My husband is 49 originally from North Carolina but lived in Atlanta,GA when we met. I am 41 originally from Pgh,PA.We met in May '98 and one month later we met when he came to visit me. Two days after meeting he presented an engagement ring, which I was taken back with shock. After he returned home, he asked me if he could move in with me.Meanwhile I'm flattered that he's willing to move to a city with no friends or family.I agreed but then found out that he wanted to get married as soon as he moved in, I refused and agreed to 3 months of living together first. I believe from reading Dr. Haley's book, "His needs, her needs" that my husband is a born liar with a serious character disorder. He lied about having his mail forwarded, I checked it out only to found out that he did not. He was previously married with a 27 year old son that he lied about having a relationship with. I asked him if he had any other children since he's been single for 22 years. He lied, one month after marriage his mother died, while at the funeral I found out he had another son, 17 years old. Once again I asked if there were any others, he said no. In May 2000, his paycheck was attached for child support for yet another unknown child, a 10 year old daughter and he owed $8,000 in back child support. Just 3 weeks ago I found out there's another child that he owes $18,000 in back child support. He lied about all his bills being paid, but yet I found out that he owes the IRS thousands of dollars, there are other bills from his past that have caught up with him and they have attached his pay. I found out that the reason he was in such a rush to get married was because he was being evicted from his place so he needed somewhere to go. He lied about telling his family that we were married. When we went to the funeral for his mother, no one knew about me and we were together 5 months before all this. He lied about his profession, he told me he was a doctor in education with a PhD. Only to find out he started working at the Univ on an entry level position. What amazes me is that after 2 and a half years of marriage, he has lied about everything. Where the bills were suppose to be paid, he's at least $100,000 in debt. He went from 1 son to 3 other unknown children, where he's buried deep in back child support for two of them. He lies repeatedly about everything. He mistreats my 12 year old son. He lied about wanting to be a friend and step father to him but yet he doesn't even speak or talk to my son. Our first christmas together he brought my daughter and son gifts. Last year, he only brought me a gift, said he forgot to buy anything for my kids and they live in the house with us every day. It was just his way of showing my kids and me that he doesn't like them. He's jealous of them when I spend too much time. I have allowed this man into my home which he has turned it from a peaceful christian home into a hell hole. We don't to each other. I feel used and abused. I constantly tell him how I feel. He puts the burden of this marriage on me. If I don't call him on his job, he won't call me. If I don't tell him I love him, then he won't tell me. He doesn't express his feelings at all. I feel that he only used me to gain security because I own my home and he gets home cooked meals. I feel his plan was to gain all these assets along with having someone to have sex with, money and vacations. I have shut down completely. We haven't had sex in months. I know he has a lot of deep rooted issues from his past childhood but he doesn't feel like he has any problems. When I try to talk to him he just looks at me. And everytime I catch him in a lie he never apologizes for the hurt and pain he's causes me. It has been a constant nonstop stream of lies even up to last week. I feel bankrupt, my love has died. I have expressed my feelings to him in every way possible yet I get no response. It's like he's gained what he wanted as far as security and he's very comfortable living this way. We don't spend any time together, we're so far apart as night and day and yet he goes from day to day acting like everything is okay. I can't get him to talk. But whenever he thinks I've had enough and may be thinking about putting him out my house then he tries warm up to me. We are now in separate bedrooms because I refuse to sleep next to a man who will talk to me. All he has brought to this marriage is a bunch of lies, deceit, dishonesty, and division. A bunch of unpaid bills that are still catching up with him to the point where he can't even help me pay any bills because of all his debt. A bunch of unfathered kids that has him buried deep in current and back child support. All this he should have told me about before asking for my hand in marriage. How can we have a future together when he has to lied about us not being married because the bill collectors will take his whole paycheck and make me responsible for taking care of him. We have to live in deceit, we can't file taxes together and I'm afraid that because of his past it will eventually catch up to me. I just put my daughter through college and I don't want to lose everything I worked hard and not be able to send my son to college all because of him. He's not tryting to work with me in being truthful so how can I work with him. This is no way to live and I can't see a future in this marriage for us. Because he should have told me about all this before marriage. He lied about everything and he's still lying. It amazes me how he can look me in my face and continuously lie to me. He goes behind my back and continues to try to get credit cards without me knowing it. I feel used in a way that the only reason he wanted to get married was for security because he does things like he still single. He never comes to me to discuss his plans about anything. I am very angry. But I'm at the end of the rope for trying to make this marriage work. I have tried talking over and over again. I let him know how I feel and the pain I feel. For example just yesterday, he argued with me for not fixing his breakfast, meanwhile I was sick with a very serious case of diarrhea. He never once asked me if I was okay or feeling any better. He just wanted his food. He's very selfish. And now that he's not getting any sex, he complains about how I'm treating him but yet he doesn't want to talk about how he's treating me. It's all about him. I know I can't make him change and he will soon be 50 years old I think it's too late. Maybe that's why he's been alone for the last 22 years.<P>------------------<BR>

