Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum
This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at
mbrestored@gmail.com
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 26
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 26 |
I read somewhere that the difficult time is when WH is having trouble with the OW and comes back knocking on your door. Yes, he says he loves her. Yes, he is still seeing her. But he now says he is in love with me - BS. What to do? Please - will you share your experience on this?
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 247
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 247 |
I have been experiencing this myself. Don't criticise the OW. Listen if you like, but don't get your hopes up or expect anything to happen. Let him know you do love him. It may take time for their R to unravel, but it will.
Protect and take care of yourself. You know what you want and what you're willing to put up with. If you want him back do what you need to do. The better you are the more he'll realise what a mistake he made.
Do what it right for you, not what everybody tells you to do.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 26
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 26 |
Thanks so much for your post MOWL
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 26
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 26 |
Just wanted to mention that I have not and do not critize the OW. My husband is the one I hold responsible. We all have opportunities, but he made a conscience decision to act upon his desires. Who is to say he will not do so again?
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 247
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 247 |
gaiaa,
What I meant by not criticizing the OW was related to his complaints about her now. If he whines about her and their R to you just listen or if you don't feel like listening tell him "shouldn't you be saying these things to her instead of me?"
He probably complained about you and your M to her when he should have been talking to you. My personal opinion is A's can not handle reality very well. An A is built on lies and deceipt and everything being wonderful when they are together. All their troubles left behind. They don't realise the troubles follow them when they committ to the OP. When trouble crops up the WS and OP start to realise the grass isn't greener.
Ironically by having contact with your WS and listening to the talk about their R you are in a sense playing role of the OP.
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
|
1 members (Drb6317),
284
guests, and
96
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,623
Posts2,323,493
Members71,967
| |
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
|
|
|
|
|
|
