I have been reading and have posted a couple of times but I need some more insight on divorcing.

I am the BS in my relationship with my wife of 2 1/2 years. After I found out about the affair (lasted almost a year) we started marriage counseling and things were on the up and up. Then a month later I found out she was pregnant (I have been fixed for almost for a year).

After all this, I asked her to move out and we should still continue to go to MC but after two months I couldn't handle finding out about all the lies.

I called her one night crying and telling her that I didn't think it was going to work. I didn't know how to heal after everything I know was a lie. I told her that I was very hurt about the whole situation that I thought it would help me heal to move on. She really didn't believe or was in denial about it until I filed for divorce. There was about two days of begging me not to go (felt good) but that was it. I haven't talked to her in over a week and a half (which is also good and bad)

I miss my wife so much but I also can't cope with all the lies especially with the length of our marriage.

How long does this second guessing last? I have really good days and then I have days where I question what I am doing?

My wife told one of our friends that this is what I want and she thinks we are meant to be and grow old together. How the hell do I live with all the lies and not carry that baggage with me forever???

Confused, very confused.

Thanks for allowing me to vent again.

((((((((((WWTPE))))))))...I'm sorry, I can't give you any advice right now, because of where I'm at - only support. I hope and pray that can ease a bit of your pain. Please keep posting, if only to vent. It helps so much. Everyone is here for you. Remember that.