Thanks to all who replied from my last thread. It really helped me today.

Well I am slightly disappointed because I didn't get the house. I couldn't afford to buy my stbx out.

We settled for shared parental responsibility. Unfortunately I live in a joint custody state and since my stbx wanted to be a willing participant in the raising of Jared, the Mediator felt that shared parental responsibility was the way to go. My Attorney agreed. I will have Jared on W,T,F on one week and then M,T,F,S,Su the next. That way stbx has Jared every other weekend and I have two days a week that I can go to the office, appts, etc. There was no way that I could give stbx less days unless we went to Court which I did not want to do.

I lost the house but I gained an engagement ring and a lot of equity from the house that I can use towards a townhome or villa. Plus I got to keep my 401 K intact and my car.

I can't get child support because stbx does not work, unless I went to court to fight that but my Atty said that, that may not happen. However, when stbx graduates later this year and finally gets a job, I can have this agreement amended to where it could go back to the court and they can re-calculate child support.

I feel better that this is handled but now I have to worry about moving. According to the agreement, stbx will have to stay in the house until it is sold.

Do you think I got a good deal?

How long do you have to find a new place to live?

Sue, the house goes up for sale within 30 days. Judging by Florida's slow market, we will probably be here for awhile.

I'm shocked that it's 50/50 at Jared's young age. Were you strong enough with the mediator or do you feel that you gave in?
Take your time away from Jared to read all you can to heal yourself and to become the best person and parent that you can be.
If you don't already have Mom's House/Dad's House or "How to help children cope with Divorce the Sandcastles Way" get these from the library to aid in your coparenting.
God bless you and your family.

Hi BTL - from the tone of your post, yes, I think you got a good deal because it keeps you out of court. It sounds like your biggest worry is moving, so it could have been much worse. My understanding of a successful mediation, is that both sides should wish they had gotten a little more. Maybe instead of a good deal (which can only happen if your husband got a bad deal), we should say it was a successful mediation?

Newly - It's 8/14, not 50/50. This type of arrangement is not radical if the father wants to stay that involved, if he does not drop out.

- Tom