Hi
I have been paying chold support for a while and someone told me that there is a % amount that my ex wife has to the money into differant catagorys. I don't think I said that right. What I mean is, like if you pay 200.00 a week in chid support how much goes to housing, to food , clothing and so on, I think it's a %age can someone help me. Thanks.

Granted there could be some type of state mandate where you live, but to my knowledge, the only control you have over child support is writing the check.

There are some states that use a % of your income to determine the amount of child support.

Donny - I think you are confused because when they are setting up the child support - they ask you to fill out a form that you must write down what you pay for food, clothes, housing and etc... But I believe once the amount is in place it doesn't matter what it is spent on - You only give the money she doesn't have to give you an explanation as to what she spends it on - as long as the children are being taken care of. I think most states figure it out on a % of what each parent makes for a living plus the ages of the children etc.... Good luck

Lots of peiople get upset by how they see the child support being spent. Usually it is figured as a percentage of income vs. parenting time.

As long as the kids are getting decent housing, food and clothes, you really can't do much about how the actual money for child support is being spent.

Say you have $500/month. If the ex takes that & buys a new car, then what? The house payment, food and clothes came from somewhere. She is still paying $800 (for rent, $600 for food & $150 for clothes with a proportional amount of those directly for the children. As long as the above is provided, then what is there really to complain about.

Yeah it really stinks to see the ex be able to afford a new car ONLY because of child support. But if they had no children (and remember, you helped in that department), they could get a car.

Sometimes, if you can show they are not spending what they get on the children, you can get support reduced. An example would be if they get free housing or child care from an employer or if they get a place which is much lower rent.

One way to get it changed is if there is a signifcant change in income (yours or theirs). Usually it has to be more that 10%.

<small>[ November 25, 2002, 02:45 PM: Message edited by: Chris (CA123) ]</small>

moved from Al. to Jax. Fl. X is court order to pay Dr. Rx & half of son school. I have always paid then he repays me. Since we moved & he moved in with OW he wont pay anything, wants to pay them directly. There is no way to do the Dr they want their co-payment first, cant wait days to get money for Rx. We live 7 hrs away. New Attorney said No its not done that way in fl. I pay then X repays me. He cannot control the money the court order him to pay for his son care. It will look bad for X when we do go back to court.

bill, darling:
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Granted there could be some type of state mandate where you live, but to my knowledge, the only control you have over child support is writing the check.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Not even that...it comes thru wage garnishment. Federal law.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Sometimes, if you can show they are not spending what they get on the children, you can get support reduced. An example would be if they get free housing or child care from an employer or if they get a place which is much lower rent.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I was told by the Texas Attorney General's office that there is a federally mandated percentage: 20% for 1 child, 25% for 2, etc. That's what you HAVE to pay...it doesn't matter how the support is spent. I COULD spend it all at the liquor store or on my new boyfriend and x has no say. In fact, my first child support check went to help pay for repairs on my now husband's car. But you know what, he helps support x's daughter, takes her to school, ballgames, choir practice, shopping, etc. He makes it possible for us to live in a 3 bedroom home, not a one-bedroom apartment. He bought her tv, playstation, games, clothes, books, etc for the first four years we were married and sorry x paid nothing...no cs was requested in the divorce. This new husband never complained one time that x was a deadbeat dad.

And when I decided it really wasn't right for husband to pay and dad to shirk his responsibility, x went nuts. Told me *I* didn't deserve cs...told him it was for daughter, not me. It took a full year for the orders to be set and put into motion and even at the hearing, when the judge asked x if he thought this cs order was in the best interest of the child, he started to say 'no.'

But you bet his big old bald head was right up front last week when our daughter won second place in the local talent show...big dad, ain't he grand? Nobody else but me and my h knew what a sorry bum he is.

God, please never post about cs again...it just burns me up to hear parents whine about having to take care of their kids.

<small>[ November 26, 2002, 11:41 AM: Message edited by: franklymydears ]</small>

Donny,
When really thinking about it, how could someone really catorigize it? Lets see.A certain amount fo the electric(extra water for dishes washed and laundry , toilet flushings and bathes) that is if you have a well. If its city water, the charges change. Now for the laundry soap and don't forget the fabric softener sheets, and if it is done at the laundry mat, the extra expense for the machine use and the transportation as it is nessessary to go more often.
Now for other expenses, garbage bags, shampoo, cleaning supplies, clothing, treats, going out to eat or fast food which everyone is entitled to sometimes,and daycare to go to work-BIG EXPENSE, or daycare for getting out with friends etc.. which is nessessary for any parent, and the movies or movie rentals-the gas to get there, birthday parties.

Get my piont? It would take so much time to figure it out-JUST SEND THE CHECK and don't sweat it! And remember when the child is sick who needs to take care of them, and the rest of the time-even if the parent is having a bad day, it has to be done.

DH, it really depends on what state you live in it varies....

In my case I'm trying to get mine modified, its allowed once every 3 years, $800 a month for me is lot when you have nothing yourself...

When WW caused me to lose previous job because of her affairs in Feb 2001 as soon as I started working 6 months later she got me for all she could...

To have a guy invade my home, say your wife belongs to him, your wife buys this man clothes with your money and drive your car with your name on it, thats a hard blow, so while others think complaining about unjust child support amounts is geared at the kids, in my case its not, I took care of my kids far above what CS has to offer..

I think its sad when a wild woman decides she wants to sleep around with her lovers and then use the Law to validate and support her actions, buy her lovers gifts with her husbands money, kids in need of clothes, turn the his kids against the husband......Any family man would be displeased about the unjust actions of what was dealt to him by a legal system....Paying CS is not the issue in my case, it's knowing my Kids would have a better home than them watching the OM traffic of my Wexw....

I fought hard to break generational things I begin to see from my exw side of the family and then WW does her dirty work, to me CS in my case is just a disguise of the Welfare system dealt to the kids, struggle, have a man [OM] in the house that chooses not to work, and wait on a monthly check.....Thats what I don't like.... WW turned from everything we stood for and turned a 180, so I understand....

EverlastingCompassion,
Your story is so sad! I had a friend that this happened to. She was seeing another man and husband was stuck paying and she would go back and forth between the H and OM.
Finally, the H got so upset that he made a bon-fire or some of her things out in their yard while she was at OM's house for the night. He went to jail.

I would not ever agree to meet her OM because of the way it begann and she was still legally married.
She called me for sympathy and asked me what I thought of him burning some of her things and going to jail.
All that I said was," Well, your husband went to jail for getting upset, finally after his wife sleeping with another man. They used to stone people for doing what you are doing and there is a name for women who do what you are doing. As long as your husband loves you and does good for you- I do not want to ever meet OM."

Long story short, she and her husband got back together and she left OM for good. No other friend disagreed with her little boyfriend thing.

Ifeel really bad for a spouse in your shoes. Take care!

EverlastingCompassion,
Your story is so sad! I had a friend that this happened to. She was seeing another man and husband was stuck paying and she would go back and forth between the H and OM.
Finally, the H got so upset that he made a bon-fire or some of her things out in their yard while she was at OM's house for the night. He went to jail.

I would not ever agree to meet her OM because of the way it began and she was still legally married.
She called me for sympathy and asked me what I thought of him burning some of her things and going to jail.
All that I said was," Well, your husband went to jail for getting upset, finally after his wife sleeping with another man. They used to stone people for doing what you are doing and there is a name for women who do what you are doing. As long as your husband loves you and does good for you- I do not want to ever meet OM."

Long story short, she and her husband got back together and she left OM for good. No other friend disagreed with her little boyfriend thing.

I feel really bad for a spouse in your shoes. Take care!