I think I may be saying something that you already know. A few months is not long enough to really get to know someone, even if he were an honest person. He had told you a tremendous amount of lies about very crucial things in a person life. I don't know if that is something that can be easily conquered. Look at how he treats his own children. I don't think he has the capacity to treat yours any better. I think you realize all of this because of statements you made in your post. If you really love him and think that you can work this out, there are things that you can do. Of course, he has to be willing to give also. Have you discussed Dr. Harley's principles with him and would he be interested in participating?<P>Also, your children are the most important people in your life. Where is their father? How are they dealing with this new man? I would consider the long term effects this man could have on them.<p>[This message has been edited by cleopatra (edited November 29, 2000).]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Can a marriage survive lies,deceit,& dishonesty?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Nope, sure can't, but you can accept responibility for yourself to begin making changes in you that allows for others to suffere the consequences of their behavior, meaning you don't clean up after the messes he gets himself into. You need to protect your assets while H goes through this process. You need to protect your children as well. Although your H states he has been on his own for 22 years, my guess is that he has gone from one dysfunctional relationship to another, ergo a number of children less than 22 years old and you were a prize catch so he married you. Have to admit though that I suspect that there are other marriage licenses out there as well and would wonder how many divorces took place and how many are still hanging out. <P>1 Cor 7 tells us that we are not to leave our husbands since we might be instrumental in bringing them to the fold with our lifestyle and prayers, but it also states that if we do leave (like on a rooftop to avoid the constant drip, drip of a faucet), we are not to divorce unless there is infidelity. My guess is that if you put him out of your house due to his behavior, he would find another woman in a heartbeat. Jesus spoke the truth in love to the Samaritan woman at the well; he didn't mince words with her about the fact that she had had 5 husbands and was now living with a guy who was not her husband. He was respectful to her and matter of fact with her. He did not worry about what she would think of him for saying the truth but cared enough about her to challenge her to a higher calling. That is our example for speaking the truth in love to our husbands. We are to teach our children at all times. What are you teaching your son about relationships in light of this present behavior of your H. What is he seeing? Is he seeing you stand for the truth or lying to cover up for your H? Is he being given an example of how a man is supposed to love his wife as described in Eph 5, so that in turn, he will know how to love his own wife someday? There is a lot at stake here my sister. Am praying for wisdom for you.

beautiful reply Sue! There is a lot to be learned in that.<P>cleo

Ms Stunned, I too am stunned. First, was this man saved when you married him? If not, he is not accountable to God, so do not expect him to be. He can only be accountable to the world he serves. Although he is not saved, I agree with Sue, if you put him out of your home, he will surely commit adultery or worse. <BR>You must go to your county recorders office and have them do a marriage license search on him. If he is,in fact, married to another woman or was when you married him, you, do indeed, have grounds for divorce. <BR>Also, I would go to your local Police dept and search for a criminal history. If you share with them what you've shared here, they will surely think you are a crazy woman and not take you seriously, so be as vague as possible. <BR>Keep your wits about you and don't get this man angry. He is likely prone to violence, so be careful. Most importantly, speak to your pastor. More than ever, you need your Christian family. God will guide and protect you. Seek Him daily.<BR>Keep us posted.<BR>If you like, you may email me at In_Courage@juno.com<P>L

