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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 140
M
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M Offline
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 140
X has had denial, angry, no contact with child, blaming me for D, & yes I was told that I made him fall in love with OW. At times I thought he was going crazy, not knowing who he wanted, back & forth to me & OW was driving me crazy. he should be happy with OW, they are engaged, his family accepted her what more could he want. X is still showing angry not only towards me but our son. Son will not accept OW into his life, dad knows it. Do they ever get over the angry stage? our D was may 02, X moved out 5-01 to be with MOW. We are not in the same state anymore. friends & OW X says that their new life together isnt that great. Both brought problems from the last M into their new life. Is the last stage Guilt? X is a person that is always right. I feel X maybe blaming me for his new life with OW. Is there a time table for each stage we have? Are we talking months or years?

m-17 1/2 yrs
me-48, x 43
c-13, 29, 8 gd
d-5-02

ow-32
c-3 under 11
m-10yrs
d-7-02

Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 85
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 85
Myfamily, sorry to hear that you are getting this.

Most WS & OP relationships do not last, they are fraught with difficulty from the outset as they are often based on the fantasy/fog of the A.

When reality comes crashing in there is a lot of awkward emotion. In your case this is X's anger toward you.

Sadly the best you can do is stay the hell away from them, as more than likely the relationship will implode. My X's did just that and keeps doing just that. You need to move on with your life. The timeframe could be weeks, months or years for them.

Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 680
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 680
The last stage is that they mentally rewrite their history to account for their behavior and whatever the consequence(s) of that behavior is.

Like a fish story, each telling/recounting will exaggerate things more and more to get sympathy when they should be getting smacked.

If they are trying to reconcile, they'll rewrite it to be remorseful but not ENTIRELY their faults. If they are ending their relationship with you, it'll be ALL your fault and they were a victim. Count on that.


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