that it IS hard to live with the pesimist, in one e-mail). They say that can be changed but I haven't succeeded, yet.
I really hope for you to find new happiness cause I think you deserve it, after all you passed thru.
I am interested in this book Rebuilding but I live in a small European country and can't buy it.
Can you write some practical advices?
I forgot to mention but I hope you and the kids are well especially the baby. What strength you have!!!!
but I disagree at least for MY ex-he has found true happiness now, his new wife is completely opposite in every field , to me, so I think he has finally found what he missed thru our 21 yr.
Even YD who was the whole time with me beleiving daddy will come back, is now sure that they are much happier than we were, so tha there is no more possibility we ever be together and at the end she chose to live with them - sad.

love to you and kids
D

I had the vertical cut straight down. They were expecting cancer, but it turned out to be endometriosis & I had 1 ovary removed instead.
Luckily I did not have much pain, though it was very difficult moving around. COuld not sit down, get up easily etc. Doctor said no activity & bed rest for 6 weeks. I too had some bleeding when I went home for about the first 2 weeks & it stopped. It took more than 6 weeks for me to feel comfortable sitting & standing again & I still get exhausted easily.

Give yourself time to heal & don't rush it or you may end up back in the doctors office. Do you have cancer Somewhere? Do you have to get Radiation treatments? I hope not. I hope all will be well with future exams also.

I became very down mentally at that time and I am still. Try & have alot of company & dont hesitate to ask friends to help you until you become stronger again. Take Care.

ATW
Thank you for finding out the time and strength to care about me with all your problems which are really fresh and painful.
Yes, that was the cancer but they removed cervix of the uterus (I am MD and don't speak everyday English very well so I know only Latin name of the surgery: conizatio). It is thought as a minor surgery and for now I do not need any additional therapy but well see after 3 months if PAP smear shows neoplastic changes I would need hysterectomy. I hope that will not happen.
You know from my signature I am in the mess for 3yrs but i still love my ex and expected warmer reaction, some help, moral or financial (a month from work means lower salary) but he obviously has a new better life.
Hope for you there is still a hope of resolving your problems and escaping divorce.
Do not give up. I do not know your story but do not give up from your M.
Wish you all the best
D