Ms stunned...wow!<BR>My soon to be x is a compulsive liar. His parents even told me he's never been able to tell the truth. Of course, I never believed them...<BR>Now that I have filed, I am finding out so many lies. <BR>Now, I'm not well read in the Bible...so, I can't quote scripture. But, I do know that NO ONE has to live with any sort of abuse...and I deem lying and lack of affection/attention as emotional and psychological abuse..not to mention the financial abuse you have suffered!! I do not believe, no matter what the Bible says, that God intended for us to live with that sort of strain on our psyche. If I believe that, then I have no hope for the future. First and foremost, you must be happy. If you are not happy, how can you serve God and yourself??? <BR>I had to finally take responsibility for myself and my newborn...which meant getting rid of him! There is someone out there for me...someone God intended for me to live the rest of my life with...someone who will treat me with the love and respect that I deserve...I believe that for everyone! If it takes me 10 or 20 years to find him, so be it.<BR>And, if I sound harsh, I apologize. Having lived for 3 years with an emotional cripple and a master manipulator, I find that I don't have the patience to [censored]-foot around an issue.<BR>You take care of yourself and your children...let him fend for himself. And, I agree...go to the police and have him investigated. At least my STBX was honest when he told me about his felony child abuse charge....I believed he was innocent until I suffered abuse by him. Dummy me for falling for him in the first place.

Buried in your post, like some kind of small print that could be overlooked, is mention of your children and how he has treated them. Girl, I am about to flame you like a blowtorch!<P>How can you tolerate that man for one more hour after you see the hurt he does to your children, the babies you carried in your body and labored to push out into the world!<P>He's literally taking food off of their plates, and jeopardizing the roof over their heads, and their future educations. <P>Is the house still in your name? Do you know a good locksmith? Do you have a security system, with a code on it? How about a good lawyer?<P>This guy's actions are so outrageous, I don't care if he's Born Again, Saved or whatever other Christian sect he might say he believes or pretend to find after you throw his kiester to the curb. <P>CHANGE THE LOCKS, tell your children you're sorry your selfishness has hurt them, that you're going to make it up to them, and that your mistake of marrying somebody you didn't know after a whirlwind courtship should be a lesson to them. <P>And make those children the new center of your life. Maybe you can repair the damage you've done to them and repair the relationship you have with them.<P><P>------------------<BR>Belle, Domestic Goddess

Belle...I have a one word response to your post.<BR>AMEN!!<P>------------------<BR>A family is a cirlce of friends who love you.

