This is more me getting my feelings out rather than a question.

I'm really outside my comfort zone with having to do home maintenance especially when I have to contact professionals to get certain jobs done.

I've had no hot water since Saturday and it has taken me this long to contact someone to help. My stbx installed the unit in Nov. '02 so it's frustrating calling the professionals NOW.

I do have someone coming later today, but I can feel myself starting to stress about this. I am behind on college work since I've been shoveling snow off the roof, getting leaks to stop, etc.. I guess what can go wrong is in fact going wrong for me with this house. I would love to walk away and get into an apartment so I don't have to deal with this stuff.

I stayed in the house primarily because I felt I could afford it better than stbxH and I didn't want him to ruin my credit if he didn't make the payments.

~ sigh ~

I'm feeling overwhelmed!

Thanks for "listening"!

<img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

<small>[ January 08, 2003, 04:25 PM: Message edited by: Free2BMe ]</small>

Rather than despair, consider yourself empowered that you are able to handle all of these things.
PS. I relate to the H not paying bills.
The maintenance guy at my office is now on the phone list of all of my divorcing and single friends. He's married, but we all have little handyman tasks to do around our houses. Be creative, and when you find a good handyman, ask him for recommendations for other jobs, plumbing, heating, etc, he will probably have his own network.
Stay strong.

Free2BMe-

I can understand your frustrations as I'm also taking care of the house after requesting my XWW to move out. The one thing I'd say is that you should make sure you're in the house for the right reasons (ie. you think it's a good investment in the long run, you like it and enjoy working on it, etc.) You could still work it out where your credit would be protected and you wouldn't have to keep the house if you didn't want to. If you sold it you could get your equity or if he kept it you could request he pay you off with a home equity loan (assuming you have equity in it). Good luck with this!

Thank you both for the replies! I live in a mobile home amd WH had to talk me into it. BUT for the cost at the time it was the best alternative to renting as we have 4 boys between us (both of us married b4). My H has a bankrupsy from his past, student loans and back taxes (although I think they are cleared up now, he didn't have credit if we bought a normal home). I had excellant credit when we married so we were able get into this home. It's not where I want to be and find myself extremely embarrassed when I have to tell people I live in a trailer (based on the negative views society has and the "wonderful" jokes that circulate).

I'm not an overly emotional person, but I find myself in tears today as this "project" is more a nightmare to me. I can feel myself slipping into a depressive state (I take Paxil).

And just to add to my "state of mind" my jeans are tight, I'm behind with school work, my boss is on my case, and I'm ALWAYS tired!! I've been trying to get to the gym, but with boys and school and these home distasters I take too much time off so I try to put in extra time when I can.

Anyway, thanks again!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

<small>[ January 08, 2003, 10:11 AM: Message edited by: Free2BMe ]</small>

Free-

I'm sorry to hear that things are piling up on you right now. Hopefully this visit by the repairman won't be too hard on your purse. If your H installed a new water heater last year then it shouldn't be anything too major as they're usually good for 10 - 15 years. With regards to being in the trailer, I wouldn't worry too much about what others think about it. If you really don't like being there and would rather be in a apartment, I say sell it and go for it! Good luck!

Be proud of what you have, and of what you can do on your own. Feel free to vent here about things, but remember, you are a strong woman and you can take care of things for yourself.
The more you dwell on the bad things, the more they appear. Keep positive thoughts in mind.

PS. I'm not big on SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) but I'm feeling exhausted these days. I think sometimes our bodies just tell us to take it easy.
Keep your head up.

Litchfield and newly,

Thanks for being here for me today... I'm feeling a bit better as the day goes on. My H let me go to his apartment and take a shower (he was at work). I wasn't going to go, but thought it would help if I was able to take one and get dressed. It's amazing how just being able to take a shower and wash your hair makes so much difference.

The plumber just called and he's on his way... an hour before originally scheduled! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Thank you both for the support!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

*** U P D A T E ***

I have pulled myself up from the possible depths of despair! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> This was so easy in the end... and after watching him I could probably do it myself if I had to do it again (and save myself $80). I had to crawl under the mobil mansion (mobile home) and turn the water off/on since there's a few feet of snow blocking the entrance and the guy was too big to fit. I felt like a tunnel rat getting in and out. LOL

Anyway, I can't believe I didn't make the call sooner... all along I was hoping it would go away or fix on it's own so I wouldn't have to deal with it... I feel empowered and so much better!

I'm glad I could come here and post my frustrations.

Thank you so much!!!!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />