Question: What's an a appropriate salutation to sign to an stbxw's birthday card? Also, what's an appropriate amount of $$$s to spend on a gift? She's already taken me to the bank, driven us to the brink of bankrupcy, and stolen stuff from my apartment. But, I suppose I feel that a gift is in order as well.

Thoughts? My birthday, a month after D-Day, she took $100 to leave and when confronted on it, said it was to buy me a birthday present. She then bought me a $12 picture frame. She spent $145 on her lover's birthday a month before D-Day. I'm half tempted to point this out to her and go spend $133 on myself as a birthday gift to her.

How do you deal with this stuff? I hope someone that's been through this can give me a few pointers.

Lyxa -
I think a card signed by you is an appropriate gift. If she has the nerve to ask about a gift, tell her that you couldn't afford one.

I went through the same thing with X - He bought xmas gift and B-Day gifts for OW and told me that he was buying in advance for Valentines and my B-Day in July. He spent more than $500.00 on her between xmas, valentines and B-Day. When confronted he always made up some lie about it. If I would have only seen the light long before and put a freeze on the credit cards. He was living a life way beyond our means and almost put us in the poor house.

I made dinner with the kids and gave him a nice gift for his B-Day in March and when my B-Day came in July he wasn't even home. He was on a vacation that he couldn't afford (no pay checks since end of May).

I sure don't plan on sending B-Day cards any more.

Oh god, Lyxa, I wouldn't give her jack. You are too kind. It's time to think solely of yourself.
She's squeezed anough out of you.