I would like to take this time to thank everyone for their responses, there were a lot of issues mentioned. <P>To Cleopatra, just to let you know I don't love my H anymore. The amount of love that I have for him was destroyed from all the lies, deceit and dishonesty. Love cannot grow from pain. I did try to discuss Dr. Haley's principles with his but he wasn't interested.<P>To SueB, I believe that if my H would have been honest with me before marriage then I would be willing to hang in there and bring him into the fold. But I don't believe that GOD wants me to stay in a marriage where my life and my children's life are being jeopardized by his past when he didn't love and respect me enough to let me know all of this before hand. He did not give me an option, he just preyed on rushing into marriage before all his mess catches up with him. I stand the risk of loosing my house, my pay check being garnished for $26,000 of back child support. Because believe me when they find out that we're married I will have to pay.It's only the grace of GOD that they haven't found out yet because we've been married for 2 and a half years now.<P>To Single_again, I found out after the fact I found out that his mother had tried several times to contact me to tell me about her rotten son. You have given a perfect description of what he is....an emotional cripple and a master manipulator. I definitely agree with your response about God not wanting us to live in any kind of abuse. It's similar to someone eating all the wrong kind of foods to block the arteries from sending blood to the heart. Well if I have feelings of pain, hurt, anger, fustration, etc. All these emotions will block my spirit from reaching GOD to the point where I am not spiritually free to praise and worship him. Thank you for sharing your situation with me.<P>To Bellevue, from the first incident of my H mistreating my children brought fire to my eyes. My children are the most important to me and since he's already caused my daughter to move out on her own, his next plot was to drive my son out to go live with his dad. But I continuously let him know that my son would be with me until he's grown. Yes, I agree with you he is taking food off their plates and jeopardizing the roof over their heads. My house is still in my name, along with everything else. I never changed anything because I had some suspicions about him right after we got married. I didn't even change my last name, I'm still using my ex-husband's last name. My H doesn't care, his main goal and game plan to gain a roof over his head. I have a already apologized to my children and I promised my son that if GOD's will is for me to be married again I will definitely wait until my son is out of my house. But for right now I have no intentions of ever getting married again. This marriage has put a bad taste in mouth. My plans are to get more involved with the single's women ministry at my church and let my experience be used to teach other single women how a low a man will stoop to conguer his game plan.<P>Just to let you all know, just this past weekend just as Psychlynn mentioned in her post that my H is likely prone to violence. Well, this past Saturday night 12/2. We had an arguement, my son heard me say to my H, "get off of me" so my son opened his bedroom door and my H run over to my son, got in his face, they were chest to chest, nose to nose about to fight. My son was not going to back down. I had to come between the two of them to break them apart. I finally seen the rage and voilence in my H and the hate he has for my son. But the exorcist rose up in me and I told him if he put his hands on my son, I would draw some blood from his body.<BR>Overall he's getting out of my house permanently I have packed his belongings and he's now looking for an apartment. My attorney warned me that he's not really going to move out he's just calling my bluff because he doesn't have any money or family.<BR>I can't just put him out because I need to generate police reports of them having to come to me house more than once. If I put him out and he with him not having anywhere to go (no family or friends) he can call the police and locksmith and gain entry back into my house. My attorney feels that he's been in this situation before so he knows the ropes. In the meantime I will do what's necessary to force him out and to cause arguements to generate more police reports. <P>So ask all of you to continue to pray for me and I will keep you updated to what's going on.<P>Thanks for being concerned. God bless you.<P>Ms stunned<BR>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SueB:<BR><B> Nope, sure can't, but you can accept responibility for yourself to begin making changes in you that allows for others to suffere the consequences of their behavior, meaning you don't clean up after the messes he gets himself into. You need to protect your assets while H goes through this process. You need to protect your children as well. Although your H states he has been on his own for 22 years, my guess is that he has gone from one dysfunctional relationship to another, ergo a number of children less than 22 years old and you were a prize catch so he married you. Have to admit though that I suspect that there are other marriage licenses out there as well and would wonder how many divorces took place and how many are still hanging out. <P>1 Cor 7 tells us that we are not to leave our husbands since we might be instrumental in bringing them to the fold with our lifestyle and prayers, but it also states that if we do leave (like on a rooftop to avoid the constant drip, drip of a faucet), we are not to divorce unless there is infidelity. My guess is that if you put him out of your house due to his behavior, he would find another woman in a heartbeat. Jesus spoke the truth in love to the Samaritan woman at the well; he didn't mince words with her about the fact that she had had 5 husbands and was now living with a guy who was not her husband. He was respectful to her and matter of fact with her. He did not worry about what she would think of him for saying the truth but cared enough about her to challenge her to a higher calling. That is our example for speaking the truth in love to our husbands. We are to teach our children at all times. What are you teaching your son about relationships in light of this present behavior of your H. What is he seeing? Is he seeing you stand for the truth or lying to cover up for your H? Is he being given an example of how a man is supposed to love his wife as described in Eph 5, so that in turn, he will know how to love his own wife someday? There is a lot at stake here my sister. Am praying for wisdom for you.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>I would like to take this time to thank everyone for their responses, there were a lot of issues mentioned. <P>To Cleopatra, just to let you know I don't love my H anymore. The amount of love that I have for him was destroyed from all the lies, deceit and dishonesty. Love cannot grow from pain. I did try to discuss Dr. Haley's principles with his but he wasn't interested.<P>I made another response on my post to let<BR>everyone know the lastest. Please read my response. Thank you for responding<P>Ms. Stunned

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SueB:<BR><B> Nope, sure can't, but you can accept responibility for yourself to begin making changes in you that allows for others to suffere the consequences of their behavior, meaning you don't clean up after the messes he gets himself into. You need to protect your assets while H goes through this process. You need to protect your children as well. Although your H states he has been on his own for 22 years, my guess is that he has gone from one dysfunctional relationship to another, ergo a number of children less than 22 years old and you were a prize catch so he married you. Have to admit though that I suspect that there are other marriage licenses out there as well and would wonder how many divorces took place and how many are still hanging out. <P>1 Cor 7 tells us that we are not to leave our husbands since we might be instrumental in bringing them to the fold with our lifestyle and prayers, but it also states that if we do leave (like on a rooftop to avoid the constant drip, drip of a faucet), we are not to divorce unless there is infidelity. My guess is that if you put him out of your house due to his behavior, he would find another woman in a heartbeat. Jesus spoke the truth in love to the Samaritan woman at the well; he didn't mince words with her about the fact that she had had 5 husbands and was now living with a guy who was not her husband. He was respectful to her and matter of fact with her. He did not worry about what she would think of him for saying the truth but cared enough about her to challenge her to a higher calling. That is our example for speaking the truth in love to our husbands. We are to teach our children at all times. What are you teaching your son about relationships in light of this present behavior of your H. What is he seeing? Is he seeing you stand for the truth or lying to cover up for your H? Is he being given an example of how a man is supposed to love his wife as described in Eph 5, so that in turn, he will know how to love his own wife someday? There is a lot at stake here my sister. Am praying for wisdom for you.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>To SueB, I believe that if my H would have been honest with me before marriage then I would be willing to hang in there and bring him into the fold. But I don't believe that GOD wants me to stay in a marriage where my life and my children's life are being jeopardized by his past when he didn't love and respect me enough to let me know all of this before hand. He did not give me an option, he just preyed on rushing into marriage before all his mess catches up with him. I stand the risk of loosing my house, my pay check being garnished for $26,000 of back child support. Because believe me when they find out that we're married I will have to pay.It's only the grace of GOD that they haven't found out yet because we've been married for 2 and a half years now.<P>I just updated my post as to give an update<BR>about my situation. Thank you for your response.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by single_again:<BR><B>Ms stunned...wow!<BR>My soon to be x is a compulsive liar. His parents even told me he's never been able to tell the truth. Of course, I never believed them...<BR>Now that I have filed, I am finding out so many lies. <BR>Now, I'm not well read in the Bible...so, I can't quote scripture. But, I do know that NO ONE has to live with any sort of abuse...and I deem lying and lack of affection/attention as emotional and psychological abuse..not to mention the financial abuse you have suffered!! I do not believe, no matter what the Bible says, that God intended for us to live with that sort of strain on our psyche. If I believe that, then I have no hope for the future. First and foremost, you must be happy. If you are not happy, how can you serve God and yourself??? <BR>I had to finally take responsibility for myself and my newborn...which meant getting rid of him! There is someone out there for me...someone God intended for me to live the rest of my life with...someone who will treat me with the love and respect that I deserve...I believe that for everyone! If it takes me 10 or 20 years to find him, so be it.<BR>And, if I sound harsh, I apologize. Having lived for 3 years with an emotional cripple and a master manipulator, I find that I don't have the patience to [censored]-foot around an issue.<BR>You take care of yourself and your children...let him fend for himself. And, I agree...go to the police and have him investigated. At least my STBX was honest when he told me about his felony child abuse charge....I believed he was innocent until I suffered abuse by him. Dummy me for falling for him in the first place.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>To Single_again, I found out after the fact I found out that his mother had tried several times to contact me to tell me about her rotten son. You have given a perfect description of what he is....an emotional cripple and a master manipulator. I definitely agree with your response about<BR>God not wanting us to live in any kind of abuse. It's similar to someone eating all the wrong kind of foods to block the arteries from sending blood to the heart. Well if I have feelings of pain, hurt, anger, fustration, etc. All these emotions will block my spirit from reaching GOD to the<BR>point where I am not spiritually free to praise and worship him. Thank you for sharing your situation with me.<P>Thank you so much for your response. I posted an update to my situation. Remember me in your prayers.<P>Ms Stunned

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Bellevue:<BR><B>Buried in your post, like some kind of small print that could be overlooked, is mention of your children and how he has treated them. Girl, I am about to flame you like a blowtorch!<P>How can you tolerate that man for one more hour after you see the hurt he does to your children, the babies you carried in your body and labored to push out into the world!<P>He's literally taking food off of their plates, and jeopardizing the roof over their heads, and their future educations. <P>Is the house still in your name? Do you know a good locksmith? Do you have a security system, with a code on it? How about a good lawyer?<P>This guy's actions are so outrageous, I don't care if he's Born Again, Saved or whatever other Christian sect he might say he believes or pretend to find after you throw his kiester to the curb. <P>CHANGE THE LOCKS, tell your children you're sorry your selfishness has hurt them, that you're going to make it up to them, and that your mistake of marrying somebody you didn't know after a whirlwind courtship should be a lesson to them. <P>And make those children the new center of your life. Maybe you can repair the damage you've done to them and repair the relationship you have with them.<P><BR></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>To Bellevue, from the first incident of my H mistreating my children brought fire to my eyes. My children are the most important to me and since he's already caused my daughter to move out on her own, his next plot was to drive my son out to go live with his dad. But I continuously let him know that my son would be with me until he's grown. Yes, I agree with you he is taking food off their plates and jeopardizing the roof over their heads. My house is still in my name, along with everything else. I never changed anything because I had some suspicions about him right after we got married. I didn't even change my last name, I'm still using my ex-husband's last name. My H doesn't care, his main goal and game plan to gain a roof over his head. I have already apologized to my children and I promised my son that if GOD's will is for me to be married again I will definitely wait until my son is out of my house. But for right now I have no intentions of ever getting married again. This marriage has put a bad taste in mouth. My plans are to get more involved with the single's women ministry at my church and let my experience be used to teach other single women how a low a man will stoop to conguer his game plan.<P>Thank you so much for your response. I just updated my post about my situation.<P>Ms. Stunned

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Bellevue:<BR><B>Buried in your post, like some kind of small print that could be overlooked, is mention of your children and how he has treated them. Girl, I am about to flame you like a blowtorch!<P>How can you tolerate that man for one more hour after you see the hurt he does to your children, the babies you carried in your body and labored to push out into the world!<P>He's literally taking food off of their plates, and jeopardizing the roof over their heads, and their future educations. <P>Is the house still in your name? Do you know a good locksmith? Do you have a security system, with a code on it? How about a good lawyer?<P>This guy's actions are so outrageous, I don't care if he's Born Again, Saved or whatever other Christian sect he might say he believes or pretend to find after you throw his kiester to the curb. <P>CHANGE THE LOCKS, tell your children you're sorry your selfishness has hurt them, that you're going to make it up to them, and that your mistake of marrying somebody you didn't know after a whirlwind courtship should be a lesson to them. <P>And make those children the new center of your life. Maybe you can repair the damage you've done to them and repair the relationship you have with them.<P><BR></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>To Bellevue, from the first incident of my H mistreating my children brought fire to my eyes. My children are the most important to me and since he's already caused my daughter to move out on her own, his next plot was to drive my son out to go live with his dad. But I continuously let him know that my son would be with me until he's grown. Yes, I agree with you he is taking food off their plates and jeopardizing the roof over their heads. My house is still in my name, along with everything else. I never changed anything because I had some suspicions about him right after we got married. I didn't even change my last name, I'm still using my ex-husband's last name. My H doesn't care, his main goal and game plan to gain a roof over his head. I have already apologized to my children and I promised my son that if GOD's will is for me to be married again I will definitely wait until my son is out of my house. But for right now I have no intentions of ever getting married again. This marriage has put a bad taste in mouth. My plans are to get more involved with the single's women ministry at my church and let my experience be used to teach other single women how a low a man will stoop to conguer his game plan.<P>Thank you so much for your response. I just updated my post about my situation.<P>Ms. Stunned

Do you still live in Atlanta?<BR>There are plenty of places that he can go stay. Does your lawyer expect you to wait until something bad happens? If you have witnesses to his lies and behavior, is that enough for the courts? <P>cleo

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by cleopatra:<BR><B>Do you still live in Atlanta?<BR>There are plenty of places that he can go stay. Does your lawyer expect you to wait until something bad happens? If you have witnesses to his lies and behavior, is that enough for the courts? <P>cleo</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>My H moved from Atlanta to where I live which is Pittsburgh, PA. Isn't that what usually happens where the courts don't intervene until something seriously happens. But like my attorney said, since he doesn't have any friends or family here. If I put him out he could have the police and locksmith let him back in because there is no previous history of domestic problems with us. So I will have to start calling the police on him and just lie and tell them that we were arguing even if we aren't. Apparently until he puts his hands on me, the only thing is for me to continue to make living in my house a double hell hole and try to force him out and he knows this that's why he's tip toeing around being a good little boy because he's trying to avoid having to get out of my house. But believe me I will do everything possible along with much prayers, because he's definitely getting the HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE.And his lies won't stand up in court, they will help but my attorney said that the judge will tell me that I should have given it more time to get to know him before marrying him. Which is true, because since he moved in with me, eventually I would have found out about all these things without being married to him and he knew that,which is why he kept pushing and trying to rush marriage before I started finding out. He's been in previous relationships where he's been dumped when they found out about him, so his game plan this time was to rush into marriage with someone from another state because it take a little longer before his mess catches up to him. When he moved from Atlanta they were taking child support from his pay check. So what, he suddenly got amnesia, no, he was just trying to be slick and get over on me. That's why it's all back firing on him now. The one thing he failed to do was to get to know me as a person, so he really doesn't know what I'm capable of doing. This is my hometown, born and raised. It will take a little more time but I promise you he will be out!

Okay, I'm mollified. You are fighting to get him out of the house. I'm rooting for you. Ugh. That guy is Scum.<P>I'm confused about the law in Georgia. They can really get the police to change the locks, etc? And the house is in your name? I don't understand. But keep the faith, and find some way to get him out. Ugh.<P>------------------<BR>Belle, Domestic Goddess